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Son moved away and Hurting #6266713
06/25/18 12:23 PM
06/25/18 12:23 PM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,422
Akron, Ohio
bass10 Offline OP
trapper
bass10  Offline OP
trapper

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,422
Akron, Ohio
Well my 22 year old son graduated college this past May. We just moved him 1:40 minutes away to Pittsburgh for his first full time job. He commuted to college from home as we live 10 minutes from Akron University. I have to tell you if you want to see a 6'3", 250 pound baby come and visit. I am a wreck. I don't know how everyone does it. I had daily interactions with him for 22 years. He did his own Landscaping thing thru college that paid him quite well and much better than a summer job. I used to beach daily at the 6 wheel barrels, 3 mowers, trailers, weed eaters, bags of leaves, etc. he'd have laying around my drive and yard (I live on a cul de sac in an allotment not the country). Its only been one day and boy what I'd do to help him load up those wheel barrels and go mulch a house (I absolutely hate it) every day for the rest of my life. I truly never thought it'd be this hard but boy was I wrong.


"The more people I meet the more I love my dog!"
Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: bass10] #6266717
06/25/18 12:33 PM
06/25/18 12:33 PM
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 2,965
Ohio
OhioBoy Offline
trapper
OhioBoy  Offline
trapper

Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 2,965
Ohio
As far as moving away goes. Less than 2 hours isn't that bad buddy. Be grateful for that. There and back in a day is more than doable. Same with to your place and back. Let him figure some things out as we all need to do and don't be surprised when he moves back to the area. Just give it time. Let him figure some things out.

Spread the word on how well off he is doing in church, around town, and etc and get one of those local freckled up red haired girls interested. He'll be back round shortly. lol.

Wish you all the best.


Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: bass10] #6266724
06/25/18 12:43 PM
06/25/18 12:43 PM
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 19,927
SEPA
L
Lugnut Offline
trapper
Lugnut  Offline
trapper
L

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 19,927
SEPA
My oldest daughter decided to go to college in London. We supported her decisions. The day we dropped her off at the Philly airport was our first time without her in our home. The wife and I cried like babies on the trip home.

She has become a world traveler and is currently at an embassy post in Nigeria. We have gotten used to seeing her at home one or twice a year. You will too. Like OhioBoy said, be glad it wasn’t farther away.

My wife and I along with our three daughters keep in touch daily through a group chat on Facebook Messenger.


Eh...wot?

Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: bass10] #6266744
06/25/18 01:21 PM
06/25/18 01:21 PM
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 9,649
se SD
rags57078 Offline
Humorist
rags57078  Offline
Humorist

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 9,649
se SD
Empty nest is a real thing , our kids trapped , hunted and fished with me . I slowed way down on all of it and was lost , I did pick up the fishing game more and trap a bit here and there , as for hunting that is about all gone now


Off in my own world

Fish on !!!!!!!



47 years in this game of trapping
Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: rags57078] #6266752
06/25/18 01:33 PM
06/25/18 01:33 PM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,422
Akron, Ohio
bass10 Offline OP
trapper
bass10  Offline OP
trapper

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,422
Akron, Ohio
Originally Posted By: rags57078
Empty nest is a real thing , our kids trapped , hunted and fished with me . I slowed way down on all of it and was lost , I did pick up the fishing game more and trap a bit here and there , as for hunting that is about all gone now


Yeh rags I hear ya. I already told my wife that I might as well sell my bass boat because I just don't think I'll use it much without him and will be lost on it by myself anyway. We used to go down to the cabin and mow, trim and cleanup once every 8-10 days and spend the night and come home the next morning and go to work. He was my shed hunting, mushroom hunting, deer hunting, trapping, turkey hunting, bass fishing partner. This is truly gonna take time and some getting used to, talk about depression.


"The more people I meet the more I love my dog!"
Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: bass10] #6266758
06/25/18 01:42 PM
06/25/18 01:42 PM
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 697
Jackson Co, KS
N
NEYotetrapper Offline
trapper
NEYotetrapper  Offline
trapper
N

Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 697
Jackson Co, KS
My youngest will be moving 2 hrs away come August to go college. My daughter is 3.5 hrs away. Aint gonna lie, IT SUCKS! On the other hand you know you raised a good kid(s) when you miss them. I am blessed to know that I miss my kids when they are not here.

Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: bass10] #6266765
06/25/18 01:54 PM
06/25/18 01:54 PM
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 9,294
Northern MN
O
Osky Offline
trapper
Osky  Offline
trapper
O

Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 9,294
Northern MN
The hurt never goes away, it tempers but its always there. Those two mohicans of mine both went to college in Utah, now you won't get them outta those mountains with dynamite. I appreciate that.
They are both tall, straight honest god fearing young men who are very well liked and leave a trail of friends and good memories wherever they go. Thank heavens for their mother.
Hard hearted curmudgeon that I am I hardly notice them gone at all these days except every 5 minutes or so.
You'll be fine.

Osky


"A womans heart is the hardest rock the Almighty has put on this earth, and I can find no sign on it"

Jabless in Minnesota

www.SureDockusa.com
Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: bass10] #6266768
06/25/18 02:02 PM
06/25/18 02:02 PM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,422
Akron, Ohio
bass10 Offline OP
trapper
bass10  Offline OP
trapper

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,422
Akron, Ohio
Thanks Osky you didn't help one single bit, lol.


"The more people I meet the more I love my dog!"
Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: bass10] #6266773
06/25/18 02:06 PM
06/25/18 02:06 PM
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 4,822
Nevada
N
nvwrangler Online content
trapper
nvwrangler  Online Content
trapper
N

Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 4,822
Nevada
As I read this it brought up a lot of different feelings for me, I was thinking how you raised a man that you could be proud to call your son and lucky that he is that close. I've got 3 kids that are all grown up and are out on their own and couldn't be prouder of them. I may only get a weekly text or call depending on the child and where life has taken them but they all tell me they thing they remember most about growing up was the time we spent together hunting and working livestock, and now that they are through college and have started to settle into their careers how much they are looking forward to those trips again. Heck it won't be long and you'll have the fun of sharing the outdoors and spoiling grandkids, in the mean time go fish and take that kid down the block and the elderly guy from church and pass it on.

Sounds like you did a great job as a father!!!!

Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: bass10] #6266783
06/25/18 02:25 PM
06/25/18 02:25 PM
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 10,308
MT
S
snowy Offline
trapper
snowy  Offline
trapper
S

Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 10,308
MT
I been there and been through it as well. It was one of the hardest things I ever did when we dropped my son off at college. He cried we cried but it is the way of life. Now I know how my parents must have felt.

We as parents give our children their wings then we need to let them spread those wings and let them fly. Not easy. LOL

Last edited by snowy; 06/25/18 06:38 PM.

Give me a fish, I will eat for a day. Teach me to fish, I will eat for a lifetime
Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: bass10] #6266784
06/25/18 02:31 PM
06/25/18 02:31 PM
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 34,751
Central, SD
Law Dog Offline
trapper
Law Dog  Offline
trapper

Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 34,751
Central, SD
Just the way that they learn to toughen up for the life ahead, a easy life never teaches a young person anything about what's ahead of them. We won't be around forever to make it all right for them, they need to learn the skills to make their own choices~


Was born in a Big City Will die in the Country OK with that!

Jerry Herbst
Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: bass10] #6266798
06/25/18 02:51 PM
06/25/18 02:51 PM
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 141
east smithfield pa
M
mikeinpa Offline
trapper
mikeinpa  Offline
trapper
M

Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 141
east smithfield pa
It seemed to hurt more with the first one for me. One thing that makes it a little easier is when you do see each other you’ll be able to set aside the small stuff and concentrate on enjoying your time. I don’t have any negative encounters anymore as I’m happy to see them. It’s not much, but it is a bright side to look at. Man,as I turn more and more into my own parents,it makes me think how little I understood about life back when that kid was me.

Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: bass10] #6266848
06/25/18 04:29 PM
06/25/18 04:29 PM
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 18,371
Green County Wisconsin
G
GREENCOUNTYPETE Online content
trapper
GREENCOUNTYPETE  Online Content
trapper
G

Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 18,371
Green County Wisconsin
I know about 20 years ago my dad was dealing with the adjustment to having married son who didn't come home and go fishing as regular.

I moved away for school when I was 17 but was about 90 minutes away and made it home 3/4 of the weekends.then when I was 20 I met my wife and we used to make it back about once a month, now with 3 teens of my own it isn't as often.

my parents are about 90 minutes away.

call and talk , schedule something maybe fishing on the Ohio that looks about half way.

we found a bunch of places to meet about half way.

Last edited by GREENCOUNTYPETE; 06/25/18 04:32 PM.

America only has one issue, we have a Responsibility crisis and everything else stems from it.
Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: bass10] #6266855
06/25/18 04:40 PM
06/25/18 04:40 PM
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 578
Wisconsin
V
virgil1972 Offline
trapper
virgil1972  Offline
trapper
V

Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 578
Wisconsin
My mom said my dad also had a hard time when I moved out and I work for him, so still see him all the time.

Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: rags57078] #6266867
06/25/18 05:08 PM
06/25/18 05:08 PM
Joined: Nov 2015
Posts: 16,951
OH
Catch22 Offline
trapper
Catch22  Offline
trapper

Joined: Nov 2015
Posts: 16,951
OH
Originally Posted By: rags57078
Empty nest is a real thing , our kids trapped , hunted and fished with me . I slowed way down on all of it and was lost , I did pick up the fishing game more and trap a bit here and there , as for hunting that is about all gone now

Yes it is, and not just for Mama's too. Heck when mine left I didn't know whether to scratch my watch or wind my arse. It took a spell but we all adapted. Phone calls, text, that face time thing etc. And we get together when we can. Bass, you'll go thru a rough patch but don't let it last long. Get out there by yourself and enjoy being out there. You can meet new people and make friends that you can hunt and fish with. And heck, 90 min away is a 45 min drive to meet in the middle for supper!


I wonder if tap dancers walk into a room, look at the floor, and think, I'd tap that. I wonder about things.....
Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: bass10] #6266875
06/25/18 05:22 PM
06/25/18 05:22 PM
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,135
PA
W
walkingstick2 Offline
trapper
walkingstick2  Offline
trapper
W

Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,135
PA
went through the empty nest syndrome with my wife. We had five children spread out over many years as we had the last boy when we were forty but the empty nest still hit us as the home became a house. Having two living within a half hour helped as my grand kids took up hunting, fishing and trapping with grand dad and still do. Holidays are spectacular when they are all together at home but they do grow up and move away.


Although I have trapped over 50 years without a partner I am never alone...God and my Dad are always there with me.
Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: bass10] #6266904
06/25/18 06:23 PM
06/25/18 06:23 PM
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 3,660
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Tweed Offline
trapper
Tweed  Offline
trapper

Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 3,660
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
My dear mother was a single mother and hard as nails. Always talked about me moving out and getting a job...couldnt wait till I turned 18. She was never mean though.

So a few montha after turning 18 I thought I was doing her a favor by getting my own place. She came home from work that afternoon and I casually mwntuoned to her that I found an apartment amd will be moving out the next week. Never seen her cry so much....

Last edited by Tweed; 06/25/18 06:25 PM.
Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: Tweed] #6266908
06/25/18 06:28 PM
06/25/18 06:28 PM
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 3,660
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Tweed Offline
trapper
Tweed  Offline
trapper

Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 3,660
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Originally Posted By: Tweed
My dear mother was a single mother and hard as nails. Always talked about me moving out and getting a job...couldnt wait till I turned 18. She was never mean though.

So a few montha after turning 18 I thought I was doing her a favor by getting my own place. She came home from work that afternoon and I casually mwntuoned to her that I found an apartment amd will be moving out the next week. Never seen her cry so much....


I should also mention a few months later I could tell she was suffering from empty nest. I gave her a bit of a hard time about getting a life and find something that she loves to do. We always had dogs, so she got into agility and field trials and is happy and more content as ever.

Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: bass10] #6266953
06/25/18 07:32 PM
06/25/18 07:32 PM
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 29,750
williamsburg ks
D
danny clifton Offline
"Grumpy Old Man"
danny clifton  Offline
"Grumpy Old Man"
D

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 29,750
williamsburg ks
Son went in the marine corps right out of high school in 2001. Moved back here a year and a half ago. Was a long 16 years.


Those who would give up essential liberty, to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety. Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)
Re: Son moved away and Hurting [Re: bass10] #6266960
06/25/18 07:46 PM
06/25/18 07:46 PM
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 6,501
Wi.
D
Diggerman Offline
trapper
Diggerman  Offline
trapper
D

Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 6,501
Wi.
Loved my kids, but empty nest is, well, awesome.

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