The Man Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

Finally , the guys' side of the story.
( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear " the rules"
From the female side....

Now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "
ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.
(FIRST & FOREMOST RULE)

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.


1. Sunday sports or news, It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.


1.. Crying is blackmail.


1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!


1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.


1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.


1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one


1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it , just do it yourself.


1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..


1. Captain Cook did NOT need directions and neither do we.


1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.


1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.


1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle..


1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.


1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .


1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Football
or Cars.


1. You have enough clothes.


1. You have too many shoes.


1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!


1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;



But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can -
to give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can -

to give them a bigger laugh.

Are you related to Dr, Ruth?

Chris

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

It took me a long time to realise that women, for the most part, just want sympathy, rather than a constructive way to fix their problems.

Keith

That's good Beav!
Thanks for the laughs!

we are trappers,we are going to smell like fur.
if you wanted a man that smelled like roses you shoulda married a florist.

That's just book one in a 40 volume set.

Keith

I've always have heard that rule #2

is always always follow rule #1

In that book, all the pages are blank!

yeah but the women don't know that and have no reason to read it cause they already know it all.

Pretty accurate

I really only agree with rule #1.

Nice

Beav; You need another hobby, besides trapping. Season ends and the BS begins!!!