Anyone getting hit by Chuck Norris has to pack a lunch, because it's a long walk back!!!

Chuck Norris CAN believe its not butter.

Chuck Norris once hit a cyclops between the eyes.

From the "Get Smart movie:

Max finds himself in a warehouse surrounded by KAOS agents. He says, "Right this minute this building is surrounded by 100 SWAT team men with automatic weapons!"

The KAOS leader says, "I don't believe you."

Max says, "Would you believe 10 armed police officers?"

"No."

"How about Chuck Norris with a BB gun?"

When one of his movies was shown at the mall I was at in the early 80's I seen him in person. Also found out years after one of my uncles died from one of my sisters that my uncle was friends with Chuck. That when ever Chuck show up in CA he would stop by at my uncles house. This is not a joke .My sister seen the photos on the wall of my uncle with Chuck.She ask him about it.My uncle is dead now.

Man your a piece of work!! Good one

Chuck Norris carved out the faces on Mount Rushmore on his lunch break.

Oh I like that. We make fun but if it ever happened, my money would be on the Duke, pilgrim!

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack... even a heart isnt foolish enough to attack Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris makes onions cry.

1lessdog, thats a good one!!

Chuck Norris can start a fire by rubbing two ice cubes together.

Where I work, they stock the rest rooms with Chuck Norris toilet paper. Because , just like Chuck, It doesn't take crap off of anybody!

They must stock porta pottys with the Chuck Norris family tree scratch paper in that case. Every trip into one is a horror film, to little pressure and there is the smearing effect. To much and a clean pass thru.

Now I'm dreading monday

I had to dig this thread up, I'm having a Norris battle with my 13 year old son!

Chuck Norris doesn't skin his catches, they jump out of their hide.

These are great.