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Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817751
03/26/20 07:51 AM
03/26/20 07:51 AM
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 6,365
east central WI
K
k snow Offline
trapper
k snow  Offline
trapper
K

Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 6,365
east central WI
Shakin like a dog crappin tacks

Smell bad enough to knock the buzzards of a crap wagon

They weren't PG though, and I got in trouble for repeating them.

Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817753
03/26/20 07:51 AM
03/26/20 07:51 AM
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 862
St. Croix County, Wisconsin
T
ToTheWoods Offline
trapper
ToTheWoods  Offline
trapper
T

Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 862
St. Croix County, Wisconsin
Ain't got the brains god gave a gophers arse

Never bring a sandwich to a buffet

Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817754
03/26/20 07:54 AM
03/26/20 07:54 AM
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 2,324
Hancock Co., Indiana
Kart29 Offline
trapper
Kart29  Offline
trapper

Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 2,324
Hancock Co., Indiana
Ol' Poppie used to say, "it's rainin' pitch forks and n***** babies!"


He also used to tell me to stick the blade of my pocket knife into the ground before cutting any food with it - because the dirt would sterilize the blade.

My other grandfather would say, "A place for everything and everything in its place".

Both of them loved Jesus and followed Him until the day they died. I expect it will be a great joy when I get to worship with them around the throne of the Savior. I hope I have sons and grandsons with me there and then, too.


What from Christ that soul can sever,
Bound by everlasting bands?
None shall take thee
From the Strength of Israel's hands.

Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817758
03/26/20 08:03 AM
03/26/20 08:03 AM
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,517
Nebraska
Trapset Offline
trapper
Trapset  Offline
trapper

Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,517
Nebraska
"Do that one more time and I'm gonna slit your sac and put your foot through it."

Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817775
03/26/20 08:29 AM
03/26/20 08:29 AM
Joined: May 2017
Posts: 1,712
NW Mo
M
Michael Lippold Offline
trapper
Michael Lippold  Offline
trapper
M

Joined: May 2017
Posts: 1,712
NW Mo
Gpa was an onery ol man, and the best man I ever knew! My gpa had many, 2 of my favorites were:

I wish I had that(speaking of a tractor or a truck or something similar) and he had a feather up his arse and then we’d both be tickled

It’s best to keep your mouth shut and be thought a fool, than to open it and remove all doubt!

Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817778
03/26/20 08:38 AM
03/26/20 08:38 AM
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 2,182
Idaville, Indiana
M
MB750 Offline
trapper
MB750  Offline
trapper
M

Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 2,182
Idaville, Indiana
I once hired an old man who I learned to love like he was my Grandpa. Harry came up with several sayings in the several years we wored together.
The one that I remember best & I still use is "To each his own said the old woman as she kissed the cow."


For years I have been tomstrap, now I must change because of the whims of the cyber world. NRA Life, ISTA Life, FTA Life, NTA Life
Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817789
03/26/20 08:47 AM
03/26/20 08:47 AM
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 7,590
SW Pa
B
Bob Jameson Offline
trapper
Bob Jameson  Offline
trapper
B

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 7,590
SW Pa
My dad had some corny sayings I recall over my lifetime.

Three that stand out:

Son you will be a man before your mother is.

When driving past a cemetery dad would say how many people are dead in that graveyard.

Boy if you are going to play with the Owls you gotta fly with the Eagles.

Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817791
03/26/20 08:49 AM
03/26/20 08:49 AM
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 12,986
Central Pennsylvania
Nittany Lion Offline
Don't call me Mister, Mister
Nittany Lion  Offline
Don't call me Mister, Mister

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 12,986
Central Pennsylvania
Hokey Butchermesser.


I got myself a seniors' GPS.
Not only does it tell me how to get to my destination,
it tells me why I wanted to go there.
Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817796
03/26/20 08:54 AM
03/26/20 08:54 AM
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 6,501
Wi.
D
Diggerman Offline
trapper
Diggerman  Offline
trapper
D

Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 6,501
Wi.
He aint never been bit by a sweat bee.

Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817807
03/26/20 09:03 AM
03/26/20 09:03 AM
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 658
Omro, Wisconsin
C
Cooncuff Offline
trapper
Cooncuff  Offline
trapper
C

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 658
Omro, Wisconsin
After passing gas "That's gonna itch when it Dries"


In youth we learn, In age we Understand.
Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817831
03/26/20 09:37 AM
03/26/20 09:37 AM
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 290
Upper Michigan
M
Mack Offline
trapper
Mack  Offline
trapper
M

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 290
Upper Michigan
My grandmother used to say: "I dress for comfort, not speed!"

Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817878
03/26/20 10:29 AM
03/26/20 10:29 AM
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 20,238
The Hill Country of Texas
Leftlane Offline OP
"HOSS"
Leftlane  Offline OP
"HOSS"

Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 20,238
The Hill Country of Texas

Tighter than a bulls butt at fly time
Put a little fur around it.
About a large woman: If she was hauling (This word is unacceptable on Trapperman) she would have to make 2 trips.
& when he saw a woman on a bicycle he would say "She is peddling (This word is unacceptable on Trapperman)"


“What’s good for me may not be good for the weak minded.”
Captain Gus McCrae- Texas Rangers


Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817887
03/26/20 10:33 AM
03/26/20 10:33 AM
Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 1,862
Northeast Wisconsin
N
NE Wildlife Offline
trapper
NE Wildlife  Offline
trapper
N

Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 1,862
Northeast Wisconsin
Ever since I was little when he would have to pee
He would say “I need to go shake hands with the man who
Stood up in my wedding” lol I think I was like 12 before it dawned on me
What he meant.



Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817900
03/26/20 10:48 AM
03/26/20 10:48 AM
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 5,459
Montana
Taximan Offline
trapper
Taximan  Offline
trapper

Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 5,459
Montana
Looking at the empty store shelves yesterday,I was reminded of one that my Grandpap used to say:
"If we had some ham,we could have some ham and eggs..............if we had some eggs! grin

Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817903
03/26/20 10:50 AM
03/26/20 10:50 AM
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 4,100
Bonner County, Idaho
Wild_Idaho Offline
trapper
Wild_Idaho  Offline
trapper

Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 4,100
Bonner County, Idaho
"Better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick"

and many, many lymericks which I cannot repeat here.


Real name Eric
The sharpest hammer in the box of crayons.

Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817920
03/26/20 11:04 AM
03/26/20 11:04 AM
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 2,059
Ames, IA
MikeTraps2 Offline
trapper
MikeTraps2  Offline
trapper

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 2,059
Ames, IA
Pop - "She had a face that would stop a nine day clock" (no idea what a nine day clock is)\
"If it ain't broke, don't go trying to fix it!"

MomMom - Jurtle it! (when something was stuck like a door, or the faucet leaked,( figured it was jiggle, turn, twist, wiggle all in one)


Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure

Theodore Roosevelt
Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6817927
03/26/20 11:12 AM
03/26/20 11:12 AM
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 743
Ashe co. mountains n.c
trapmando Offline
trapper
trapmando  Offline
trapper

Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 743
Ashe co. mountains n.c
Ain't no fun when the rabbit got the gun


A trap is only a trap if you dont know about it. If you know about it, its a challenge
Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6818008
03/26/20 12:17 PM
03/26/20 12:17 PM
Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 2,892
new york
M
mike mason Offline
trapper
mike mason  Offline
trapper
M

Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 2,892
new york
Marry a girl with a tractor. She is so ugly,she would scare a dog off a gut wagon! You move any slower,we will have to call the undertaker! Neighbor's mother always said,"if you kids don't settle down,I'll punch you blind"

Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: MikeTraps2] #6818030
03/26/20 12:38 PM
03/26/20 12:38 PM
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 3,241
Indiana
K
keystone Offline
trapper
keystone  Offline
trapper
K

Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 3,241
Indiana
Originally Posted by MikeTraps2
Pop - "She had a face that would stop a nine day clock" (no idea what a nine day clock is)\
"If it ain't broke, don't go trying to fix it!"

MomMom - Jurtle it! (when something was stuck like a door, or the faucet leaked,( figured it was jiggle, turn, twist, wiggle all in one)

Originally Posted by MikeTraps2
Pop - "She had a face that would stop a nine day clock" (no idea what a nine day clock is)\
"If it ain't broke, don't go trying to fix it!"

MomMom - Jurtle it! (when something was stuck like a door, or the faucet leaked,( figured it was jiggle, turn, twist, wiggle all in one)


Nine day clock is a clock you’d have to wind every nine days. That is pretty funny!!!

Re: What's the funniest thing Grandpa used to say? [Re: Leftlane] #6818245
03/26/20 04:40 PM
03/26/20 04:40 PM
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 520
UP of Michigan
B
billy Offline
trapper
billy  Offline
trapper
B

Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 520
UP of Michigan
its (This word is unacceptable on Trapperman) to get old and if you live long enough you will see it all.


Billy
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