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Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: asphalttrapper] #6931246
07/16/20 07:06 AM
07/16/20 07:06 AM
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 974
Goldsboro, NC
John C Offline
trapper
John C  Offline
trapper

Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 974
Goldsboro, NC
[/quote]

Hahaha... and my Son was still a teen..... so 4 teens (and a Wife)
They would not call me a saint though during that time.
[/quote]

Probably wouldn't call you sane either during that time.


More Cowbell
Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: HobbieTrapper] #6931250
07/16/20 07:12 AM
07/16/20 07:12 AM
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 42,085
Minnesota
330-Trapper Offline
trapper
330-Trapper  Offline
trapper

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 42,085
Minnesota
Originally Posted by HobbieTrapper
Itís already been said but if you have raised her in a loving environment where she got to see how a woman should be treated and what a relationship looks like, you wonít have a lot to worry about.

Unless Nature takes over

....that's the Trump card... but alas- Grandkids smooth things over

Last edited by 330-Trapper; 07/16/20 07:13 AM.

NRA and NTA Life Member
www.BackroadsRevised@etsy.com




Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: asphalttrapper] #6931255
07/16/20 07:16 AM
07/16/20 07:16 AM
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 3,498
central arkansas
T
the Blak Spot Offline
trapper
the Blak Spot  Offline
trapper
T

Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 3,498
central arkansas
If they're not old enough to marry, they're not old enough to date


the just shall live by faith

member FTA, NRA, SWARFTA, EAFT
1776 - the year we told a tyrant we weren't to be under a dictator
Caveat ater macula
Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: the Blak Spot] #6931261
07/16/20 07:24 AM
07/16/20 07:24 AM
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 42,085
Minnesota
330-Trapper Offline
trapper
330-Trapper  Offline
trapper

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 42,085
Minnesota
Originally Posted by the Blak Spot
If they're not old enough to marry, they're not old enough to date

They might move to a different marrying (sp.?) Age State.


NRA and NTA Life Member
www.BackroadsRevised@etsy.com




Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: asphalttrapper] #6931270
07/16/20 07:31 AM
07/16/20 07:31 AM
Joined: Nov 2018
Posts: 408
Ontario
S
Saskfly Offline
trapper
Saskfly  Offline
trapper
S

Joined: Nov 2018
Posts: 408
Ontario
Originally Posted by asphalttrapper
Our Daughter is a very bright , kind and caring young lady. She is very open with her mother and I . The boy came by to meet us last weekend he is 16 . He was very polite and talkative . He holds a couple of jobs and likes hunting and fishing.
He wants to come over this weekend again and my daughter wants to watch movies in the basement instead of in the living room with the rest of the family. I don't know if I'm ready for that.


Sounds like a nice young man, better watching movies in the basement than out somewhere else. Between brining them some popcorn, re-setting the fuse, (any siblings you can send down?), you should be able to be down there fairly often. Just saying...

Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: asphalttrapper] #6931285
07/16/20 07:39 AM
07/16/20 07:39 AM
Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 7,130
On Georgian Bay, Ontario Canad...
H
Hutchy Offline
trapper
Hutchy  Offline
trapper
H

Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 7,130
On Georgian Bay, Ontario Canad...
I am 35 and up until 4 years ago was still chasing girls.

I will tell ya, parents be darned...if they are to stay out of trouble, there is nothing you can do at the time to keep them out of it. What you had to do was the years leading up to it to ensure they can stay out of trouble themselves.

That said, I was certainly not "trouble" in the eyes of any of the parents of the girls I was with in the past and all of the ones I met were happy to chat, and supported their daughters decisions. Parents liked me. To be honest, I think the "cleaning the shotgun when you first meet them" approach is a bit old, cliche, and "fudd ish" but that's not to say your reputation shouldn't precede you. I dated cops daughters, conservation officers daughters, and am friends with all the parents even still.

If you don't like the person, tell them them your point of view, tell her the guys is trouble and leave it at that. If the guy is bad enough he needs to be taken care of, do like an older french friend of mine did to a seriously bad apple his daughter was seeing...

"One day the guy just fell down the stairs and ended up in the hospital. And he never came around any more".

Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: asphalttrapper] #6931287
07/16/20 07:42 AM
07/16/20 07:42 AM
Joined: Dec 2017
Posts: 3,744
Kansas
Pawnee Offline
trapper
Pawnee  Offline
trapper

Joined: Dec 2017
Posts: 3,744
Kansas
I have 4 boys so I have no personal experience, but I have heard some great programs on Focus on the family about father/daughter relationships and dating Lots of resources on there website. Good luck


Everything the left touches it destroys
Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: Saskfly] #6931298
07/16/20 07:46 AM
07/16/20 07:46 AM
Joined: Oct 2018
Posts: 4,470
Dunbar, Wisconsin
P
Pike River Offline
trapper
Pike River  Offline
trapper
P

Joined: Oct 2018
Posts: 4,470
Dunbar, Wisconsin
Originally Posted by Saskfly
Originally Posted by asphalttrapper
Our Daughter is a very bright , kind and caring young lady. She is very open with her mother and I . The boy came by to meet us last weekend he is 16 . He was very polite and talkative . He holds a couple of jobs and likes hunting and fishing.
He wants to come over this weekend again and my daughter wants to watch movies in the basement instead of in the living room with the rest of the family. I don't know if I'm ready for that.


Sounds like a nice young man, better watching movies in the basement than out somewhere else. Between brining them some popcorn, re-setting the fuse, (any siblings you can send down?), you should be able to be down there fairly often. Just saying...


And remove all blankets and coverings! I cant begin to remember all the times I was innocently in that scenario and the girl wanted to get frisky and risky while sitting with a blanket while family was there.

Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: Hutchy] #6931306
07/16/20 07:55 AM
07/16/20 07:55 AM
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 3,148
Maine
M
Mac Offline
trapper
Mac  Offline
trapper
M

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 3,148
Maine
Alert, this is not first hand experience. I worked with a wise older carpenter many years ago that was kind enough to share his experience while we were eating lunch one day.
This older carpenter had a young teenage daughter that was starting to date. As I said, we were sitting around eating our lunch on a hot, humid, August day. One of the younger workers on the crew though he would tease the guy about his daughter about being at the age where she was starting to date.
The older guy, with out missing a beat, while polishing off a sandwich told us his secret.
He said he had not worried a bit since he started putting birth control pills into his daughters Cheerios. That got everyone roaring with laughter.



Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: asphalttrapper] #6931308
07/16/20 07:57 AM
07/16/20 07:57 AM
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 2,576
Oklahoma
Blaine County Offline
trapper
Blaine County  Offline
trapper

Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 2,576
Oklahoma
The solution is to deal with it long before dating is an issue.

Raise strong independent girls. Teach them to be assertive. Give them lots of responsibility and trust them to handle it. Be a good dad because that lays the groundwork for the type of boys/men they will want to date/marry.

16 was/is our rule. I meet the boy and we have a friendly but firm talk. I try to time this so I am working in my shop. If my words aren't enough, the many implements of death and destruction there get my point across.

No real problems yet.


MOLON LABE
Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: asphalttrapper] #6931314
07/16/20 08:06 AM
07/16/20 08:06 AM
Joined: May 2018
Posts: 154
West coast Wisconsin
50fps Offline
trapper
50fps  Offline
trapper

Joined: May 2018
Posts: 154
West coast Wisconsin
If I remember correctly, we had a 10% pregnancy rate in my class going through HS.

Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: asphalttrapper] #6931315
07/16/20 08:08 AM
07/16/20 08:08 AM
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 1,986
Shenandoah County, VA
L
l1ranger Offline
trapper
l1ranger  Offline
trapper
L

Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 1,986
Shenandoah County, VA
we have two, 17 and 20.
neither "dated" anybody that could drive before they could.
at 15 3/4, I'd probably have been okay with them going on a date. prior to that, a movie or dinner was okay with a parent driving/dropping off. a parent or two would usually stay for the movie.

to me, it's important that they have/had certain freedoms and responsibilities before they were turned loose into the "real world".
We try to keep open communication with them, but they know that we are their parent first, and their friend second.
they also know that if they are in a bad situation, even if it is of their own making, we will help them out of it


Josh
Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: asphalttrapper] #6931319
07/16/20 08:16 AM
07/16/20 08:16 AM
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 2,703
Northern Minnesota
BernieB. Offline
trapper
BernieB.  Offline
trapper

Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 2,703
Northern Minnesota
If you have brought her up right, She can take care of herself at 16, and she'll do a good job of sorting out the guys.

Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: asphalttrapper] #6931323
07/16/20 08:24 AM
07/16/20 08:24 AM
Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 2,593
7mtns of CENTRAL PA
GROUSEWIT Offline
trapper
GROUSEWIT  Offline
trapper

Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 2,593
7mtns of CENTRAL PA
Originally Posted by asphalttrapper
Our Daughter is a very bright , kind and caring young lady. She is very open with her mother and I . The boy came by to meet us last weekend he is 16 . He was very polite and talkative . He holds a couple of jobs and likes hunting and fishing.
He wants to come over this weekend again and my daughter wants to watch movies in the basement instead of in the living room with the rest of the family. I don't know if I'm ready for that.


Yep right out of my play book almost 50 yrs ago!!! Your bringing back the memories!!!


NRALIFER,HUNTER,FURTAKER(PTA)(FTA)(NMTA)(RMEF)
Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: HobbieTrapper] #6931325
07/16/20 08:25 AM
07/16/20 08:25 AM
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 4,818
Wi.
D
Diggerman Offline
trapper
Diggerman  Offline
trapper
D

Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 4,818
Wi.
Originally Posted by HobbieTrapper
It’s already been said but if you have raised her in a loving environment where she got to see how a woman should be treated and what a relationship looks like, you won’t have a lot to worry about.

This, by the time they date, they should already know how a girl should be treated. That said, you have absolutely no power over whom she brings home, you can only hope for the best. Also first impressions are important. If he walks into a house where trust and obedience are the rule of the day, that will shape his behavior .
On a side note, a friend of mine had a young man ask once if he could sleep over, I believe his reply was " Sure, but your sleepin with ME".

Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: asphalttrapper] #6931338
07/16/20 08:50 AM
07/16/20 08:50 AM
Joined: Jan 2018
Posts: 402
Alabama
K
KB64 Offline
trapper
KB64  Offline
trapper
K

Joined: Jan 2018
Posts: 402
Alabama
Have a soon to be 19 year old daughter. You've got to show them that you trust them and give them some freedom within accepted boundaries. I compare it to a dog that's kept in a pen 24/7, if you open the gate you'll have a hard time catching them. However, social evil, I mean social media, is trouble. You need the password to all social media accounts and randomly check them. Don't forget that some gaming systems can access the internet.

Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: asphalttrapper] #6931339
07/16/20 08:53 AM
07/16/20 08:53 AM
Joined: Mar 2012
Posts: 2,727
meadowview, Virginia
E
EdP Offline
trapper
EdP  Offline
trapper
E

Joined: Mar 2012
Posts: 2,727
meadowview, Virginia
Let them watch movies where ever they want. They want to be able to be themselves without being in the "public eye." That's just natural, but the door is always open. Pick your battles. They will have plenty of opportunities to do things you don't want going on unless you lock her up, and even then if they are serious about it they will find a way. The more freedom you can give the better. There is a reason the preacher's daughter is always the wildest gal in town.

Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: asphalttrapper] #6931422
07/16/20 10:35 AM
07/16/20 10:35 AM
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 526
Arizona
O
oldtrapper Offline
trapper
oldtrapper  Offline
trapper
O

Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 526
Arizona
Originally Posted by asphalttrapper
I have a 15 and 3/4 year old daughter and the boys are starting to come calling. My question is at what age did you let your daughters date? What should I look out for?

We always said 35 is a good age... Honestly there's nothing you can do now, but hope for the best. You could do what I did to chase off my wife's boy friends... I just gave them a good handshake, and they never came back . But it's your daughter so that isn't a good idea. My daughter turned 19 this year and has her first boyfriend... It's kinda funny her boyfriend hasn't gotten close enough to shake my hand yet... hmmm. How did we do It? I have no idea. The only thing I can think of is that she was home schooled, took horse riding lessons, went fishing, target shooting, hunting, and trapping... she got her trappers certification when she was 12. She won a trap setting contest the same year at the Arizona's Trappers Association rendezvous, I feel bad for all them farm boy's who got whooped. Kepp her busy. What to look out for? Gray hair in the mirror.

Good Luck

Oldtrapper

Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: asphalttrapper] #6931533
07/16/20 12:27 PM
07/16/20 12:27 PM
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 2,756
Oklahoma
M
Matt28 Offline
trapper
Matt28  Offline
trapper
M

Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 2,756
Oklahoma
Well good luck hope it works out. I guess I am so scared that my daughter will find someone like me. I will die or go to prison before I let that happen. Its not hard to talk a good girl in to being a bad one. I think the friends that a girl has says alot about how she will act. Girls are very easy to influence.

Re: Help! Dads with teenage daughters. [Re: asphalttrapper] #6931555
07/16/20 12:56 PM
07/16/20 12:56 PM
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 1,287
IA
T
teepee2 Offline
trapper
teepee2  Offline
trapper
T

Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 1,287
IA
Just remember you are as dumb as you will ever be when your daughter is a teenager. You will get smarter as she grows older. laugh

Last edited by teepee2; 07/16/20 12:56 PM.
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