The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise for answered prayers.
Suzie Smith stood and walked to the podium. She said, "I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband, Tom, had a terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could help him."
You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation as they imagine the pain that poor Tom must have experienced.
"Tom was unable to hold me or the children," she went on, "and every move caused him terrible pain." We prayed as the doctors performed a delicate operation, and it turned out they were able to piece together the crushed remnants of Tom's scrotum, and wrap wire around it to hold it in place."
Again, the men in the congregation cringed and squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined the horrible surgery performed on Tom.
"Now," she announced in a quivering voice, "thank the Lord, Tom is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with time, his scrotum should recover completely."
All the men sighed with unified relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone else had something to say.
A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium. He said, "I'm Tom Smith."
The entire congregation held its breath.
"I just want to tell my wife the word is sternum."

Thanks, rags.


True story:

One day, years ago, I was waiting in line at a Wal Mart checkout, behind a couple, and the wife's mother. I asked the guy, who was wearing sling on his left arm, what happened to him. The 'Mother-in-law' piped up and said " He tore his Labia.".

The guy turned to her and said "Labrum, I tore my Labrum.".




Charlie

Both are funny maybe the MIL meant what she said

LOL,,when I was like 16 years old,,I contracted triple E (Eastern Equine Encephalitis) the mosquito disease.Put me an a coma for a week.Neighbor lady says to my Dad,,Whats wrong with young Tony,,I heard hes in the hospital.Dad says yea,,he has Encephalitis.She says,,OH,,well don't be too mad at him,,all the young kids are getting that these days.HAhahaaaaa (this was in the mid 1970s) True story.

Thanks fella's, I needed that this morning.

Haha, awesome!

Good one, Rags!

Good add on jokes guys LOL

Mine wasn't a joke,,,true story.

Mine too. Happened a few years ago at the Lexington, NE. Wally-world.

I don't shop there anymore, because of the Somalis, and the 'one-way' security gates at the entrances.



Charlie

Ok sorry true stories

great one's guys ,thanks I needed a laugh

Garry-