My father died about two years ago. Although his body a physical presents lives on. He (I hope and pray) is in the final stages of dementia. I pray every night that the good Lord will just take him. He is destroying my mother to which he no longer even knows. He knows no one now. Not me, not my siblings, not my mother, not long time friends...... nobody. He has lost control of his bladder and worse. He has used different parts of the house as a bathroom during the night. He is argumentative, hostile and starting to become physically abusive. My mother is scared and locks herself in a room at night so she can sleep. She is trying to find a home for him since she is unable to provide the amount of care he needs but cannot and covid has made everything 10 times worse. He is now under 115 pounds and will only eat when he wants too. I think the end is near and to be honest I pray for it. What a horrible demise. It takes everything from you. Your person, your memories, your dignity. Is it evil for me to hope that God takes him? Thanks for letting me vent and I ask you to pray for a swift end to this torture of my family.

Its not evil at all Finster. When there is no dignity left, then life is over. I hope he and the rest of your family will find peace soon.

You're simply praying for the suffering to end. I've done it twice myself.

Finster
Have you contacted the Division if Aging to see if they can help with placement and assist your mother as well.

Prayers sent for you and your family Sir.


B

Not evil at all. Job wished for his own death when he went through his suffering. That's a terrible thing to see happen, I think my wife's grandmother and s just starting down that path. Praying for you.

Yes, we have contacted many government agencies and "shockingly" they all punt the ball to someone else. Government is useless even when you are dying.

A lot of us have been through it. I watched my Father go through something similar , After he ended up in a Nursing home due to a Stroke. In some ways, I think it is harder on the family members , than the person that is living with it

Been there with my Mom. Praying.

God Bless.That is terrible that you cant find professional care for him.
My father went thru it and eventually passed from it.We tried to look after him as long as possible at home,but it became impossible because of his tendency to wander and also get agressive.We got him referred by our family doctor for long term care-then he got placement in a nice nursing home where everything was looked after for him and he had a nice apartment there.
Then near the end our doctor brought him back to the LTC in the hospital where he eventually passed in comfort.
It is a terrible disease,cant imagine the toll on your family without professional support.

Try to get Hospice to come make calls or get him to a care unit. They like to start the morphine shots and it's soon over. Both of my parents were OD'd on morphine. Not that it's a bad thing, because it does put an end to suffering.

Prayers sent man.

Finster

You are not evil. This very hard on all around him, you know he is not himself. Use every available resource for the aged. If he is a danger to himself or your mother there has to be an agency that needs to know that now.

Correct Gary that is how my father passed once it had progressed too far along..we were all by his side.
Talk to your family doctor,Finster.

Went through the same thing. Mom was the one with dementia. Dad took care of her as long as he could then she was in a nursing home. She ended up outliving Dad by 8 months. I spent the first 2 years of my retirement dealing with Dad's cancer and watching him die. Listened to him pray out loud for God to take him and mad as heck that God wouldn't listen. Got a call ar 5 am that Mom wasn't doing well. Before I could get dressed and out the door they called and she was gone. It was like the weight of the world was off my shoulders. I was happy that she had died. I guess the point of this is I don't think you're evil praying your Dad passes.

Sounds like the end is near. I feel for you and your family since I went through this with my father. We were lucky to have been able to place him in a home. He recognized no one and it was horrible to watch his slow deterioration. I also recently lost a good friend to dementia. Prayers to all involved.

Been there a couple of times myself.

Nothing evil what so ever, nothing to feel guilty about.

Strength and prayers sent you way.

God Bless You

WS

Quite often death is a form of healing, not only for the afflicted one but for the family as well. Been down the same road you are on now, it is very difficult. Just remember.....this too will pass.

Not evil at all. 2 years ago, I sat with my grandmother and we spoke a prayer that the good Lord would remove my grandfather from his "prison". He was in the next room napping. He was in a similar state to what you are describing. Absolutely heartbreaking....

I will pray immediately for both of you.

I've been through the same thing with my parents.
I'll be keeping you all in my prayers...