True and the more you learn the more you realize you know nothing.

Some times it all turns out pretty good, though. I started dating a girl that has a lot of my interests and perspectives and we had a lot of fun. Still with that girl I started dating 45 years ago.

Moosetrot

As we all can see you have taken the bait and ur not listening, thats normal, so lets get down to brass tacks, how much money has she got, including property (hunting and trapping grounds: 4 wheel drive pick up and does she have a boat with motor): next you need a pre nup: that means whats yours is yours and whats hers is yours if you want it, not the other way around, including the possum. One other item, seeing how you are smitten by the kitten, you better watch out for a pot with potions and such (and we are not talking about making coyote lure here), we do not want a Hansel and Grettle thing going on or your face on a milk carton if you disappear. Put her in the water and see if she floats or sinks, (one of the two) and go check out that broom in the corner and if she watches you like a hawk when you sweep the porch trade it in on a vaccum. oh yeah and get some silver water and see if it glows. Remember Swamp woods magic can be usefull and good, but if she starts pulling hair off you on the night before a full moon, your days of howling at it might just be changing. Watch out for that Mandrake root. Bubble Bubble boil and trouble, collect the hair from wolfies facial stuble, put in the pot and stir it a lot (this is the part where they laugh heheheheh) and when full is the moon wolfiie will howl a different tune; well you get the rest, keep grinnin like that possum.

I tell all the young guys,,, get her vet checked, get a financial statement, and a criminal record report! might want to get a psych eval too, especially if she's a red head...

After that whatever you decide is on you....

Time for the hot crazy matrix refresh course

I told/taught my boys ALL women are crazy, you just find the level of crazy you can live with and marry that one.

All imma say is apparently she's know about voodoo and I'm not eating her spaghetti

Well she's former LEO so back ground checks out she's a head strong heffier though

Maybe she musta put put a Hex on yo a$$. For a solution, listen to Richard Pryor's "Little Feets" about MS. Rudolph. . . then you'll be ok.

"Former LEO"? Is she retired or did she get kicked out? Kicked out means something ain't right. Retired? You said she was a little older than you, but I don't think we thought she was THAT much older. She will have you changing the battery on her little rascal soon. Sounds like she is a little old to be a heifer. I think it is too late for us to save you, you're like a hog-tied calf now.
Joking aside, I wish you the best of luck, Eric

If she finds out that he called her a heifer, we may never hear from Wolfie again. RIP young man.