I've had to deal with more of it than I ever expected. I've lost both parents, 2 sisters and a brother along with numerous aunts and uncles. I'm glad I can help out. If I recall when my last sister passed a few years back, it saved over 2K bypassing the funeral home.

LifeQuest Anatomical

www.lifequest-anatomical.com

You can honor his wishes and still honor him by honoring his wishes.

I went a different route. My lawyer took care of everything. When my mom was alive he had an interview with her. He asked questions that I did not have the nerve to ask and made all the arraignments before she died. She was very happy with the knowledge of what was going to happen. She was dying that horrible hospital death that my best friend and father and mother died from, in bed for months with people gaping at them. When the time came it was done, there was a slight bo bo at the cemetary end but no one but me noticed it........very grateful to my lawyer and not expensive as my mother wished......jk

Why is money a major theme during end of life? Is that what a lifetime with a loved one boils down too?

Mark,I think it's about the money for some people who feels like throwing away 3 to 10k away.Respect the person that has gone on to a better place.There is nothing wrong with spending thousand's on a funeral if that's what you or your family wants to do.To some people it ads more hardships on people that do not have 5k or so for the final send off from this earth.

Good points Rick. As a person who ministers to people who struggle with all sorts of shame, guilt, and unhealthy memories related to people's deaths in their lives, I just wondered why so many of the comments were related to cash.

I'd argue that people spend cash on the things they want. Trucks. Houses. Boats. Guns. Dance lessons. Dish TV. We are a nation of "spenders."
I also know from supporting some 150 deaths and the families involved that it's not funeral directors they don't want to spend the money with. Nope. It's death.
It's not about the money you see, it's about the frame of mind of those in charge of the end of life decisions.
Example: Just had a family arguing (it's why the gravely ill don't want a wake... avoid all the drama many times) over the money one of the men didn't want to spend for the mom's end of life situation but he had just dropped $350,000 on a sail boat.
You see, we place our $$$ where our heart's desires are.

If you want to save money on an end of life situation, then do what our ancestors did before about 1880. Prep and bury your loved one yourself. Do all of it. End to end.
But nope, because starting about 150 years ago we as a progressive people decided to give "undertakers" the duties we no longer wanted to do which now has evolved via culture sentiment and legislation into funeral homes/directors.
I'm not advocating for funeral homes - not my mission.
My wonderment is that a death memorial should honor the deceased. Does it or will it? If so, there will much better healthy grieving for all involved and if not there's a good chance unhealthy grieving will occur and doc's will Rx more meds.
That's the people I support who will not remember a dollar here or a dollar there in five years but will always remember the intent of those involved at end of life.
Dollars come and go. Emotions seem to live a long, long, long time.

You rarely had anyone 150 years ago say, "I don't want a funeral or a memorial when I die." Did not happen. And the family would have been shocked to hear such a request.
But this is a common request in 2021.
We have changed as a nation these last 100 years and having less reverence for those who die is not a good path. At so many levels.

Blessings,
Mark

Good stuff Mark, thanks.

Its illegal to do it yourself.

If turning a loved one into a mummy is what you want whos to say different? In 3 thousand years they will be digging them up the way we do Egyptian mummy's and putting their jewelry in museums.

Pretty wrong to chastise people who dont want their loved ones remains preserved at enormous cost.