Child raising methods today.

The 4-5 year olds are running the show my God it looks like a terrorist negotiation going on and the kid is allowed to win and always gets what they wanted in the first place or the parents make all of the concessions not the kids. One pile of food the good stuff “real food” must be rewarded with disguised junk foods to get them to comply (the kids control it). No hands on today just talk, talk, talk until the parent is wore down, the kids have all day. LOL In my day you ate what was made or went without on a good day.

Ipads at the table during meals if you did dare not take them away it would be war then, just a electronic babysitter nothing more. Today’s kids know so much but don’t go outside or are afraid to do so. The parents are proud of what the iPads have taught the kids yet the parents are raising kids with few guidelines to deal with life when the time comes. The parents will give the kids what ever they demand but will the rest of the world be as accommodating to them later in life?

Look, another “Back in my day” thread. Very original.

Lawdog, I have a great friend outside of Colo Springs and I got to spend some time with him and his family last year. His wife has convinced him that the no spanking talk to your child BS works and his 5 year old son is completely out of control.

My fear is this, if you can't even get a handle on a kid at 5 what do you expect from him when he is 15?

Most people don't know this, but you can actually scroll right past a post if it is not your thing. Shocked?

You don’t like my posts don’t open them all you do is run your mouth on here you must have a crappy life oh well.

That crap dont fly in my house. Corperal punishment still works. Thats why my kid is loved everywhere he goes. Manners and straight A"s in school. Doesnt use tablet only at school. Future Doctor or engineer here! Plus he has chores and loves to help. Today he helped replace pressure switch on well and after dinner he will help replace belt on tractor. Loves work.

How will this up coming generation be able to handle life’s problems when they arise is my concern with lacking such skills that were never taught to them?

Kids yearn for discipline. My wife use to have a daycare. She had activities for the kids to do and made them mind. No TV on. Many of the kids she watched, give her a big hug when they see her. Many are in the 20’s.

Worked with kids for years they had no respect for the “easy” staff but respected the fair but firm ones. You want to know about a kids life just sit and really listen not much they won’t tell you.

I watched my friends 4 year old walk up and punch my friend in the sack, the kid then ran to his momma and no discipline was handed out at all other than a quick talk about how "you gotta quit doing that".

Spare the rod and spoil the child...
Who said that ???

It comes from this verse
“He who spares his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him promptly.”
Proverbs 13:24 NKJV
It was never actually in the Bible but rather something started in the 1600s

I still wouldn’t be able to sit

Nothing harder then to listen to the a parent begging a child to do what needs to be done anyway after the fifth pretty please I’m about to lose it time to walk away. LOL

These younguns here know two levels of correction. Daddy Mac will ask you to take a minute and think about it and blister that arse. Your choice.

Drop kick that little crap head 1/2 way across the county! Followed by the parents.

One of the best horse trainers and a life mentor to me said you should always handle kids like you would a green horse. First suggest what you want them to do. If that doesn't mind, up it to a request. If they are actively ignoring a request (that they understand), then you demand it.

We have a 36 year old daughter with a 16 and 14 year old. Very good kids. Respectful, excellent manners, good students. She has a boyfriend with a 9 and 6 year old. The boy, 9, loves to fish and when he does doesn't care who is in his way. Doesn't pay attention when casting. Snagged his little sister in the head bad enough she had to go to the ER. They told him he had to take a break from fishing till he could control himself. He looked at his sister and said "You (This word is unacceptable on Trapperman) I'm going to hook you again". My 31 year old son said, "Man if I ever said that to my sister I never would have seen your hand coming if I ever said something like that."

I agree with this so much and its so sad/infuriating

I've never really laid a hand on my kids. I think they might prefer that over my "discussions". They are some of the best behaved kids in our circle.

You must be doing something right Pike. To be clear, my boy is 22 and only needed a small handfuls of corporal punishment to keep him on the straight and narrow. Some kids are just good kids and don't need that much 'encouragement'. I see others that probably only need one healthy dose of it and they would probably be cured. Just my thoughts anyway

I might have snapped my boys rod for a comment like that.

Wife and I went out to supper with one of our sons and his fiancé the other evening.Sat us next to a husband ,wife and three kids.The younger kid,,probly three years old,,was banging his spoon on a plate so hard and loud I thought the plate was gonna break.When he wasn't doing that,,he was screaming bloody murder at the top of his lungs.Parents sat talking like nothing was even happening.Waitress came to take our drink order,,and says I will be right back.Manager comes to our table and says its a bit noisy here,,follow me and you will get a new quieter table at the other side of the restaurant.LOL,,Kid didn't need a smack,,,the parents did.

I don't disagree with you even if you are a Texan. As a young man growing up I look back and think of all the times I could've used a punch in the face.


With my girls..... I started even when they were babies. Nipped any bad behavior in the bud. Folks thought I was too strict for babies but now we look back and see the fruitage of our ways.

I'm a "mean dad" to the kids and some parents.
I've had enough with the kids and electronics. Got rid of them. They have "dumb" TVs. I don't cater to every demand or pickyness of eating. I don't spoil them hardly cave to their demands, they eat or don't, they have a bed time even in summer.
Mom is the "fun parent" hahaha. My kids will thank me later

When I was young,,my Dad taught me that time travel was possible.Any time I acted up,,he sent me into the middle of next week !!

If you want to teach your kids or your dog to ignore you, don't expect them to comply the first time you ask them to do something.

Yup! All these parents giving their kids till the count of 5. Nope! This isn't a negotiation, I spoke, you listen. However.. I will give a heads up such as "in x amount of minutes this is happening"

The heads up thing is a good idea and I used that. Another thing we did was use an appeals process. I didn't want to viewed as an ironfisted tyrant so we let the kids give us some additional information on a decision we had made. They would literally ask us if they could appeal a decision. We always let them appeal. Sometimes they won the appeal, sometimes they didn't but it gave them a feeling their input mattered.

Respect and love your kids, they're a precious gift.

Three things to instill in young children from the get-go:
1. It's your house, your rules.
2. You're paying the cost to be the boss
3. . . . and you're a he// of a lot bigger than they are. :-)

I'm going to go against the grain here. I have 5 brothers and sister and we were not spanked. Maybe a pat on the butt to get attention but that was it. All professionals excelling in their fields. All upstanding members of the religious and overall community.

Raised my 3 the same way. My youngest is 18 and we've never even had to deal with a traffic ticket. We were often told how nice and well behaved our kids were/are. Not saying that to brag, I just want to show there is more than one way to do it.

I’d guess the difference would be the electronics today that fill the quality time you spent with your kids and family.

Good point. We had a game console in the living room but even that was done as a family.

Yep and I’ll add. We can be friends when you’re 22 and on your own. I have 4 great God fearing boys. They aren’t perfect but the wife and I have got complaints from age 2 until 20 on how well behaved and polite they are. The devil pads and devil pods are the ruination of the society.

21Evil pursueth sinners: but to the righteous good shall be repayed. 22A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children's children: and the wealth of the sinner is laid up for the just. 23Much food is in the tillage of the poor: but there is that is destroyed for want of judgment. 24He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes. 25The righteous eateth to the satisfying of his soul: but the belly of the wicked shall want.

Just be careful you don't overdo it with the corporal punishment because one day Jr. is gonna be the one with the belt LOL

The "trick" is knowing the difference between corporal punishment and discipline :-)

I am afraid we have a sad generation coming on.

They’ll figure it out when things get tough.

Thirty some years ago I got arrested. Sons 5th grade teacher was having problems with him. Called me litteraly every day. Finally I told him one more time your getting a spanking. She called that day and I touched him up that night. Next day he asked the teacher to please not call me any more. Igot arrested. Had to post a cash bond. Social workers put him in a foster home during the 12 hours I was in jail. Social workers then came out to the house. I told them to leave. So they called and tried blackmail. Said let them come “investigate”, plead guilty in court or I would never see my son. I explained they had my permission to investigate anything they wanted but not on my property and i was done talking to them. Blackmail. Went to court several times. Lawyers kept postponing. (I asked for a public defender. Couldnt see hiring one till i couldnt get out of it). I told him I wanted a jury. He told me to plead guilty. After multiple times of going to court and having it postponed I spoke up. Told the judge I wanted my trial and a jury. At that point it was all dissmissed. Son sure was glad to come home. Had been gone almost three months. People wonder why i lost all respect for judges, lawyers law enforcement and social workers.


There is the number one reason kids are in control of parents

PS. The cash bond I posted was returned as a check. And no interest

Danny it should have been nipped in the butt the first day your son came home.

Well as one infamous woman says "it takes a village to raise a kid" then why should the parent be singled out to go to jail ?

In SD you are allowed to punish your kids as long as it is not abusive.

So define abuse

In KS abuse is leaving a mark that last more than ten seconds. Unless your LE. Then its ok if a 10 year old has bruises on his wrist from being held onto

Excessive treatment but it’s a tricky call spanking a kid by hand VS using a belt. The options would be endless to go through.

All the stuff to improve our society. Letting people steal gas, prohibition, permission required to sell or build or carry or buy, interfering with people raising kids, welfare, on and on and onare exacerbating problems but instead of repealing law we pass more. That Jerry is the reason you see the problem your posting about

The lack of God in the household is one problem. Teach the Ten Commandments. Pretty simple to do.

Training kids is about the same as training dogs and horses, you make that first correction a "memorable" one...I'm not talking a beating, and the earlier you catch it the memorable part doesn't have to be harsh...You can't start light and ramp it up, one and done and you might not need i again...

I used to say something similar and people would get so mad.

Unfortunately...they won't be prepared to deal with life. I believe this is why so many today clamor for every type of handout/program...all they know is that they can get what they want by screaming, etc. It's all good until you're hooked and not self sufficient...then the gubmint is going to fill the void and people will be under oppression like they never knew in their lives. Teach your children well gentlemen, it's our only hope for the future.

Cause "people" are stupid...

Unbelievable! And from a state I watched return a 12 yr old boy with brain damage right back to the scuzzy mother who watched her boyfriend cause the brain injury to her own son and then moved the scumbag in for keeps while her son was still in a hospital. A judge in all of his (infinite wisdom) decided that since the guy had completed anger management classes it would be safe to deliver the poor kid to him again.

LOL. True ^^.

I was once watching a youth soccer game that one of my son's was playing in and there was another family present, sitting right next to us. They had a daughter that was probably about 5 or 6 and she was a major distraction, running onto the field multiple times, screaming, etc, etc. The mother was doing a terrible job of handling this and it went on long enough that other spectators got up and moved well away from the ongoing fracas. My wife wouldn't let me do the same, as our son and the poor mother's son were friends, etc. Harrumph.

Well the mother kept counting to "3" to get the little hellion to comply and would count it out as: "1"...long pause, while the kid kept doing it..."2"...at which point the kid would lock her eyes on mom, but continue to do whatever..."2-1/2"...you're killing me here lady, but the kid kept misbehaving..."2-3/4"...and she would never get to the "3"...and the kid knew it, you could see in her reaction, or lack thereof.

This had happened two or three times and the "1-2-3 Sequence" was again initiated as the little girl was up to no good again. Only this time, once mom paused after "2", I said out loud "3" and started to get up. Amazingly, the kid stopped the shenanigans instantly. I feel sorry for the kid...they will likely struggle all their lives with "mean" bosses, spouses who "don't understand them", etc. It sounds like there are many good dads here on T-Man.

Yep, I agree with most of what's being discussed here. I personally never bought into smacking my kids around, but they knew who the alpha male was in the house. They also knew I loved them. They're all now contributing members of society and raising good families of their own. Maybe we just got lucky.

When you try new stuff looking for improvements that is a good thing. If it doesn’t work the smart person resumes what was working and then perhaps tries something new searching for improvement. You dont keep doing what isn’t working hoping it will somehow start working.

Kids know how to work it they act out with the parents often but if they are not sure of the consequences they toe the line then.

To quote John J. Rambo, the mind is the best weapon. I have never spanked my kids. They are not perfect but they are great kids (human beings, students and athletes). They know I am boss but they know that I will talk and reason with them. Of course, I have wanted to ring their necks a time or two but I did not.

Now, I do wrestle around with each one of them almost daily. It is another form of reason--I want them to know I can win if we went old school. Here's the problem: the 15 year old judo daughter and the 14 year old wrestler son have recently scored a few points on old dad. They didn't win but they are getting cocky. And the 8 year old wrestler son has witnessed this. At least the 18 year old daughter will always come to my defense when I am too feeble to hold the three younger savages off.

Its easy to tell somebody else how to live

Who is telling who how to live?

The problem I see is what’s going to be missing in the future and even now, you can learn about anything on a IPad but lack any personal experience on the subject so you come to conclusions not knowing the real expected outcomes of such decisions will be. That about sums up the West coast with the feel good things they do and ruining everything in the process. Nothing says the info your being fed it real now or in the future just look at what Facebook has been doing.

Human interactions will be a train wreck it is now in many ways more electronics and less interactions every day.

You are not wrong about this. I see it with young people we hire. They want to live behind a screen.

They do not want to pick up the phone and actually talk to people. They do not want to have a face to face meeting. Most of them are awful in Court.

Is that what happened to you?

I had to laugh the oldest was here the other day with the grandkids heading out to the Black Hills, when they pulled up he got out to get them out of their kids seats. I seen he had a bag of mini Oreos opened the first thing that came to mind was that Lucky Dog show where you do good you get a treat for every command you follow. LOL