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Cussed and threatened by coworker

Posted By: Davisfur

Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 08:57 PM

I got cussed by a coworker today that has a history of cussing people out at work. It was the 4th time in my 8 years at the company by this same individual. We are a small company of just 12 employees and the 3 times this happened before I did not retaliate but instead held me tongue and had a talk with the boss (who also happens to be the business owner) about it and he "had a talk with him". The last time it happened I told the boss that I would not take a cussing from him in silence again and today was the last straw. The coworker in question yelled across a small thoroughfare between our respective shops that I was a Fat SOB and a string of other profanity and I replied that he needed to shut his #&@$ mouth and it then devolved into a heated back and forth that ended in him standing in my door threatening to beat me to a pulp and me holding a 3 foot pry bar at the ready in the event I had to defend myself. Now we have both left work and I told my boss that if that employee was there tomorrow I would not be. My question is what actions can I take if they do not do the right thing and fire him? And did I kill all my chances of any legal action by sticking up for myself? I never once threatened him just verbal cursing in which I told him he needed to shut up and go home. I hate to put the company which is severely behind and short handed in any more of a bind than it's already in because I like the place and people and I consider the boss a friend but I don't think he is going to fire this coworker and I'm not working with that individual any longer. All the boss had to say was "you're sure putting me in a bind because I need both of you, I'll have a talk with him." In my opinion a stern talking to is not what is needed as he's had them with this individual before and it never lasts very long and the incidents get more loud and violent every time.
Posted By: Kevin Colpetzer

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:08 PM

The secret to winning any violent conflict is to be first, with the most. You left it go to far. Actions speak louder than words. When he opened his mouth you should have shut it for him
Posted By: bhugo

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:09 PM

Terrible situation. One bad apple can spoil the bunch. Maybe your boss will see that.
Posted By: BigBob

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:10 PM

Call the cops to get an official record about it, and I'm sure that will capture the Boss' attention.
Not sure who to call, but harassment like that is against Federal and state laws. There should be a sign posted in a conspicuous place near the time clock, or some kind of employee notice board, also Federal law, that details your rights. Read it.
I expect Ok has some kind of State Employment office that will have a human rights dept. you can contact.
Sounds like your Boss doesn't want to be bothered by all this, make enough noise and force him into action. You can sue him, and I'm sure he's aware if it, for not taking care of this. Good luck, You don't have to put up with this crap!
Posted By: BigBob

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:12 PM

Originally Posted by Kevin Colpetzer
The secret to winning any violent conflict is to be first, with the most. You left it go to far. Actions speak louder than words. When he opened his mouth you should have shut it for him

Very bad idea! You need to take the high road and stay legal as long as you can.
Posted By: Pawnee

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:14 PM

I feel bad for you. Not a good spot to be in. Iíd be watching my 6 and packing heat. This day and age guys like you described scare me. I would definitely have another sit down with the boss.
Posted By: btomlin

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:14 PM

I'm not sure I would want to work for an employer that found any value in someone that acted that way in the workplace. A personal attack on a fellow employee would not have had an opportunity to happen a 2nd time. Not much of an example for other employees to follow, imo.
Posted By: west river rogue

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:19 PM

Boss is definitely liable as he knows its happening. Its his responsibility to get him gone.
Posted By: Nessmuck

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:25 PM

Just leave....plenty of jobs around...the Boss will call you back and then you can name your price. If not ..your not in a toxic environment anymore.
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:29 PM

I made it a point to keep enough of my wits about me as to not make any threats against him but I did stand my ground and fire back verbally. He was close enough to me and was threatening to the point that had I been armed (which is not permitted at work or I would have been) I would have used force against him. I'm a big strong guy but out of shape. This guy is lean and muscled and up until a couple of years ago fought MMA at some of the local Indian casinos. I'm not toeing the line with a guy like that. I hate this because it may very well be the death of our small company. We are both shop foremen over our respective shops and it will be a big loss either way it goes. The boss has wanted to fire this guy for a couple of years due to poor attendance, leaving whenever he feels like it and of course treating coworkers like garbage and being a general cancer to the company (the bosses own words) but won't do it because "we are shorthanded and behind and can't afford to lose anybody." Today was the first words spoken between this coworker and myself since the last time I had to go to the boss about him 4 or 5 months ago.
Posted By: ~ADC~

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:29 PM

Sounds like a serious Situation. I'm not sure how I would handle it but you have already shown more restraint than I would have.

I am interested to see how Savell would solve the issue.
Posted By: Yes sir

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:30 PM

Originally Posted by Nessmuck
Just leave....plenty of jobs around...the Boss will call you back and then you can name your price. If not ..your not in a toxic environment anymore.

Best option for u here. A year down the road you will be glad it happened. The boss will make his choice then u can make yours. Legal action will just be a headache and waste of time.
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:33 PM

Oh we all know that Savell would have slap tamed him in a heartbeat but I don't have that much Texas in me. I went straight from the shop to the bosses farm where he was planting wheat and got him off the tractor and explained the situation.
Posted By: KeithC

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:36 PM

What started the argument?

If you were clearly in the right. I would walk if they don't fire your adversary. There's way more decent jobs than there is decent employees right now.

Keith
Posted By: HobbieTrapper

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:40 PM

Knowing what you know and feeling the fear you felt, it could have already been over with by now. Eminent danger does not have to be communicated physically to justify a response.

Sounds like you are about to change jobs.
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:44 PM

It started because I was in our only employee bathroom answering the call of nature and he got something in his eye from not wearing safety glasses and needed the eye wash which is in the first aid kit in the bathroom. But instead of knocking on the door amd explaining the situation he decided to go off the handle and throw a fit. So when he saw me walk from the break room (where our bathroom is) back into my shop he started hurling obscenities, and threats at me for being in the bathroom. It started with "stay out of the GD bathroom you fat SOB!" and that was the point at which I told him to shut his bleeping mouth. This is the most legitimate reason he has ever had for cussing me. The first time was because I came into his shop and fixed an iron worker that the boss didn't want anybody but me fixing because I'm experienced in that area. Second time was because I told the boss about something he did that got him a talking to and the third time was when he came to my pickup and yelled at me for being 10 minutes over on my afternoon break even though I had worked 20 minutes into my break to finish what I was doing. All three of these incidents were reported to the boss but there was never anything formal put on record. Just got him a "talking to." The third time was when I told the boss I would not stand down from him again.
Posted By: Trap Setter

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:46 PM

Yup, its new job day. The boss will call you back but you have some sort of skills to be foreman so take them else where TODAY. Why spend money to hire a lawyer just prove a point? You said you like the owner so why sue him. Just leave. If he values you like you seem to think he does he will be calling as soon as you are late tomorrow. If he doesn't you will have a new job quick and not be threatened by a mma journeyman who clearly has a loose nut or two upstairs. Do you have a family? If so what will they do if you get hurt real bad? Sure you will be entitled to a nice settlement but then the business you don't want to ruin will be ruined anyhow and you won't see a penny till your bills are past due and house is in foreclosure. What then?
Posted By: yotetrapper30

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:46 PM

I want to hear coonman's take, lol.

Seriously though, I would leave. No job is worth all that nonsense. Especially now when everyone is begging for help. Go find a new job tomorrow that pays even better and be done with it.
Posted By: Boco

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:48 PM

You have basically two choices-leave or knock the guys teeth out with the crowbar.
Posted By: HobbieTrapper

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:49 PM

Yikes! ďSomething bad about to happenď.
Posted By: grumley701

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:51 PM

Afraid to say how'd I deal with that..
Posted By: Trap Setter

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:52 PM

IF the other guy gets fired be very aware of your surroundings for a few weeks at least. Some guys don't like being let go.
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:54 PM

Yeah Hobbie I'm afraid so. I've hit a side gig relief pumping for a buddy but it's not too consistent. May be time to try for my own pumping route.
Posted By: HobbieTrapper

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:58 PM

Originally Posted by Davisfur
Yeah Hobbie I'm afraid so. I've hit a side gig relief pumping for a buddy but it's not too consistent. May be time to try for my own pumping route.


Sometimes it takes being pushed into other adventures to realize our potential.

I donít know you but guidance prayers never hurt anybody...........except Moses. lol Just kidding.
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 09:59 PM

You make valid points and I appreciate everybody's input. I do have a wife but no children just a spoiled rotten cur dog and yard full of hounds. My vehicles and house are all paid for no large debt just normal utilities and such. I have a feeling that if he and I meet again it will not go so well for him. I told the boss (who is a huge 2A supporter) exactly what I said above about using lethal force to defend myself and he didn't seem to like it much. I guess that's why he doesn't want us armed at work.
Posted By: Canvasback2

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 10:00 PM

I would say file a complaint with the State EEOC for employee on employee harassment. But, it looks like that only works if there is 15 or more employees at the Company. I would say quit that job , AFTER you have found a new job. If your old Boss wants you back; tell him that the other employee has to be fired first , and as a condition of coming back to your old job, you DEMAND!!! a pay raise of $10.00 per hour . Worst thing he can say , is no.
Posted By: HobbieTrapper

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 10:01 PM

Originally Posted by Davisfur
You make valid points and I appreciate everybody's input. I do have a wife but no children just a spoiled rotten cur dog. My vehicles and house are all paid for no large debt just normal utilities and such.


If sheís a goodun, sheíll ride shotgun on the adventure with you. The wife Iím talking about, not the cur.
Posted By: Yes sir

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 10:01 PM

Trapping gig in South Dakota
Posted By: BigBob

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 10:04 PM

Originally Posted by Davisfur
I made it a point to keep enough of my wits about me as to not make any threats against him but I did stand my ground and fire back verbally. He was close enough to me and was threatening to the point that had I been armed (which is not permitted at work or I would have been) I would have used force against him. I'm a big strong guy but out of shape. This guy is lean and muscled and up until a couple of years ago fought MMA at some of the local Indian casinos. I'm not toeing the line with a guy like that. I hate this because it may very well be the death of our small company. We are both shop foremen over our respective shops and it will be a big loss either way it goes. The boss has wanted to fire this guy for a couple of years due to poor attendance, leaving whenever he feels like it and of course treating coworkers like garbage and being a general cancer to the company (the bosses own words) but won't do it because "we are shorthanded and behind and can't afford to lose anybody." Today was the first words spoken between this coworker and myself since the last time I had to go to the boss about him 4 or 5 months ago.


That MMA thing explains a lot! File a complaint with your states Employment Agency. He sounds like the kind of bunghole to maybe hunt you down even if you do quit. Get everything on the record.
Posted By: concrete man

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 10:07 PM

You made a mistake letting him cuss you the first time. No one has to take that. Now the 2nd and 3rd time that is on you.
Posted By: Nessmuck

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 10:07 PM

As Johnny Paycheck would say.....Ē Take this Job and Shove it...I ainít working here No More ď...Sounds like the guy has had the oxygen to his brain ...interrupted one too many times.
Posted By: Owen156

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 10:09 PM

I would document everything and get written statements from other employees, who have probably been abused by the guy also. The boss is creating a hostile workplace environment by keeping that guy on the payroll. Take your documentation to the boss and make him sign for it as this puts him on notice that you have forced his hand to do something, Maybe he will fire the guy and maybe he will fire both of you but you are already talking about leaving so what do you have to lose? The end goal is to make things better for the remaining employees, whether you are one or not.
Posted By: Oh Snap

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 10:09 PM

Your boss is a wimp. Trouble makers cause production to slow down!

As an employer I have learned that bad eggs have to go even if it damages business. He doesnít know it but the hot head controls his business!

There is something else that can be a problem and just happened to me. Hard drugs are another problem in these times. A lot worse than I have ever witnessed. Just had to fire a guy for taking a sledge hammer to some equipment and for no apparent reason. When I hired him he looked healthy and over the months he became super thin. I found out that he had just got out of rehab. He challenged a crew of electricians. They refused to work in the same building as he was.



Posted By: KeithC

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 10:14 PM

Originally Posted by Davisfur
It started because I was in our only employee bathroom answering the call of nature and he got something in his eye from not wearing safety glasses and needed the eye wash which is in the first aid kit in the bathroom. But instead of knocking on the door amd explaining the situation he decided to go off the handle and throw a fit. So when he saw me walk from the break room (where our bathroom is) back into my shop he started hurling obscenities, and threats at me for being in the bathroom. It started with "stay out of the GD bathroom you fat SOB!" and that was the point at which I told him to shut his bleeping mouth. This is the most legitimate reason he has ever had for cussing me. The first time was because I came into his shop and fixed an iron worker that the boss didn't want anybody but me fixing because I'm experienced in that area. Second time was because I told the boss about something he did that got him a talking to and the third time was when he came to my pickup and yelled at me for being 10 minutes over on my afternoon break even though I had worked 20 minutes into my break to finish what I was doing. All three of these incidents were reported to the boss but there was never anything formal put on record. Just got him a "talking to." The third time was when I told the boss I would not stand down from him again.


You were in the right all 4 times from what you shared. I would not work a single day more there unless they fired your adversary immediately. If you feel the same way, make sure your boss clearly understands that and immediately walk if he doesn't fire your adversary immediately. You should not have to put up with childish crap like that at work.

By the way, you are only legally justified in using deadly force to prevent death or serious bodily injury to yourself or another. Serious bodily injury involves substantial risk of death, protracted and obvious disfigurement, or protracted loss or impairment of the function of a bodily member or organ or mental faculty

You can't legally use deadly force to prevent just getting beaten up.

Keith
Posted By: HobbieTrapper

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 10:42 PM

.
Posted By: bblwi

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 10:47 PM

You solved half of your boss's problem by saying you would be gone if the other guy was there. What and who are right or wrong here is now quite far down the road. If the other guy stays and you said you would be gone what will they all feel if you stay, even if you do so because you want to help the firm and the boss who you work well with. I don't know the other behavior or characteristics of the other employee but he has survived several other incidents from what you wrote. Should be a lot of comparable opportunities near by in this job market.

Bryce
Posted By: CTRAPS

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 10:48 PM

This may be the deciding factor for the owner of your company to put a boot in this guys arse once and for all.

Since you are both in some type of a supervisory position, I'd think your boss wouldn't want the rest of his employees to witness this kind of behavior. What kind of message does this send to the rest of the employees in the company? The next thing that seems to happen in situations like this is, now the other guy wants to start pitting his people against your people, in an attempt to get even or over on you. This is only bad for business and helps no one, especially your boss. In a factory, there are most likely witnesses to back up your story. Ask your boss/ owner to speak with them to verify what you told him.

I've always believed there should be no lesson learned from the second kick of a mule. Putting up with this abuse once was bad enough. Putting up with it four times is ridiculous.
Posted By: KeithC

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 10:51 PM

Originally Posted by HobbieTrapper
Originally Posted by KeithC
You were in the right all 4 times from what you shared. I would not work a single day more there unless they fired your adversary immediately. If you feel the same way, make sure your boss clearly understands that and immediately walk if he doesn't fire your adversary immediately. You should not have to put up with childish crap like that at work.

By the way, you are only legally justified in using deadly force to prevent death or serious bodily injury to yourself or another. Serious bodily injury involves substantial risk of death, protracted and obvious disfigurement, or protracted loss or impairment of the function of a bodily member or organ or mental faculty

You can't legally use deadly force to prevent just getting beaten up.

Keith


Hmmm, had a couple guys in the warehouse get into it. Things got heated and the trouble maker made a move on the abused. The abused punched him in the throat, he run off and died. No charges filed after the interviews were conducted. Not sure how much crap you have to eat in Oklahoma but here you apparently don't have to take a beating to defend your position.


If the abused had a reasonable, legitimate fear of serious bodily injury or death he was justified in using deadly force.

Anyone who is involved in a situation where they kill someone should always talk to a lawyer representing them before talking to law enforcement, even if they believe they were fully acting within in the law. The words you use are very, very important when describing what happened to law enforcement or the prosecutor.

Keith
Posted By: Feedinggrounds

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 11:02 PM

Originally Posted by KeithC
Originally Posted by Davisfur
It started because I was in our only employee bathroom answering the call of nature and he got something in his eye from not wearing safety glasses and needed the eye wash which is in the first aid kit in the bathroom. But instead of knocking on the door amd explaining the situation he decided to go off the handle and throw a fit. So when he saw me walk from the break room (where our bathroom is) back into my shop he started hurling obscenities, and threats at me for being in the bathroom. It started with "stay out of the GD bathroom you fat SOB!" and that was the point at which I told him to shut his bleeping mouth. This is the most legitimate reason he has ever had for cussing me. The first time was because I came into his shop and fixed an iron worker that the boss didn't want anybody but me fixing because I'm experienced in that area. Second time was because I told the boss about something he did that got him a talking to and the third time was when he came to my pickup and yelled at me for being 10 minutes over on my afternoon break even though I had worked 20 minutes into my break to finish what I was doing. All three of these incidents were reported to the boss but there was never anything formal put on record. Just got him a "talking to." The third time was when I told the boss I would not stand down from him again.


You were in the right all 4 times from what you shared. I would not work a single day more there unless they fired your adversary immediately. If you feel the same way, make sure your boss clearly understands that and immediately walk if he doesn't fire your adversary immediately. You should not have to put up with childish crap like that at work.

By the way, you are only legally justified in using deadly force to prevent death or serious bodily injury to yourself or another. Serious bodily injury involves substantial risk of death, protracted and obvious disfigurement, or protracted loss or impairment of the function of a bodily member or organ or mental faculty

You can't legally use deadly force to prevent just getting beaten up.

Keith

Just what is your definition of "getting beaten up"? At almost 60 years old I ain't taking even a light beating, by my definition. When the cops come, the only words they hear from me are " I was in fear for my life, officer I want to speak to a lawyer"
Posted By: yotetrapper30

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 11:04 PM

Originally Posted by KeithC


If the abused had a reasonable, legitimate fear of serious bodily injury or death he was justified in using deadly force.

Anyone who is involved in a situation where they kill someone should always talk to a lawyer representing them before talking to law enforcement, even if they believe they were fully acting within in the law. The words you use are very, very important when describing what happened to law enforcement or the prosecutor.

Keith


Of course, all this varies greatly by state. In some states you can shoot someone breaking into your empty car. In other states you can't even shoot them after they break into your home with you in it.

But I agree with saying nothing to the police before your lawyer gets there either way.
Posted By: Blaine County

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 11:36 PM

I would want to hear his side of it too, but based on your posts one of you is getting fired. Maybe both of you.

The boss could also be afraid of him. I suggest you start looking for another job. Oilfield is picking up.
Posted By: Gene Dziza

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 11:44 PM

Wow, I'm sorry you're going through this. I'm with the guys that say to leave. I have little doubt you could force the issue into his termination. But the guy sounds unstable and capable. Do you really want to be the reason he's fired? I understand he's getting himself fired but he won't see it that way.

When one door closes, another always opens, and most times in my life when something like this happened, good ultimately came of it. This may prompt you into something much better. I hope it does.
Posted By: Hodagtrapper

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 11:44 PM

Sounds like your boss is afraid of the guy. Takes a backbone to do the right thing (fire his butt) and considering the MMA background of the guy your boss through placating him is a wuss.

Chris
Posted By: Buck (Zandra)

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 11:45 PM

I've been there,your boss is a wienie.He doesn't want to deal with it so he wont.Beware,if you stay,it won't get any better.
Posted By: Drifter

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 11:46 PM

Sounds to me like the boss is scared of him too. Way past time to find a new job.
Posted By: SNIPERB🦝

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 11:52 PM

I think your employer might have an OHSA issue with that eye wash station/first aid kit. I've never seen a facility where there was the possibility of having the eye wash station/first aid being locked up.
Posted By: Oh Snap

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/06/21 11:57 PM

I don't know how old you are Davisfur. I am almost 80 and still working by choice. If I look back I would never have guessed how many different jobs I have had.

So with that move on and don't look back! If there was to be change it would have already happened. Its the best time ever to be looking for a job too many are on the government dole and for a while it won't change.
Posted By: trapdog1

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 12:07 AM

I'm not sure I'd trust your boss much. He needs to handle this situation, but instead he seems to be shirking that responsibilty. I'd be worried he is going to tell you what you want to hear, and then do exactly the same to the other guy. You may think he is a friend, but I'd just beware.
Posted By: Leftlane

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 12:38 AM

.
Posted By: rex123

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 12:44 AM

He was holding the crow bar not the other guy.
Posted By: Okie Farmer

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 12:48 AM

I can do some checking and see if there's any openings in the steel shop at GN2 if you want me to. I'm not sure where your from but have a fair guess.
Posted By: Leftlane

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 12:53 AM

Originally Posted by rex123
He was holding the crow bar not the other guy.



Yeah now we see what can go wrong when I read a long post on a small phone
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:08 AM

Originally Posted by Okie Farmer
I can do some checking and see if there's any openings in the steel shop at GN2 if you want me to. I'm not sure where your from but have a fair guess.

Where is that located Okie? And yes Leftlane I was holding the bar, I picked it up because he was advancing on my position at a rapid pace all the while yelling and cussing at the top of his lungs. I'm pretty sure our stand your ground law covers verbal threats when the oppressed is in fear for his life.
Posted By: James

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:10 AM

From what you said, you were the victim of an assault. You should have called the cops. Be sure to do so, if it happens again.

George Zimmerman used deadly force to avoid being beaten up. Fists can be deadly weapons. But Zimmerman got dragged through the legal process to prove his innocence.

Jim
Posted By: James

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:12 AM

Originally Posted by Davisfur
Originally Posted by Okie Farmer
I can do some checking and see if there's any openings in the steel shop at GN2 if you want me to. I'm not sure where your from but have a fair guess.

Where is that located Okie? And yes Leftlane I was holding the bar, I picked it up because he was advancing on my position at a rapid pace all the while yelling and cussing at the top of his lungs. I'm pretty sure our stand your ground law covers verbal threats when the oppressed is in fear for his life.


That's an assault you're describing.

Your boss doesn't seem to appreciate how far out his neck is sticking.

Jim
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:19 AM

Originally Posted by Oh Snap
I don't know how old you are Davisfur. I am almost 80 and still working by choice. If I look back I would never have guessed how many different jobs I have had.

So with that move on and don't look back! If there was to be change it would have already happened. Its the best time ever to be looking for a job too many are on the government dole and for a while it won't change.

I'm 39 years old last month. I went to work for a Ford dealership straight out of high school and spent 1w years there and have been at this job for over 8 now. I think everyone is right about it being new job time but I hate to do it. My uncle has put in 25 years at this company and is semi retired but works with me 2 days a week and he taught me everything I know about it. He was foreman over both shops when he was full time and he trained me to be his replacement but when he retired the boss split the position because the guy I'm having problems with had seniority on me and threw a fit.
Posted By: 52Carl

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:23 AM

Originally Posted by Boco
You have basically two choices-leave or knock the guys teeth out with the crowbar.

I'd've done both already.
(I couldn't resist the way underused triple contraction.)
"I hate rude behavior in a man. I won't tolerate it."
Posted By: James

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:26 AM

Originally Posted by 52Carl
Originally Posted by Boco
You have basically two choices-leave or knock the guys teeth out with the crowbar.

I'd've done both already.
(I couldn't resist the way underused triple contraction.)
"I hate rude behavior in a man. I won't tolerate it."


That would be foolish, unless the other guy assaults him.

Jim
Posted By: Yes sir

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:32 AM

James
I thought you said the guy already assaulted him. You lawyers confuse me
Posted By: James

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:39 AM

After the assault is over--after he's left the building or otherwise broken off the assault--you can't go beat his brains out with a prybar.

You may be entitled to crack him on the head in the act of his assault.

Zimmerman shot Martin during the attack, not afterwards.

Jim
Posted By: midlander

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:45 AM

A real simple conversation without emotion that goes something like this: "boss, at the end of today, you are only going to have one foreman working for you. You'll be making that decision by your action or by your inaction, but you will be making the decision. I guess at this point you need to decide who is better for this company in the long haul and decide because tomorrow only one of us is going to show up. Please let me know by the end of the day."

Or just pull the Johnny Paycheck card.. smile
Posted By: Pirogue

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:47 AM

Should have never mentioned armed defense to your boss. Now that u have and if things go south and you do use lethal force.....aint gonna go good for u.
Posted By: Scott__aR

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:48 AM

So many things going on here just from one side of the account. Plenty of blame to go all around ... facility design, owner, no conflict resolution and de-escalation skills anywhere in management, and the individuals involved.

Generally threatening the 'him or me' never works out for anyone. You can't successfully dictate what action must be taken unless you own the business. Additionally, having private conversations with your employer suggesting use of force against another individual puts you in an undesirable employment position. I understand you were upset; but calm will always win in the end. But both those cards are now in play.

Better to start looking for another job. Regardless how this turns out, any savy business owner will keep this event and how you have managed it as a supervisor in the back of their mind for the rest of your employment.
Posted By: James

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:49 AM

Originally Posted by Pirogue
Should have never mentioned armed defense to your boss. Now that u have and if things go south and you do use lethal force.....aint gonna go good for u.


Yes.

And it's bad tactics to forewarn the enemy.

Jim
Posted By: beavert

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:54 AM

.


Posted By: Savell

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:56 AM

Pop him over the head with that crowbar.... jerk his britches down and stick a lit black cat firecracker in his butt... walk off and go work for the county driving the maintainer
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 02:01 AM

As good as it probably would have felt to smack him with the bar, a physical confrontation was not at all what I wanted. But I also had decided I wasn't backing up anymore either. I'm normally very slow to anger in such situations because my entire life my dad had always told me that I should not fight due to my size and the fact that the one physical altercation I had when I was younger was at school and it took 4 male teachers to pull me off the kid, I had stomped his ribs in and kicked him in the face 3 or 4 times. As far as everybody that says I should have left earlier when he cussed me before I will agree but it's been very hard to think about because I like the boss and the work and getting to work with my uncle.
Posted By: Horn

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 02:02 AM

Just take a day or three off and wait for the boss to call or not.
If he doesn't call file for UnEmployment stating Hostile Work environment and find a new job.
Posted By: Marty

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 02:06 AM

slap the taste outta his mouth..... smile

zero tolerance for disrespect.
Posted By: ZionHeritageFarm

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 02:08 AM

There is also the legal route. What you are describing fits the legal definition of what is called assault in Kansas. Not sure what it would be called where you live. There doesnít have to be physical contact. In Kansas it is defined as ď placing you in fear or apprehension of bodily harm ď.
Then there could be the restraining order, no contact order, etc
Posted By: Moosetrot

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 02:24 AM

I hope you are keeping documentation including dates, times, what was said, etc. for every interaction you are having with the bad guy as well as your boss. You should also get the names of any witnesses.

All of the above will become very important if you go for Unemployment after quitting or if you decide to file a Hostile Workplace claim.

Keep your cool and don't get baited or encouraged into a situation the most likely will wind up with you doing jail time.

If you have a cell phone that is capable of recording or taking video I would keep it on you.

Moosetrot
Posted By: AntiGov

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 02:41 AM

I didn't read all the posts but sounds like your boss needs to do his job so you can do yours .

The DB needs terminated

The " short handed " excuse doesn't cut it

I suspect the boss has helped create the problem ....no past proper disciplinary action , no documentation , etc

Prolly afraid of retaliation

Sounds like he may end up loosing a good employee when he could have grown a pair and rid the company of a toxic DB.
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 02:49 AM

There is no documentation on any of this to my knowledge but I did go to the boss every time. As far as witnesses go there were 2 guys that heard everything and 1 guy that saw everything. Problem is that guy is the guy I'm having trouble withs best friend. He was tagging along behind his buddy all the way to my shop and witnessed the whole thing. Whether he will admit to anything is another thing. It is a very small business like I said there are only 12 of us including the two ladies in the office (one of which is the bosses wife and was my school teacher for 2 years in junior high school) and the boss. We haven't had a job application put in in well over a year and a half it is going to be a severe blow to the company to lose anyone. It seems nobody wants to get burned on a daily basis for $20 an hour and no benefits anymore.
Posted By: Moosetrot

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 02:57 AM

I would bet you can do better in a different job. It's always uncomfortable to leave something you have done and know, but the situation there is very toxic and I am afraid you are going to come out on the losing end of something.

Be confident in your skills and work ethic, but most importantly yourself.

Moosetrot
Posted By: the Blak Spot

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 02:58 AM

Sounds like he is "gaslighting" you. I would document(video or paper) then ignore him. Had this happen to me for 7 yrs. gets old, but just words. The day the guy quit bothering me was when he started to say something about my wife as i was walking away. He shut his trap fast when i turned around, took of my hat, and clenched my fists as i walked toward him. He ran off, and didnt bother me again after that.
Posted By: Providence Farm

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 03:01 AM

The use of lethal force comment is all blowing smoke bull. You had a steel bar in your hand and did nothing you would have done nothing if you would have had a gun or knife either. I bet you probably did have a knife in your pocket but didn't even think about it. If your like me the knife is though of as a tool not a weapon. Not knocking you but don't lie to yourself.

I worked construction with lots of guys like you describe. I thumped some heads, got my head thumped, and walked off jobs refusing to work with someone unstable that close to me. What's best? Staying calm and walking off to another job . When it get physical you will be getting another job not by choice at that point and win or lose you still loose.

I would call in until I found another job or tell he fired me. Just my .02
Posted By: K52

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 03:03 AM

Are you related to coon man? Life is too short to put up with that kind of crap. The job market has never been better, what you waiting on? You are scared to quit and the boss is scared to fire the guy, staying there is a no win situation for you. Do yourself a favor and reduce the stress in your life, move on.
Posted By: ~ADC~

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 03:03 AM

Originally Posted by Davisfur
It seems nobody wants to get burned on a daily basis for $20 an hour and no benefits anymore.


If that's what you're making you should be looking for another job regardless of this jerk you're working with.
Posted By: KeithC

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 03:21 AM

Originally Posted by ~ADC~
Originally Posted by Davisfur
It seems nobody wants to get burned on a daily basis for $20 an hour and no benefits anymore.


If that's what you're making you should be looking for another job regardless of this jerk you're working with.


You can likely find a similar job, at your experience level, that pays well over $30.00 an hour.

Keith
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 03:46 AM

Originally Posted by Providence Farm
The use of lethal force comment is all blowing smoke bull. You had a steel bar in your hand and did nothing you would have done nothing if you would have had a gun or knife either. I bet you probably did have a knife in your pocket but didn't even think about it. If your like me the knife is though of as a tool not a weapon. Not knocking you but don't lie to yourself.

I worked construction with lots of guys like you describe. I thumped some heads, got my head thumped, and walked off jobs refusing to work with someone unstable that close to me. What's best? Staying calm and walking off to another job . When it get physical you will be getting another job not by choice at that point and win or lose you still loose.

I would call in until I found another job or tell he fired me. Just my .02


You can speculate on what would have happened had I been armed if you like that's your opinion and I don't hold it against you. But just so we are clear I was holding a 3 foot long bar which was what I could reach at the moment that had more reach than my pocket knife which was the first thought in my head but quickly ruled out due to the leather gloves I was wearing making it pretty much useless to try and retrieve from my pocket. But the bar was what stopped him short of coming in contact with me. He never closed the distance close enough to reach with the bar let alone a knife and I did not advance towards him nor did I back away from him, when the ordeal was over it was him slinking back to his hole not me. I have no desire to go hand to hand with a guy half my weight has half again more reach than me and is more experienced in fighting not to mention likely hoped up on who knows what because we do not and have never drug tested anyone for fear of losing the entire workforce. And no I am not related in any way to coonman although I can see how this thread would make it seem so.
Posted By: Jurassic Park

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 03:48 AM

If I was you, I would quit.

If I was your boss, I would fire you.


The next thing I would do if I was you is start my own business doing exactly what your employer is doing. Hire Uncle.
Posted By: white dog

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 03:51 AM

The appearance of nepotism causes a lot of hard feelings in the workplace. I'm curious why a man that it took 4 adults to pull him off another kid when he was in school felt like he needed a 3 foot pry bar to defend himself from any man. The way it works is either you kick his or he kicks yours.
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 03:53 AM

Originally Posted by ~ADC~
Originally Posted by Davisfur
It seems nobody wants to get burned on a daily basis for $20 an hour and no benefits anymore.


If that's what you're making you should be looking for another job regardless of this jerk you're working with.

I had been happy at this job because it was only 7 miles from home leaving me close to home to buy fur and do side gigs on occasion. It also came with permission to hunt a half section of nice hunting ground amd fish a 6 acre pond full of big bass and black crappie. I know none of this is a substitute for benefits and decent wages but it's what I had and it worked.
Posted By: Providence Farm

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 04:14 AM

My meaning may have been mis took. A normal person will hesitate not being a volent aggressor by nature. That's normal. Also being conserned about the thought of going to jail after defending yourself. Heck I'm speculating and assuming we all know first hand how effective an ax Handel is for dispatch. Human heads are softer and steel bar is heavier and harder. One swing and it could easily been lights out for the guy. Subconsciously you know this and not violent by nature= slight hesitation.

When I have to walk through a metal detectors or get asked if I have weapons I often forget they consider my knife a weapon. To me it's just a tool and I never think of it as a weapon. That could just be me?

I think it better you didn't split his head though you could have easily done so and he knows it. It's a bad position to be put into. You apparently have skills and management experience . I would have a resume updated tonight and be job hunting now. That management experience cat even move you into other industries you probably have not even though about. Changing jobs is scary if you have been there a long time . At least it is scaring me when I'm looking after being in the same place for over 15 years.

I bet you can find something with more pay if you decide That's the best option for you.
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 04:45 AM

Appreciate the clarification Providence like I said no hard feelings here. And White Dog I didn't mention it before but the altercation I had in school was a similar situation as this. A guy in school had been using me for the butt of all his jokes and as a personal punching bag because I was chubby and poor, funny thing was I outweighed him by probably 30 pounds and ran a fleshing knife like it was my only purpose in life, chubby but stout. One day my dad saw me with my shirt off and asked where I got all the bruises and I told him. He asked me why I let someone do that to me and I replied that I was always told if I got in trouble at school I got in trouble at home and fighting got you a week of in school suspension so I knew it would land me a whipping at home. He told me that as long as I didn't start it I would not get in trouble at home and the next time this kid laid hands on me I better hurt him because if I came home with more bruises and hadn't done anything about it I was getting striped at home. When the teachers pulled me off the kid I didn't know where I was or what was going on and all I could see was white light. The kid had to be taken to the hospital for broken ribs and nose and missing teeth. One of the old coaches /teachers that helped pull me off said he had not seen anyone so intent on killing another human since he left Vietnam and he was fully convinced I would have stomped him to death had they not stopped it. That is the reason I try to avoid physical confrontation on top of having better sense than to go head to head with a guy who fights for fun.
Posted By: Steven 49er

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 11:14 AM

20 bucks an hour and no benefits? That is reason enough to quit.

Life is too short to be miserable at work, either tell the boss you are going to call a lawyer or quit.

If you are going to stay start documenting any new problems and sit down and write down past problems.
Posted By: HobbieTrapper

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 11:31 AM

Try this.

Tell him you know it was unfortunate that you were occupying the restroom when he had an emergency, then ask him if his eye is okay. Mention how you notice he is amped up quite often and does he know the freedom and peace in the Gospel of Jesus Christ?
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 11:59 AM

That's a good idea Hobbie but I'm not sure the religious approach would work on this guy. He got arrested 9 or 10 years ago for domestic abuse against his wife and possession of Marijuana and meth that they had hidden in thier infant sons diaper bag. When he got out on probation he became super religious right up until his probation ran out and that's when he went into MMA. Now he drinks like a fish and smokes Marijuana but I'm not entirely sure with the mood swings he seems to have he's not on something a lot stronger and less helpful than Marijuana. I appreciate everybody's input on this issue. I'm headed in this morning to see what the bosses decision is. Wish me luck.
Posted By: HobbieTrapper

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 12:11 PM

Prayers Davis.
Posted By: HobbieTrapper

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 12:13 PM

Originally Posted by Davisfur
That's a good idea Hobbie but I'm not sure the religious approach would work on this guy. He got arrested 9 or 10 years ago for domestic abuse against his wife and possession of Marijuana and meth that they had hidden in thier infant sons diaper bag. When he got out on probation he became super religious right up until his probation ran out and that's when he went into MMA. Now he drinks like a fish and smokes Marijuana but I'm not entirely sure with the mood swings he seems to have he's not on something a lot stronger and less helpful than Marijuana. I appreciate everybody's input on this issue. I'm headed in this morning to see what the bosses decision is. Wish me luck.


Jesus has calmed a lot worse.
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 12:21 PM

Thanks Hobbie
Posted By: Hodagtrapper

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 12:27 PM

All the best for you and your work situation!

Chris
Posted By: 330-Trapper

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 12:39 PM

Originally Posted by Gene Dziza
Wow, I'm sorry you're going through this. I'm with the guys that say to leave. I have little doubt you could force the issue into his termination. But the guy sounds unstable and capable. Do you really want to be the reason he's fired? I understand he's getting himself fired but he won't see it that way.

When one door closes, another always opens, and most times in my life when something like this happened, good ultimately came of it. This may prompt you into something much better. I hope it does.

All of this^
Posted By: Trapset

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 12:55 PM

Donít bring anything to a fight you wouldnít want used on you.

Good luck today.
Posted By: Flipper 56

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:25 PM

Good luck today.
Posted By: JSfab

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:31 PM

Sounds like a tough situation.

There was a third option available to you, but that ship has very likely sailed already. So if everything you said is accurate, and there are not not some details left out that would give a different perspective on the situation, my estimation would be for you to leave quietly and go your own way.

From what you told us, in my view the other guy already won this one. Legal course may seem to be an option, but there are better ways, with better results. There is a way that seems right to man, but it's end is the way of death.

Most people would rather seek revenge than to see their enemy changed for better.

I wish you the best. Be careful, and be wise.
Posted By: Drifter

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 01:35 PM

Your so called boss has gave the bully the reigns to run the company by allowing this to go on. I would be looking for a new job and not look back.$20 an hour and no benefits isn't much better then the $15 an hour minimum wage they keep throwing around.

One day if this guy flies off the handle and hurts someone the doors to that place will most likely be locked. Sounds like it is running on borrowed time.
Posted By: Providence Farm

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 02:21 PM

Your dad sounds like me. My daughter was getting picked on before we started homeschooling. We went though all the channels. Finally I told her to kick the boys hind end(3rd grade). She didn't want to because she would get in trouble at school. I said yes you will but only until I get there then I will straighten it out. But if I hear you had any more issues and didn't Handel them you will be in trouble at home.

About a week later the playground attendent pulls my wife to the side and tell her how Isabelle put that boy on the ground in some kind of leg lock where he could not move and he was just flailing and crying.

I just smiled yes she was paying attention to what I was teaching and remembered and effectively used a leg bar. Neither that boy or anyone else besides the principal ever gave her another problem. That principal no longer works in the school system.

I hope things go well for you today keep us posted. Just remember though there are managers at my local Rual king of hat make $20 an hour and get benefits so plenty of other options are out there.
Posted By: Leftlane

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 02:37 PM

I hope things go well today and this gets resolved.
Posted By: GritGuy

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 02:42 PM

Way past the time that this can be settled amicably between you two.

Boss has decided to let the loudest be the winner and you seem to be the pacifist in this as best you can to keep being there.

About the only way to end the matter is if both of you clash in front of witness's who may or may not back either of you up and then it goes thru any kind of HR procedure, which from reading your description of the employer there is none, So you end up in a court battle if you decide to push the matter

Boss could fire either one of you really or both to end the matter, there is still the possibility of retribution from the other guy cause he is a loose cannon and could just take the matter off work to settle it where it could then end up in a very worse scenario !

One of you is going to leave one way or the other, who is the most important to the employer will be the keeper, regardless of the past history, sad to say, but seen it many times !!

Good Luck !
Posted By: ILcooner

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 02:43 PM

Originally Posted by Kevin Colpetzer
The secret to winning any violent conflict is to be first, with the most. You left it go to far. Actions speak louder than words. When he opened his mouth you should have shut it for him


if so, he would be in jail right now
Posted By: ILcooner

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 02:45 PM

Originally Posted by Steven 49er
20 bucks an hour and no benefits? That is reason enough to quit.

Life is too short to be miserable at work, either tell the boss you are going to call a lawyer or quit.

If you are going to stay start documenting any new problems and sit down and write down past problems.


Make them fire you. Get a lawyer and hunt for a new job all at once.

Document everything. I would NOT quit though until you have a new job lined up
Posted By: ILcooner

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 02:48 PM

Originally Posted by Davisfur
I made it a point to keep enough of my wits about me as to not make any threats against him but I did stand my ground and fire back verbally. He was close enough to me and was threatening to the point that had I been armed (which is not permitted at work or I would have been) I would have used force against him. I'm a big strong guy but out of shape. This guy is lean and muscled and up until a couple of years ago fought MMA at some of the local Indian casinos. I'm not toeing the line with a guy like that. I hate this because it may very well be the death of our small company. We are both shop foremen over our respective shops and it will be a big loss either way it goes. The boss has wanted to fire this guy for a couple of years due to poor attendance, leaving whenever he feels like it and of course treating coworkers like garbage and being a general cancer to the company (the bosses own words) but won't do it because "we are shorthanded and behind and can't afford to lose anybody." Today was the first words spoken between this coworker and myself since the last time I had to go to the boss about him 4 or 5 months ago.


Who cares...their problem not yours (unless you own the company)

a company will fire you in a heartbeat for any reason or no reason
Posted By: Matt28

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 04:13 PM

Man I sure hope things get better for you. I am sorry to hear about all this bad luck, keep your head up. Just so everyone know 20 hour is good for small towns in Oklahoma, unless your a stupid with your money you can make it just fine at 20. If you have a wife with a job it's even easier but can have a fine life and support 2 people on 20. Not everyone buys new cars every 2 or 3 years. We pay 18+ to our welders here with quarterly bonuses. No problem getting workers we pay better then anywhere else in my poor county. Them are some nice crappie in that ponds you get to fish also.
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 04:15 PM

I came in and talked to the boss this morning. The guy I had the conflict with was here already and the boss had already gotten his side of the story which according to the boss was spot on with the story I told him yesterday in other words both our stories about what happened matched. The boss said given the evidence he had I was in the right and he would back me in whatever decision I decided to make because he knew the hand of cards I was holding but he hoped for the good of the company I could see it in my heart to give it another chance and if the guy so much as looked at me crossways he would have him removed from the premises by police. Also after hearing both sides of the story he sent the guy home without pay until I made a decision on what his fate would be at this company. I told the boss that I was not comfortable working around the guy and next time someone would most likely be hurt and he agreed. The boss knows I'm holding the best hand of cards in the situation because he let it get this far and he's basically begging me to give it another chance to keep from losing his company. Thing is if the other guy leaves he's taking another guy with him which is going to cut that shops workforce in half and slow it down considerably. If I go he loses my whole shop including a 25 year veteran hand that has this entire business locked inside his hard old head and my other hand that will not stay without me. Either way the company which is already backordered 15 months is not going to weather the storm well and if I force his hand and make him fire the guy I will spend the rest of my time here with tension and hard feelings between the boss and myself for what I did to his company. Not saying that's right but that's how I see this going. I know what the easy solution to this problem is but I also live in a very small town that for family reasons I can not move away from at the moment. In this small town what I do to this company matters and would spread like wildfire to other local employers leaving me with a scarlet letter on my chest. I still have not fully decided but I believe I am going to stay here but quietly go about finding another job.
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 04:18 PM

Originally Posted by Matt28
Man I sure hope things get better for you. I am sorry to hear about all this bad luck, keep your head up. Just so everyone know 20 hour is good for small towns in Oklahoma, unless your a stupid with your money you can make it just fine at 20. If you have a wife with a job it's even easier but can have a fine life and support 2 people on 20. Not everyone buys new cars every 2 or 3 years. We pay 18+ to our welders here with quarterly bonuses. No problem getting workers we pay better then anywhere else in my poor county. Them are some nice crappie in that ponds you get to fish also.

Thanks Matt I appreciate it. And yes you are right in small town Oklahoma $20 is pretty decent pay and all my bills get paid. I may not drive a brand new truck but I don't have a $500 payment either lol. I do get a production bonus every year and a fairly substantial Christmas bonus as well
Posted By: Lugnut

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 04:30 PM

I understand you are between a rock and a hard place and it's not your doing that got you there. But your decision to let it go and seek employment elsewhere seems like letting the arsehole win, feels like you're folding.

If there are any reasonable folks in your town and they know the story or care to listen to it 'm sure they would back you in a decision to have this guy fired. The arsehole's followers' and the unreasonable folks' opinions should not matter to you.

Your boss and his company is also in a pickle, I get that. But he has had more than enough time to make this right, he should have had another shop foreman lined up and gotten rid of the jerk after the first incident.

Leave now or in the near future and you just embolden the jerk, give him more power to be an arsehole to every other employee.

That's my two cents.
Posted By: Steven 49er

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 04:33 PM

Originally Posted by Davisfur
Originally Posted by Matt28
Man I sure hope things get better for you. I am sorry to hear about all this bad luck, keep your head up. Just so everyone know 20 hour is good for small towns in Oklahoma, unless your a stupid with your money you can make it just fine at 20. If you have a wife with a job it's even easier but can have a fine life and support 2 people on 20. Not everyone buys new cars every 2 or 3 years. We pay 18+ to our welders here with quarterly bonuses. No problem getting workers we pay better then anywhere else in my poor county. Them are some nice crappie in that ponds you get to fish also.

Thanks Matt I appreciate it. And yes you are right in small town Oklahoma $20 is pretty decent pay and all my bills get paid. I may not drive a brand new truck but I don't have a $500 payment either lol. I do get a production bonus every year and a fairly substantial Christmas bonus as well


Small town in NW MN with 250 people it's good pay as well but many of our 18 to 20 dollar an hour full time jobs come with some insurance and 401k.
Posted By: Steven 49er

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 04:34 PM

Originally Posted by Davisfur
Originally Posted by Matt28
Man I sure hope things get better for you. I am sorry to hear about all this bad luck, keep your head up. Just so everyone know 20 hour is good for small towns in Oklahoma, unless your a stupid with your money you can make it just fine at 20. If you have a wife with a job it's even easier but can have a fine life and support 2 people on 20. Not everyone buys new cars every 2 or 3 years. We pay 18+ to our welders here with quarterly bonuses. No problem getting workers we pay better then anywhere else in my poor county. Them are some nice crappie in that ponds you get to fish also.

Thanks Matt I appreciate it. And yes you are right in small town Oklahoma $20 is pretty decent pay and all my bills get paid. I may not drive a brand new truck but I don't have a $500 payment either lol. I do get a production bonus every year and a fairly substantial Christmas bonus as well


Small town in NW MN with 250 people it's good pay as well but many of our 18 to 20 dollar an hour full time jobs come with some insurance and 401k.

Matt, the newest vehicle I own is a 2011. 2 vehicles, one for me and the college age daughter.
Posted By: Oh Snap

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 04:52 PM

15 months behind in orders
Small town
He leaves and others leave
You leave and the business fails
TOO MUCH DRAMA

These are trying times. There isnít anywhere in the world thatís exempt from drama it seems. It sounds like your job may not be very secure anyway!
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 05:03 PM

You are probably right about that Snap.
Posted By: ~ADC~

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 05:12 PM

I wouldn't bet his buddy leaves with him. I'd have him fired, people like that won't change, it'll be a lot worse next time. Don't let him win. He's already had too many chances. Sounds like you could take over his job and do yours as well if it was done that way in the past. That's how I'd frame it to the boss too. Or you just walk out now. I bet you were looking for a job when you found this one. Good workers are in HIGH demand everywhere.
Posted By: hippie

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 05:27 PM

What would Coonman do?
Posted By: Moosetrot

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 05:34 PM

The choice to stay or not stay is yours and yours alone, and it is a tough one. My advice, given it seems you have the upper hand right now, would be that if you choose to stay you make it contingent upon a meeting, face to face, with you, your boss, and the bad guy...and another witness of your choosing. At that meeting you will lay out the conditions of you maintaining your employment there. If your conditions are not met you have no choice but to begin legal action against the company and the bad guy.

It is imperative that you DOCUMENT, and your witness documents every word that is said in arranging that meeting and what happens within the meeting. At the end, if it all seems to be going your way, I would request that all parties initial the notes made. If they refuse, turn the paper over and write "XXXX refused to sign" and ask them to initial the fact they refused to sign. In doing so, they are acknowledging the fact they reviewed the notes. I used that "trick" many times in my career successfully.

In the end, the line I have always used in attempting to meet resolution of a bad situation through a meeting, is "Is everyone comfortable with this?" Might sound silly but it is effective.

Good luck and please let us know how this goes. I also think it is time for you to quietly start looking for another job.

Moosetrot
Posted By: KeithC

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 05:46 PM

Originally Posted by hippie
What would Coonman do?


From years of experience, I can safely say Coonman would complain a lot in many different threads, repeatedly ask for advice, ignore it all and repeat the cycle ad nauseum.

Keith
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 05:52 PM

😂 Poor coonman
Posted By: Yes sir

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 05:56 PM

I don't know if I've ever worked somewhere were at some point feathers haven't got ruffled and one or both parties weren't mad enough to fight. Every situation is different but some of you guys go off the the deep end on what you think needs done based off one side of the story and a few paragraphs. Lawyers cops statements witnesses come on put your big girl britches on.

Davis fur you now what's best for your own situation. Do what you think is right once the emotions settle. My experience if you the right thing it usually works out for the best for u one way or the other. Just because the law says you can it doesn't always mean u should.
Posted By: KeithC

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 06:00 PM

Originally Posted by Davisfur
😂 Poor coonman


I feel sorry for him too, but realize his failure to try to improve his lot in life is the true cause of his woes.

I fear you are setting yourself up to live in a similar way to Coonman. You are working under unacceptable conditions and won't change them. You've been wrongly attacked 4 times and appear to be going to allow it to happen a fifth time. Your co-worker finally severely beating you may be the only thing that makes you change your lot in life.

Keith
Posted By: white17

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 06:03 PM

It seems to me that your boss is trying to make you the bad guy by putting you in the position of making the decision to fire this guy.

If I were in your shoes I would tell the boss to make the decision himself. If he chooses to keep the guy..then you walk. Either way he is going to lose someone.

If you acquiesce, it just delays the inevitable.
Posted By: Moosetrot

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 06:04 PM

Well, Yes Sir, my advice comes from over 25 years of dealing with hostile workplace, unemployment, and other such situations. I never lost a single one. I have a lot of tools that can be used, legally, in the pockets of my Big Boy britches. Davisfur can decide if he wants to use them or not.

Advice can be taken or not. I certainly hope he does not take some of the "advice" on here that will result in him spending time behind bars.

'Nuff said.

Moosetrot
Posted By: Tailhunter

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 06:06 PM

Just start laughing


It wrecks them.
Posted By: hippie

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 06:10 PM

Imo...1st time, yea just two guys having a bad day...shame on him?

After the second time and nothing done, shame on you.

Now, your spineless boss lays the decision on you....its not your job. I'd say he's scared to fire him.

Tell your boss, its his decision on who goes, not yours.
Posted By: Horn

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 06:10 PM

Dude, Your boss that is your friend is NOT your friend...If you are 15 months behind on orders what in the (This word is unacceptable on Trapperman) is he doing driving a tractor during business hours??

You say He is a Second amendment supporter: Running a No firearms allowed business??

He is using the "for the good of my business" crap on you...

If he was a friend you would not have to make these choices....

Think about it: Would you treat him the way he is treating you??

It sounds like the guy is a (This word is unacceptable on Trapperman) and is peeing on your leg and telling you its raining

BTW If you hit the Asshat with a hammer or otherwise do something that would require a court appearance Dig out the old fight announcement posters from the Events he fought in. It should help justify use of force.
Posted By: Oh Snap

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 06:13 PM

Moosetrot

25 years of hostile workplace.......WOW!
Posted By: Yes sir

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 06:17 PM

Originally Posted by Moosetrot
Well, Yes Sir, my advice comes from over 25 years of dealing with hostile workplace, unemployment, and other such situations. I never lost a single one. I have a lot of tools that can be used, legally, in the pockets of my Big Boy britches. Davisfur can decide if he wants to use them or not.

Advice can be taken or not. I certainly hope he does not take some of the "advice" on here that will result in him spending time behind bars.

'Nuff said.

Moosetrot

Yeah I've worked with people like this too. There's a time and place for legal intervention but they are rare and there's a lot of people (and getting to me more) that play this card out retaliation more than necessity. I guess I've never been good at feeding like a victim.
Posted By: Moosetrot

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 06:18 PM

All depends on whether he wants to win or lose if it goes that route.

Moosetrot
Posted By: Yes sir

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 06:21 PM

Win or lose is a lot of how you look at it
Posted By: henpecked1

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 06:22 PM

Sounds like he wants a date, explain to him he has to change his ways, clean up his act and stop yelling but compliment his 6 pack:: then if he gets aggressive you have him for sexual harassment; a much easier complaint to make stick. the only problem is you are in Oklahoma and you might also get tarred and feathered.

People with behavior based issues and tough guy syndrome need help: you are not going to provide it and the employer does not seem inclined to want to help

The guy has failed as a MMA fighter, works out at the gym with similar types, probably takes body enhancement .drugs, testosterone and was rejected by the local 1% biker club for lack of discipline (and no bike). Never been in the military. He is a wanna be, could have been, should have been.

Walk away, its a big world out there and life is to short, go be happy. if you elect to live your life in fear and be unhappy its your own fault. Move on.
Posted By: Oh Snap

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 06:26 PM

A job is a workplace. There is no room for fighting, legal actions or other drama. It would only last 5 minutes in my shop regardless of what difficulty it caused me!

Just show up on time do your job and your rewards are at the end of the week!
Posted By: Dan Barnhurst

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 07:57 PM

If you're seriously considering staying, I would insist on a meeting between the three of you in the bosses office to clear the air. You've got to break the tension, if possible, or it won't work out in the long run anyway.

I would calmly ask him if he admits that he was wrong in exploding at you in such a threatening manner when you obviously weren't knowingly or intentionally keeping him from the eyewash station. I would stay calm and listen and avoid getting in any argument. I would ask him if he can control himself and act in a civil and professional manner toward you in the office from now on.

I see this going one of two ways. He can't control himself again and ends up getting fired. Or you guys come to some sort of understanding and agree on some ground rules at work so you can keep it civil.

If you three can't even sit down in the bosses office together to work things out, it's just headed for a train wreck down the road where someone might get hurt and lives are ruined.
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 08:18 PM

I do appreciate everyone's input and advice and am trying to see the best path through this situation. I know that quitting is the most logical option but never have quit a job without having another already lined up and yes White17 the boss pretty much put it on my shoulders as to whether or not the guy gets fired but along with that he piled on the fate of his company hanging in the balance which will make me the bad guy for making that decision and I will have to live with the hard feelings between the boss and myself the rest of the time I'm employed here. On the other hand a worse fate for the company hangs over my head if I quit. It will be across every town within 20 miles that I walked out and left the company hanging high and dry. People here don't like that kind of thing whether you were in the right or not you'll never get the chance to explain it. Like Oh Snap said above "too much drama" and I hate it. I don't want to be nor ever wanted to be in this BS situation.
Posted By: Oh Snap

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 08:31 PM

If your happy where you are suck it up and do whatever it takes to stay. Lots of advice here to help you out. Legal to hurting someone!

We live in a free land and can move wherever we want for now anyway. Maybe itís time to go beyond the 20 mile barrier and start anew. These are the best timers to be looking for work. You might find something better and a boss that doesnít put his problem on your shoulders!
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 08:32 PM

Originally Posted by henpecked1
Sounds like he wants a date, explain to him he has to change his ways, clean up his act and stop yelling but compliment his 6 pack:: then if he gets aggressive you have him for sexual harassment; a much easier complaint to make stick. the only problem is you are in Oklahoma and you might also get tarred and feathered.

People with behavior based issues and tough guy syndrome need help: you are not going to provide it and the employer does not seem inclined to want to help

The guy has failed as a MMA fighter, works out at the gym with similar types, probably takes body enhancement .drugs, testosterone and was rejected by the local 1% biker club for lack of discipline (and no bike). Never been in the military. He is a wanna be, could have been, should have been.

Walk away, its a big world out there and life is to short, go be happy. if you elect to live your life in fear and be unhappy its your own fault. Move on.

Funny that you mentioned that stuff henpecked he actually used to be in a local biker group but got kicked out. He was also in the military and went to Afghanistan in the early part of the conflict. He was dishonorabley discharged for striking his commanding officer and then going AWOL. He was fighting all that legal mess when he started working here and still takes veterans day off work every year. He was also kicked off the local adult men's softball league for getting in a confrontation with a much older and physically weaker man than himself that ended with the older gentlemen producing a handgun and politely telling him he needed to leave.
Posted By: Ringneck1

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 08:44 PM

Davis, I am sure by now you feel overwhelmed by advice by now. I just say, be wary of the guilt trip that the owner is trying to push onto you to cover his own inaction. I wonder why he is so concerned about the business but unwilling to do what's best for his business? That creates more concern imo than the nutcase. Being the boss ain't easy, but few want to deligate tough decisions that impact the future of that business unless something is really wrong.

Good luck
Posted By: CTRAPS

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 08:52 PM

The guy you are working for may be the owner, your friend, whatever. One thing is for certain though, the owner isn't a manager, especially when it comes to managing his employees. Him basically saying the decision is yours as to whether or not the other guy stays, simply means your owner has no sack. Certainly he doesn't have anything to put in it if he does have a sack. He's taking the cowards way out. His lack of action or inaction may just be the reason your company is 15 months behind. Sounds to me like he can't make a decision on his own.

I think the owner should fire the karate kid, then have you take over the whole plant like he was going to do until macho man had a fit. The owner gets rid of one maybe two people, you run the entire shop, plus you get a decent raise too.

The decision is the owners, not yours.
Posted By: KeithC

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 09:00 PM

You worry way touch to much about what the people who live around you may think if you insist on the aggressor being fired or you quit. From what you have said, the people in your area probably already know the guy is an unstable jerk.

Keith
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 09:26 PM

The reason for the bosses inaction and willingness to let stuff slide comes from him never having to make hard decisions about this company. The company was started in the 80's by his father and started at the farm out of necessity like so many things do. The current owner went to OSU for a degree in business management but dropped out after 2 years to be a cattle hauler and help with the business when he felt like it. When the business started gaining ground and building he came back to help his parents with it but never really made any decisions about anything as his dad was a very strict boss who had no problem firing a whole shop full of guys if they didn't live up to his expectations. My uncle and our 75 year old hydraulic man are the only two employees left that were hired by the original owner. When the old man died the boss helped his mother continue to run the business until her passing but was never involved in the financial side of the business. When his mother passed his wife retired from teaching to help him run the business and that's where we are now. Having seen what his dad was like and the amount of people he ran off (sometimes for no other reason than he just didn't like him) he ended up taking the "I'm your buddy not your boss approach" and it has landed him in this situation where he's babied his employees so much they know they can get away with anything. There is not enough room to list all the shenanigans this one individual has pulled at this company that should have got him at the very least fired if not prosecuted.
Posted By: Nessmuck

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 10:34 PM

You got enough here for ÖJerry Springer !!
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 11:02 PM

Yes I know. I've never seen a small town in Oklahoma that wasn't full to the brim with drama. People seem to need it to live.
Posted By: Pike River

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/07/21 11:22 PM

Ask the boss to put him on a performance improvement plan. If he violates it, he is termed. In the mean time stsrt hiring.
Posted By: bacatrapper

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 12:16 AM

You should have took the crowbar to him. Weekends in jail arent that bad, you can take a nap.

I know when I have a problem, I ask people on the interwebs.

What did your uncle have to say?

crazy
Posted By: rex123

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 12:27 AM

The owner is not your friend or a boss if he won't step up. He knows this will blow over and neither of you will do any thing by past actions. It kind of like sitting a poker table put up or fold. If you go for it you have a chance but if you fold you walk away from the table you loose. After reading all these post I would say you have already folded. One excuse after another to not do anything. So tell me to shut up and go to (This word is unacceptable on Trapperman).
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 12:37 AM

Uncle was ride or die with me he was ready to kill the guy himself and save me the trouble. And I will not tell you that Rex you are entitled to your opinion just like everybody else is. If I wasn't open to all opinions I wouldn't have put it on the "interweb".
Posted By: Okie Farmer

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 12:55 AM

Originally Posted by Davisfur
Originally Posted by Okie Farmer
I can do some checking and see if there's any openings in the steel shop at GN2 if you want me to. I'm not sure where your from but have a fair guess.

Where is that located Okie? And yes Leftlane I was holding the bar, I picked it up because he was advancing on my position at a rapid pace all the while yelling and cussing at the top of his lungs. I'm pretty sure our stand your ground law covers verbal threats when the oppressed is in fear for his life.


Seiling
Posted By: Drifter

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 01:00 AM

Unless the boss grows him some cajoles that place is going to fold up sooner or later. He is putting the decision on you as he knows it has worked in the past.
Posted By: bacatrapper

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 01:07 AM

Its time to grow a set and bust some heads or find something else to do. I would crowbar the boss second.

If said miscreant looks really tough, get a bigger stick. You only live once, might as well have a little excitement.

I never minded jail in small town oklahoma, they always got food from the cafe.
Posted By: Dillrod

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 04:53 AM

If you really want to stay there. Tell the owner maybe it's time you move up the Ladder.
He needs help.
You can do it.

Use your skills.
No place but up.
Always have a plan for a positive outcome if a change is gonna happen.
You have a lot of control on your future right now.
Tell the owner Up the ladder or the guy goes.
Just my opinion on a better future.
If the guy leaves big deal someone will step up to the job.
Posted By: Feedinggrounds

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 08:25 AM

Every job, and every employee are replaceable in every case. Their is much more to the O/P story than being told. Coming from a mill operator with 14 rough and tumble men, that work hard and play harder. 4 of which are tough take no crap foremen at each work area.
Posted By: Badger23

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 09:59 AM

So in small town Oklahoma you can't quit a job to try something different. Well that's interesting. Changes my thoughts on Oklahoma a bit. The guys must only date 1 girl in their life and that's it.
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 03:28 PM

Originally Posted by Badger23
So in small town Oklahoma you can't quit a job to try something different. Well that's interesting. Changes my thoughts on Oklahoma a bit. The guys must only date 1 girl in their life and that's it.

I never said someone can't quit a job to try something different. I left a 12 year career as a Ford certified Master diesel mechanic to work in the welding shop I'm in now. What I'm saying is the owner of this company is a well known influential man in this area and if I do him wrong before I have another job secured there likely won't be anyone willing to hire a guy that walked out and left his employer high and dry and hanging in the wind. And as far as dating goes there are a lot of people I know who married and are still married to the first girl they dated including my granddad, dad, a cousin and 4 friends in high school that married thier first high school sweetheart. Is that a problem?
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 03:34 PM

Originally Posted by Feedinggrounds
Every job, and every employee are replaceable in every case. Their is much more to the O/P story than being told. Coming from a mill operator with 14 rough and tumble men, that work hard and play harder. 4 of which are tough take no crap foremen at each work area.

There really isn't anything else to the story. It boils down to the boss will not fire the guy unless I push his hand because as far behind as we are he is terrified of losing people seeing as how there have been no knocks on the door looking for a job. The last guy we hired was over 2 years ago and he's still here. Since he started there has been 2 job applications put in and both were rejected because the applicants were known thieves and drug addicts from the area. The last one of those applied over a year and a half ago. The boss has mentioned several times that he has thought about hiring south African workers like a lot of farmers have been doing but they have to be provided a house, vehicle and at least $15 an hour and he thinks that's too steep for guys without skills.
Posted By: white17

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 03:40 PM

I'll tell you what.............with your qualifications and experience you could make a much better living elsewhere working for yourself. Not criticizing whatever decision you make. Just saying that you have very marketable skills.
Posted By: Turtledale

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 03:54 PM

He was also kicked off the local adult men's softball league for getting in a confrontation with a much older and physically weaker man than himself that ended with the older gentlemen producing a handgun and politely telling him he needed to leave. [/quote]

Sounds like that man figured it out
Posted By: PVT Davis

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 04:32 PM

Well I've been reading all the posts and can't resist any longer so now here's my two cents in.
Has your boss considered posting job listings further away? as in broadening the horizons? Because unless there aren't many homes for sale in your community and $20/hr would sustain a small family in OK then there should be a few takers from out of town. But then again it is still a gamble.
And I am also with a earlier commenter about asking to be promoted to basically a GM type roll so the owner can do his thing while you can have full control what happens with hiring and what not. At least that's what I would do if I was the owner. So if you do get promoted, it'll give the guy basically a warning saying that his adversary is now his boss and it may drive him away without you firing him, and it won't make it look like your a bad guy in your town. And if he stays, then give him a warning that if he doesn't behave himself that you will be forced to let him go. But that's all if you can convince the owner to let you become GM, or better yet, buy part of the company and become part owner.
I have also witnessed a somewhat similar situation workout with a former coworker who didn't exactly get fired but was told to leave on there own so that they didn't get fired because if they didn't she would've. For she did a few things that even though we were starving for workers, it still wasn't worth it to keep her on. That's with paid training and everything.
But no matter what happens, I hope and pray that it'll workout for you in whatever way you take.

Sincerely in God's love

PVT Samuel Davis
Posted By: Oh Snap

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 04:53 PM

Davisfur
We are working right now on a job on a military base and one of the sub contractors has a crew of Haitians. The only problem is they donít speak English. The South African workers in your area might be a better option then the other options you mentioned!
Posted By: K52

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 05:43 PM

Originally Posted by Turtledale
He was also kicked off the local adult men's softball league for getting in a confrontation with a much older and physically weaker man than himself that ended with the older gentlemen producing a handgun and politely telling him he needed to leave.


Sounds like that man figured it out[/quote

The people in Skidmore, Missouri took care of their town bully. People get a belly full of abuse the table can turn.
Posted By: white17

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 06:02 PM

Ken McElroy. Good riddance !
Posted By: Badger23

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 08:22 PM

Nope nothing wrong with staying with the first girl you date at all. I know people that did the same. I wish you the best of luck. It's easy to avoid the drama if you want to.
Posted By: Davisfur

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 09:17 PM

Sometimes what seems like the easiest way isn't the best way and what's right isn't always the best option either. I know that the easy route is to walk out and take a better job somewhere regardless of whether I have to move to be closer to it but like I stated before I can not move away from this area at this point in my life for family reasons. Therefore I'm stuck with what jobs are available within reasonable driving distance. Jobs that could very well be dependant on what action I take towards the company I'm at. Also like I said before my boss is a pretty influential guy in this area and he's a member of the second largest church /gossip mill in this town and is friendly with half the people from the largest one.
Posted By: beavert

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 09:46 PM

.
Posted By: rex123

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 10:49 PM

Sorry but I have to post this .People have given you all kinds of advice and you have found a reason to toss it all. Any of it would get you out of the mess you are in. So here is my last post on this are you related to coonman?
Posted By: Feedinggrounds

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/08/21 11:18 PM

Originally Posted by Davisfur
Originally Posted by Feedinggrounds
Every job, and every employee are replaceable in every case. Their is much more to the O/P story than being told. Coming from a mill operator with 14 rough and tumble men, that work hard and play harder. 4 of which are tough take no crap foremen at each work area.

There really isn't anything else to the story. It boils down to the boss will not fire the guy unless I push his hand because as far behind as we are he is terrified of losing people seeing as how there have been no knocks on the door looking for a job. The last guy we hired was over 2 years ago and he's still here. Since he started there has been 2 job applications put in and both were rejected because the applicants were known thieves and drug addicts from the area. The last one of those applied over a year and a half ago. The boss has mentioned several times that he has thought about hiring south African workers like a lot of farmers have been doing but they have to be provided a house, vehicle and at least $15 an hour and he thinks that's too steep for guys without skills.

I hire green chain post stackers at $11.00 a hour. .50 cent raise at 30 days another .50 after another 30 days. No skills needed we teach, stack, band and stack some more. Show up on time everyday, 60 hours and time and a half after 40 hours. I get 3 to 4 apps a week. Maybe word has got out how miserable the place you work at is.....You're likely are not the only employee there unhappy with this guy. You have a counter reason to not make a change. So get a few sun dried possum tails handy, and ride it out. That's the direction your going, by your own words. He won, you lost, it happens.
Posted By: Jurassic Park

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 12:31 AM

You say your boss is a pretty influential guy in the area yet he has no contacts, no resumes/applications, no public desire to work for him. Sorry to say man, but your boss isnít all that you think he is.

If he was so great like you say, he would have a line up of people wanting to get in and work for him.

Iím starting to think this place is also mismanaged by the 2 foremanís.
Posted By: Jurassic Park

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 12:32 AM

Originally Posted by rex123
Sorry but I have to post this .People have given you all kinds of advice and you have found a reason to toss it all. Any of it would get you out of the mess you are in. So here is my last post on this are you related to coonman?


X2
Posted By: Marty

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 12:57 AM

if u get to a point that your tired of being a victim you will stand up for yourself or you will always be a victim.
Posted By: Blaine County

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 01:21 AM

Originally Posted by Jurassic Park
Originally Posted by rex123
Sorry but I have to post this .People have given you all kinds of advice and you have found a reason to toss it all. Any of it would get you out of the mess you are in. So here is my last post on this are you related to coonman?


X2


X3

Something isn't right about this story.

Could of, would of and should of parts of the story are meaningless. Either man up or take whatever you get.

Heck, I know lawyers in Oklahoma that have fought outside of the courthouse--multiple lawyers on multiple occasions. They could have been arrested and/or sued but at least they took care of business.

And, I don't know all of the facts but based on what I have read I really don't think you have any real legal leverage over the boss. .
Posted By: Boco

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 01:25 AM

I knew if this thread went long enough the mob would start to turn.
Posted By: Sharon

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 01:48 AM

A real boss won't leave it up to others to decide for him. He will take the bull by the horns and show real masculine leadership. Sounds like he wants the bully to target a fellow worker instead of himself.

I wouldn't even have a boss use me as bait decoy for an easier decision regarding a problem continually in the workplace.

I saw this from the beginning...not just now, Boco .... smile

Sheesh....
Posted By: SJA

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 01:51 AM

Absolutely correct in your observation Sharon!
Posted By: Blaine County

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 02:00 AM

Originally Posted by KeithC
Originally Posted by Boco
I knew if this thread went long enough the mob would start to turn.


This is just like a Coonman post, except the poster has a better grasp of the English language.

Their same basic format is "Woe is me, give me advice, I'm not taking the advice, woe is me, here's some more info., that doesn't change anything, I'm not taking the advice, woe is me..."

They frustrate people who want to help them because they won't man up and make their lives better.

Keith


I think it would be cool to meet the Coonman.
Posted By: Boco

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 02:14 AM

I love the coonman-hes the smartest guy on here.
Posted By: Lugnut

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 02:38 AM

I thought you said James was?
Posted By: martentrapper

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 02:42 AM

Your bully coworker knows all the reasons you explained to us of why you can't or won't leave the job or the town. He probably figures he just has to let things simmer down and he can do his bullying again.
From the info provided he appears to be the kind of guy who has to put others down to feel good about himself. Are there others in the shop, or around town, he bullies?
This is fun for him. What have you done to him, or that has effected him, that he regularly wants to pick on you?
Posted By: mad_mike

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 02:45 AM

Originally Posted by Boco
I love the coonman-hes the smartest guy on here.


Nope, he trails a close second to a member whoís name starts with a B, and rhymes with Boco. And I do mean that in the nicest way possible.
Posted By: Boco

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 02:57 AM

Originally Posted by Lugnut
I thought you said James was?

James was but coonman overtook him recently.
Posted By: BraskaYoter

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 03:25 AM

Well, cant ever get that 10 minutes of reading time back.
Posted By: Matt28

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 01:41 PM

I can't say I would have taken the same path as you have buddy. But you are a better guy then me I would have done did a bunch of bad stuff to this guy. Reading all this makes me realize I may need anger management classes. I couldn't be the bigger man in this case no way, I would have done been dreaming of how to ruin his hole life and anyone who likes him lifes also. I am a very vindictive person. Being that way has caused me to do somethings I am not proud of and has given me a not so good reputation. So there is nothing wrong with trying to keep people liking you. So just keep doing what you feel is right.
Posted By: Mike in A-town

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 02:32 PM

Talk to the boss in simple math and probabilities...

If you fire him, the company will be short-handed.

If he stays, you quit... And the company will be short-handed.

If he stays and you quit, how long until he cusses/abuses another employee causing them to quit? Which leaves the company even more short-handed.

Boss needs to decide who he wants to be stuck with when he's short-handed... Him or you.

Mike
Posted By: trapdog1

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 03:08 PM

Originally Posted by Boco
Originally Posted by Lugnut
I thought you said James was?

James was but coonman overtook him recently.

Coonman doesn't vote for democrats. He's obviously smarter.
Posted By: Lugnut

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 04:10 PM

grin
Posted By: Badger23

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 04:31 PM

Originally Posted by Jurassic Park
You say your boss is a pretty influential guy in the area yet he has no contacts, no resumes/applications, no public desire to work for him. Sorry to say man, but your boss isnít all that you think he is.

If he was so great like you say, he would have a line up of people wanting to get in and work for him.

Iím starting to think this place is also mismanaged by the 2 foremanís.


I had a reply very similar like this typed up yesterday and deleted it. I went with the short good luck instead. He seems to get angry with the advice he's given which is given with good intentions.
Yes he is the Oklahoma version of Coonman.
Ya know I think they should get rid of the other guy, Coonman can move from NE Iowa to Oklahoma and step right into a job at that place. Coonman has a lot of experience around a machine shop apparently. He needs a change of scenery and a new job. I think it would be a win win for both.
Posted By: Oh Snap

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 04:42 PM

WOWÖÖ181 comments and 5540 views and he is staying on the job and the thread is still going!

I think almost every regular contributor has given adviceÖAMAZINGÖ.LOL
Posted By: AJE

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 04:46 PM

Originally Posted by Badger23
Originally Posted by Jurassic Park
You say your boss is a pretty influential guy in the area yet he has no contacts, no resumes/applications, no public desire to work for him. Sorry to say man, but your boss isnít all that you think he is.

If he was so great like you say, he would have a line up of people wanting to get in and work for him.

Iím starting to think this place is also mismanaged by the 2 foremanís.


He needs a change of scenery and a new job. I think it would be a win win for both.
That does sound like a win win, Badger.
Posted By: Okie Farmer

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 05:10 PM

I've known a good hand to have his phone ring with another job by noon when his boss crapped on him.
Posted By: HayDay

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 06:11 PM

Do you know enough about the business to buy him out and run it yourself? Or at least offer to become general manager for now with buyout down the road. But you do the hiring and firing and get 2X the pay?
Posted By: Providence Farm

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 06:26 PM

Originally Posted by HayDay
Do you know enough about the business to buy him out and run it yourself? Or at least offer to become general manager for now with buyout down the road. But you do the hiring and firing and get 2X the pay?


Great idea but it sounds like he is making $20 an hour and no benefits. Unless he has other funding I bet that will be quite a stretch financially but I may be wrong.
Posted By: Feedinggrounds

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 07:21 PM

I think the O/P misunderstands the boss and his motives. He is obviously trying to get the o/p to leave on his own...Big shot boss and community leader he is, doesn't want to dirty himself firing the o/p. My mill crew will often run off the lazy guys before I fire them. The lazy crew member makes more work for everyone.
Posted By: 52Carl

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/09/21 11:56 PM

Originally Posted by Mike in A-town
Talk to the boss in simple math and probabilities...

If you fire him, the company will be short-handed.

If he stays, you quit... And the company will be short-handed.

If he stays and you quit, how long until he cusses/abuses another employee causing them to quit? Which leaves the company even more short-handed.

Boss needs to decide who he wants to be stuck with when he's short-handed... Him or you.

Mike

It appears to me that since the boss has put up with the loudmouth for as long as he has, he has already made his decision for who he intends to keep and who he will allow to just leave on their own.
Posted By: Jerry Jr.

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/10/21 12:38 AM

Originally Posted by 52Carl

It appears to me that since the boss has put up with the loudmouth for as long as he has, he has already made his decision for who he intends to keep and who he will allow to just leave on their own.


Lol, the op isn't going anywhere. He has made that clear. He bluffed to the boss and he was called on it. He could have put the ball back in the bosses court but he didn't (hence the bluff).

To the op, I do wish you the best. Your boss is not your friend. If he was he would have never put you in the spot that he just did. He is/was trying to use you as a scapegoat. Friends DO NOT do that. Friends have your back.
Posted By: trapdog1

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/10/21 12:48 AM

To recap:
The general consensus is your boss is a douche bag and should grow a pair of nads.
Posted By: Yukon John

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/10/21 01:06 AM

Davisfur, I checked out of this thread when it was 4 or 5 pages in...I would suggest you discuss this with your wife. You OBVIOUSLY don't want to leave this job, but you also OBVIOUSLY need a change! You two need to work out what's best for you, regardless of what we think. I hope you can find peace with your life, and wish you the best! God bless you and yours.
Posted By: Mark June

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/10/21 01:14 AM

Good post by Yukon John.
When married, a spouse needs to be on board (at some basic level) understanding the wonder that the two are joined together as ONE team.
Good luck Davisfur.


Blessings,
Mark
Posted By: T-Rex

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/10/21 09:37 PM

If this is episode #4 in eight years, episode #5 should be released in 2023.

The only thing to prevent that is your shop, hanging by a thread, may go bust first.

That is your future.

Decision time? Sadly, I doubt it.
Posted By: 52Carl

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/11/21 02:54 AM

Originally Posted by Jerry Jr.
Originally Posted by 52Carl

It appears to me that since the boss has put up with the loudmouth for as long as he has, he has already made his decision for who he intends to keep and who he will allow to just leave on their own.


Lol, the op isn't going anywhere. He has made that clear. He bluffed to the boss and he was called on it. He could have put the ball back in the bosses court but he didn't (hence the bluff).

To the op, I do wish you the best. Your boss is not your friend. If he was he would have never put you in the spot that he just did. He is/was trying to use you as a scapegoat. Friends DO NOT do that. Friends have your back.

"Lol"?! What's so funny?
I'm trying to figure our how your conclusion is any different than what I put forward.
Posted By: sneaky

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/11/21 06:31 PM

Originally Posted by Badger23
Originally Posted by Jurassic Park
You say your boss is a pretty influential guy in the area yet he has no contacts, no resumes/applications, no public desire to work for him. Sorry to say man, but your boss isnít all that you think he is.

If he was so great like you say, he would have a line up of people wanting to get in and work for him.

Iím starting to think this place is also mismanaged by the 2 foremanís.


I had a reply very similar like this typed up yesterday and deleted it. I went with the short good luck instead. He seems to get angry with the advice he's given which is given with good intentions.
Yes he is the Oklahoma version of Coonman.
Ya know I think they should get rid of the other guy, Coonman can move from NE Iowa to Oklahoma and step right into a job at that place. Coonman has a lot of experience around a machine shop apparently. He needs a change of scenery and a new job. I think it would be a win win for both.


I don't think coonman's truck will make it to western Oklahoma lol
Posted By: Trapper7

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/11/21 06:51 PM

It seems like we hear of workplace shootings too often these days. I would hate to see it come to that regardless. Sure, talk it over with your wife, but in the end the best option maybe to find another job.
If you are a foreman currently it means you are a shade better than the average worker in your occupation. So, it shouldn't be that tough to find something similar. I'll be praying for you to find the best solution for your family.
Posted By: ~ADC~

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/11/21 07:03 PM

Well what are you going to Davisfur? Are you letting him off scott-free? ,,,same as the last three times, or are you gonna stick up for yourself?
Posted By: run

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/11/21 07:30 PM

Originally Posted by Boco
Originally Posted by Lugnut
I thought you said James was?

James was but coonman overtook him recently.

LOL. I can't believe you said it.
Posted By: run

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/11/21 07:32 PM



I think it would be cool to meet the Coonman.[/quote]
I think so too.
Posted By: T-Rex

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/12/21 12:59 PM

It's just a matter of time before this Rube Goldberg shop implodes. In just a few posts from an employee I can visualize things that those too close to it can't
  • Two foremen competing rather than supporting each other
  • Employees, at least the foremen, coming and going as they please, instead of on the shop floor
  • An emergency eye wash station location out of sight, inaccessible, and remote from the shop floor.
  • An absentee boss that complains about labor shortages, but refuses to help, himself
  • Employee conflicts escalating to threats that are ignored
No need to quit that place; it will soon quit you. I just hope it happens before someone gets hurt.
Posted By: 1rivercabin53

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/13/21 12:45 PM

Just checking to see who's working and who got fired.
Posted By: Snowpa

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/13/21 01:13 PM

Two sides to every story especially when the boss backs down ,Seems someone thinks he is a valuable employee
Posted By: Dan Barnhurst

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/13/21 03:33 PM

It almost seems like the three main characters here have insecurities, and actually need each other in an unhealthy way. One needs to victimize and the other two need to be victims. Davisfur, I hope you turn this situation into an opportunity for personal growth and change so you can reach your own potential (for your own and your family's sake).
Posted By: Oh Snap

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/13/21 04:21 PM

If he was on 8 minutes ago he must not be working!
Posted By: yotetrapper30

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/13/21 05:26 PM

Y'all are sure a rough crowd. He made his decision, a lot of you don't agree with it, but so what? I made a similar decision once... and the person I would have been quitting to avoid (the store manager) got fired a month later. Another time, I made the decision you all think he should have made and the person I was quitting to avoid (also a store manager) quit 1 week after my last day! You're not living his life... so just let him live it, geez
Posted By: sneaky

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/15/21 05:06 AM

3 sides to every story. Your side, their side, and the truth
Posted By: trapdog1

Re: Cussed and threatened by coworker - 10/15/21 11:38 AM

Originally Posted by yotetrapper30
Y'all are sure a rough crowd. He made his decision, a lot of you don't agree with it, but so what? I made a similar decision once... and the person I would have been quitting to avoid (the store manager) got fired a month later. Another time, I made the decision you all think he should have made and the person I was quitting to avoid (also a store manager) quit 1 week after my last day! You're not living his life... so just let him live it, geez

Well, he DID ask. grin
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