Corporal punishment?

My great nephew was over on Christmas day for a while. Same as Thanksgiving. He is 8 and a complete terror. Running around constantly, punching and hitting, jumping on furniture and not listening to his mother and father. NO's and Settle down's from mom and dad had no effect whatsoever. My niece apologized a couple of times and said he was diagnosed with ADHD. I call BS! A good smack on the buttocks would have solved the problem. I almost did it myself a few times but didn't want to alienate my niece and her husband (we don't see them that much). A good smack on the rump will end things quickly, let kids know that the behavior won't be tolerated and is an education on civil manners. I think most of this ADHD and other crap is nothing more than an excuse for poor parenting or people that don't know how to parent. I'll give that caveat of maybe 15% actually have a real problem and that is being generous.

Yup. Early whoopings leads to only having to give "the look".

My kids know "the look". LOL!!! Most of the time I can just say their first name and give "the look" and things change quickly.

Son is the one of the smartest in his class and daughter just earned her associate degree at 17. Don't tell me it damages their psyche or some other crap like that.

It's biblical.

More Often than Not

The above being said, I think my niece is a loving parent but has no real idea how to parent effectively.

There's a huge difference between child abuse and a quick corporal correction, which is the only truly effective way to discipline a child before they are old enough to have a well developed sense of empathy. Sadly most people can't grasp that now. Spare the rod and spoil the child.

Part of loving a child or anyone else, is doing what's best, even when it hurts, which in the case of correcting a small child can be quite literal.

Keith

I have no kids but I COMPLETELY agree with you. Most kids these days need a good crack across the backside just to get their attention and to let them know who the boss is.

There is something about the sound of leather exiting belt loops in a hurry, that a kid don’t soon forget. Use to send me and my brothers looking for higher ground as fast as we could move.

IF you had watched a child with ADHD you would know a slap on the butt is not going to solve anything.
Before getting too judgmental I would do a little research or reading on ADHD.

I like to think I'm enough smarter than a child that I can find a way to make them behave without hitting them.

That's only if the diagnosis is correct. I believe that most aren't and done by quack doctors. Lord only knows what I would have had back in the 70's if these quacks existed and people believed it.

Meh, we are not talking child abuse here. We are talking corrective action with no harm other than knowledge and understanding given at the primal instinct that any animal understands.

My mistake I thought you talking about hitting the kid because you're not smart enough to find another way to make them behave.

What are you going to do when the "corrective action with no harm other than knowledge and understanding given at the primal instinct" doesn't work? Hit them harder, more often?

[ Don't get snippy, I'm just debating my opinion.

Who's snippy? I put a on there.

Reading into it. That's not what I said. How about controlling your emotions a little. We can have a civil discussion about it but you are already off the rails.

I had my fair share of arse whoopings as a kid. My Dad got no joy from them but they were certainly effective. Each and every one of them I earned all on my own.

I never hit my kids. EVER!!!

Raising young children requires basic understanding. Cookie good. Pain bad.

The pain may be from denial of what they want, standing in a corner and not moving, or as a last resort, a spanking.

When I hear people start talking about comparing spanking to hitting I think the same of their methods of parenting as they think of mine. I can count on one hand how many times I spanked each child. I didn't bruise anything on them. I don't think their skin even turned red. It was an attention getter at the top of the punishment ladder that they deserved because they didn't listen and were too wound up.

Spanking is not hitting. Kids were raised on corporal punishment for centuries. Then Dr. Spock and other "smarter" shrinks decided it was evil.

In looking at a lot of kids of today and their parents who were raised in this fashion, I do not see better kids or results. When I was a young elementary kid who got spankings, chewing gum was the biggest problem in school. Think about the big problems in today's elementary schools where kids do not get discipline at home or at school.

Good grief!!!

X100

I just read what you wrote. I didn't read into it, in fact I quoted it word for word. You think its ok to hit kids, I don't. There are better ways to make them behave than beating them. It's not my fault if people aren't smart enough or are too lazy to figure those ways out.

Yes it is. That is the exact definition of it.

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/dictionary/english/spanking

"the act of hitting someone with the hand, usually several times on the bottom as a punishment or for sexual pleasure:"

It's fascinating to me how some parents and non parents think every kid will be mentally damaged if they get a spanking.

Every child has different levels of understanding. Some will cry if you are disappointed in them. Some will only cry if you spank them.

Next thing "intelligent" people will say is that it will damage a child's psyche if you make them cry.

Because of the respect I was taught first with pain from spankings and and arm grab or two, I learned how much more painful it was when my parents would look at me with disappointment. I would take a spanking over that look any day.

No, you're calling people that have agreed with me and myself stupid and lazy. You are not presenting any point, fact or real alternative. You're just calling people names. I'm just reading what you wrote, by the way.

So is hitting the same as striking or slapping?

No, we are talking about a swat on the butt of a misbehaving toddler or very young child.

So you need me to tell you how to make kids behave without hitting them?

Sorry the question was directed at adc.

You and I agree finster.

I already answered that bowhunter, in fact I posted a link to the dictionary with the definition of spanking, then quoted it, in case you didn't have time to click on the link.

Ok, I've made my opinion clear. You all go ahead and beat your kids if you want to. Good night.

I agree their are effective non physical methods of discipline. I used them all. I did not however ignore the use of spankings.

It was gradual climb up the ladder after all other forms of discipline were exhausted. It is also effective in immediate reinforcement to stop a child from doing dangerous behaviors like running out into the street or any other life endangering action.

So if it said striking would that make you feel better since hitting is such a harsh term?

Ok. Thanks and good night.

As someone with ADHD who grew up picking switches and the like....egh it kinda works it's good to have as a possible outcome to bad behavior but like never seemed to effect me like normal kids

Was your psyche damaged and do you suffer from anxiety and depression because of it?

Your questions have been asked and answered many times. Good night.

Spanking isn't child abuse .
It's getting their attention .
I never liked to spank my kids , but when they needed it , pushed the envelope too far , yes they got spanked .
Funny thing is it only took a few times , and they knew not to push things too far again .

As far as ADHD , sorry but IMHO is just another made up excuse for selling more Pharmaceuticals .
Never heard of it until the government stopped corporal punishment in schools !
Talk about causing a division of the people , and the downfall of society .
Like Hitler , DR Spock destroyed many lives .
Thing is the DR is still destroying lives .

Must have been.... He's a trapper!

Agree 100%

X2

Punishment for not doing right is not the same as was, just like most anything else in this world isn't

Staying in the past does not make one correct either about doing things in today's age.

Might be that many in today's age do have more tendency's to misbehave that need better resolution than slapping them around due to many things not known back when physical abuse was the norm. I lived it I know what I'm talking about. There is a real thin line between a swat on the bottom verses constant re-directing to not be a bother to others, especially impatient adults !

I was able to correct bad behavior with a stern voice and direct education about the merits of bad behavior with my children because of what may parents did to me when I was younger because of their impatience. I made a decision that if I ever had children I would find another way besides making them cry to correct miss behavior, seems it worked out !

Just as many adults need more education and patience in today's world as well, there are several I'd like to give a good knocking to because of the way they behave, but I choose to just shake my head instead, which only seems to make them act worse !

I mean I do have both anxiety and depression and according to the shrink yeah it played a part in it but what y'all call a spanking and what I do are probably two separate things

At least you are able to differentiate between a spanking and hitting.

Sorry for your anxiety and depression. As smart as you are, I don't believe a spanking contributed in any way to any of your conditions. I am sorry for the actions that caused your internal pain.

Prayers for you.

Have you ever raised any animals ?
They snip their young when they need it .
Dogs , cats , rabbits , seen them all put their young in their place .
It's part of teaching , just like in the days when a doctor was hundreds of miles away .
Parents would stick their toddlers hands in the fire place to teach them not to play with fire .
Sure it hurt the child , but it more than likely saved their lives also .

To clarify so others don't misunderstand you, toddlers hands were put very close to the fire to feel an uncomfortable heat so they did not get burned.

Some people on here will think you meant shoving the kids hand into the fire until it was blistered and the child was writhing in the floor in agony.

For thinking people, that concept is very easy to understand. For the non thinking people, well..........

Ohio, LOL, I'd like to think the human being is above this animal instinct, but having read this thread and replied to it as well,
it seems we may never evolve out of the animal kingdom !

Animals lick their own butt too.

Ok, ok, I'm really done this time.

In Montana is 45-3-107 I kept a copy very handy when my kids lived at home .

Make sure of your target if and when you spank a kid .

Thank you you're right .
Sad that even though people today see the things that are happening today that didn't happen back 60-70 years ago , all after the government stepped in with DR Spock's teachings .

Most humans can't kill their own food.

Who's the dummy?

SMH

I had 3 boys that needed a smack on the butt when they got out of line. The 4th had a good chance of being a nut case if I kept spanking him. Each kid is different. Adjust as needed is my opinion

If parents don't discipline them when they are young, the government will be forced to discipline them when they are adults; fines, prison, etc..
And it's always tougher to teach old dogs new tricks.

I don't know either , I was the youngest of 5 boys , 3 older sisters and two younger sisters .
Trust me I was beat up often by older brothers .
I became a loner , did things without my brothers .
Hunted and trapped , until they became interested in what I was doing .
Taught them what I knew , and was never told thank you .
But when hunting they always asked me for advice .
It doesn't matter , as I had my butt spanked by more than my parents .
Strange I didn't ever think about killing anyone but my brothers when I was little .
Never wanted to kill anyone and even though I've killed my pet rabbits, chickens , cows for dinner , and hunted before my brothers did .
Killed thousands of animals , never had a thought of killing or disrespecting others !
Never was mean to animals or children , but did spank them when needed while young .
Only God knows why .
There's plenty of humans ( civilized ) that lick each others butts , and would their own if they could !

There's plenty of humans ( civilized ) that lick each others butts , and would their own if they could !

8 seems a bit late for spankings and especially from a great uncle. Adhd is real and you will not beat it out of a person. You say you rarely see this family yet you can diagnose the child's brain chemistry. Good on ya bud, I'd have kept those thoughts to myself.

Were you spanked as a child? And I don't believe you're done. You haven't had the last word.

I was youngest of 4 rough and tumble semi farm boys. Mom and grandma next door who raised 15 kids, 10 boys and 5 girls, had very well honed spanking skills. They were not all full on whoopins. Most were 1 or 2 warning swats, not heeding the warning often resulted in a formal set of 6 to 8 well aimed swats. We all earned every one fair and square. We all grew up with Respect, no criminal records, always rushed home to take care of or help aging or in need relatives. And all these years later, all of us whooped kids still maintain the same ties, even though those awful parents and grandparents that "hit" us kids have long ago left this earth. I can say the same adults that swatted us would also gather us kids around for story time, bible readings by grandma, pass out poor folk gifts and treats made for all us kids, even if you got the full on whoopin 2 hours prior. Best childhood ever.

Quite a few years ago my brother in law and sister in law were here with their twin boys. They were about 6-8. Just about completely feral . I had been doing some painting and had some of those paint mixing sticks on the coffee table. I grabbed one twin in one hand and a paint stick in the other and gave that kid 3-4 quick smacks. His brother ran out the door. Mom and dad got mad and left. But neither one ever ignored uncle danny again when I said no.

a kid running amok in my house is going to be reined up.

The first wife had friends with a “energetic” kid. They came over one day and he started his Tasmanian Devil routine and I put a stop to it. The parents kept commenting how he was a different kid when he came to our house.

Month later we are over to their place and the kid pushes the tv off the tv stand then starts stomping his ice cream in the recliner (the ice cream was to make him be good lol). They turn to me and ask me to say something to him. I said to them, “This is your house, not my place to say anything. I just wasn’t going to let him destroy ours.”

My stepson has ADHD. Spanking didn't work. Taking everything from his room except his bed didn't work, he would just sleep. Etc.,etc.
When he was about 14, him and his buddies got in what they thought was an abandoned mobile home. Kicked holes in the walls, broke windows, etc. When I found out about it from the sheriff's office, I had enough. I proceeded to grab him by the scruff of the shirt, place him with enough force against the wall to get his attention, then told him if it ever happens again I would be using my fist to correct the problem. That worked, never had anymore trouble of that sorts with him again.

what I seen as a law enforcement officer most parents want to be their child's best friend instead their parents.
Yes there is a difference between spanking and a beating and yes there are those with ADHD which have to be handled different.

I also believe if those I want to be your best friend parents had spent more time of being a parent there would be a lot less kids in trouble.

Problem is the rest of the world has to live with the monsters you raised.

Like I stated in my OP, I believe most of these ADHD diagnoses are hokum. I would like to meet some of these doctors. I'll bet most are quacks. I don't trust doctors much these days. Most are glorified drug dealers. They want to give you a pill for everything. Where was all of this ADHD back in the 70's and 80's when I was a kid growing up? There was no such thing. Your parents straightened you out. No pills, no drama, no problems. There are plenty of quack doctors out there today. Just look at all of this gender crap and the quacks that mutilate mentally ill people for a buck.

Finster the parents have to be straightened out first

there are a lot of parents that fall into this catagory. unfortunately all we do to fix the issue is give the kid a label and allow it

My Sister's first child was a boy who was perfect and never needed disciplined. Her second was a girl that had to have her fanny spanked to straighten her out. Every kid is different. I have a Grandson that won't behave and his parents give up on corporal punishment. They worst they can do to him is take away his electronic devices. He insists on being mean to his sisters, lies, etc. and nothing is his fault. He will probably be a computer genius one day though.

There are rungs on the punishment ladder most parents don't even want to get hold of much less do it. You were forced by your child's misbehavior to do that. You reached your max level. Some children require higher levels of correction. I am sorry you had to go to that level but I am more glad it corrected your son. I can't imagine how you felt afterward.

It is so much easier to give the child a pill than it is to tell the parent to be a........... PARENT!!!!

The kids suffer even worse when going this route. It is like putting a band aid on something that needs stitches.

Yup, I blame my sister. She was one of the "friend" parents that never disciplined her kids at all. Now, my niece doesn't have the skills or know how to really deal with misbehavior.

When all 6 of us boys would line up for a spanking my mom would use a ping pong paddle because her bare hand would wear out by the end. You wanted to jockey for a position closer to the end, when her arm was tired. Lol

My mom used wooden spoons and could wield a yardstick like a Ninja warrior. She used to grab those paddle ball games off of us too. Soon as the rubber band that held the ball broke.

If you can do that ADC ....get it on video

Just don't post it here

Bahahaha and that last line right there is why its such a big deal to double dip a chip at a party lol sorry couldnt resist

as with the spanking i wasnt just spanked i was beat as a child and spanked back handed across the mouth slapped punched and well i didnt turn out too bad. now i have spanked my kids when it is warrented. they have not been beaten but a good smack arcoss the rear really got their attention. now i have a 14 13 and 11 year old that listen and know what the look is and they best start acting right. my kids will all tell you they only get a spanking if they really deserved it because of their behavior. all 3 are a b students and play multiple sports and have no social issues. they will also be the first kids to call out the bad behavior of another child and say dang if we acted like that we'd get a whoopin so they have learned that its better to just behave. i do not like hitting or punching but a solid smack on the rear works wonders.

i was diagnosed with ADD and ADHD at 12 years old by a doctor. i think i was just a wild boy that needed to be put in check. i can say looking back that 95% of the whoopins i got i (This word is unacceptable on Trapperman) sure deserved i thought i was the man of the house when my dad left when i was 12. coincedence that dad left at 12 then i get diagnosed at 12 with add adhd????? could be but i think i thought i could do what i wanted since i was now the man of the house even though i had no idea how to act like a real man at that age.

I think that's a good philosophy and one I've tried to live by. It is absolutely imperative that a parent DISCIPLINE their children - especially their fathers. Corporal punishment may be the most brutish way of doing that. But it IS one way. It's is much better to employ corporal punishment as a means of disciplining a child than providing no discipline at all. But overall, I think more gentle means of correction are generally more effective.

I notice a big difference in the way my sons react to me and my wife. When they were little, I gave them much more sever punishment for disobedience or disrespect. I gave spankings on occassion but more often it was lots of pushups or hard physical labor - even for a grade school kid. My wife, by contrast, tended to yell and impose much less severe punishment. I'm not sure she ever spanked them hard enough to really make it hurt.

Now that the boys are junior high age, I notice a big difference in how they respond to their mother vs. how they respond to me. My wife can tell the boys to do something and nag and holler at them and they practically ignore her. But if I step up and gently whisper to them that they had better obey their mother... man they snap into action RIGHT NOW. I've tried in the past to discipline them for not obeying their mother but that never really took effect. They just never learned to fear her. Now my boys are so easy for me to get along with. I never have to raise my voice to them or worry about them not doing what I say. I can be so much more gentle with them now and I think they are more willing to listen to my words of advice because I don't need to yell at them and scold them. I can talk to them and show respect to them as young men because I taught them to fear me when they were little. It's such a joy to be their father.

I'm not saying I'm a great father or that I have the answers. One thing I know for sure is that kids are all different. But in my limited experience, demanding that they behave when they are little will make life much easier when they get older.

Haven't read the whole thread but results speak louder than ideas. Look at today's generations and the generations that we call America's greatest generation. Then compare the likelihood of getting your but whooped for each generation. Results seem clear

If you don’t discipline your children and teach them respect when they’re young, don’t expect to be able to do it when they can’t make it in life and return home to live with you. Think you’ll get respect then? Yeah, ok 🤣 . My house, my rules, I’m paying the cost to be the boss, and I’m allot bigger than you are. 👍

Very good philosophy.

Corporal punishment when they are young
Less needed as they mature
They'll be your friend as they age.

Otherwise the law will have to do what the parents didn't WANT to do

My stance

Seems to be pretty simple. Discipline a child in the way that it works best for them. I don't think that anybody on here wants to beat their children. Some need spanked, others just need you to raise your voice and they start crying. I'm sure that some would disapprove of me smacking my 1 year old's hands away from things that he shouldn't be in and call me abusive. Regardless, I won't let a child rule my house or go crazy in it. I remember as a child that both of my brothers were slow learners. They liked getting a belt taken to them and eating soap apparently. I didn't care for either. I got spanked one time and had soap in my mouth one time. Not a fan of the feel of leather slapping me or the taste of irish spring. Funny thing is, all 3 of us have done well for ourselves and have no hurt feelings from being disciplined. How strange.

Finster--Do you have any kids?

I always wondered how I would discipline my kids one day. Then I started training dogs from the time they were puppies. Got to be real clear that one day when I'm a parent my kids will be disciplined the same way I was: a good ole fashioned spankin'

I look at so many people the same age as me (mid-20's) and their lives are completely off track. I'm not saying I'm better than them, but I'm thankful I was disciplined as a kid and had some home training. It's clear many did not

I meet a lot of people with my job and see teenagers running parents' houses and same with their pets. All a consequence of NO BOUNDARIES. Kids and pets need to learn who is the boss is early in life. Wooden spoons and some leather when they are young are just some of the necessary tools. I started giving out wooden spoons as baby shower gifts. Some folks didn't see understand - same one that had bad kids and dogs

Spare the rod,,spoil the child.Seemed to work for a very long time.When I see bad kids,,I want to smack the parents.

A similar analogy that was once said, " I've never met a bad dog, only bad owners" :-)

Kids have got to pay their taxes. Use your head and keep them in the lower brackets.

I remember getting swatted a time or two for things I didn’t even do. With six boys I guess it was hard to keep track of who did what Lol. Good lesson there too though, don’t snitch and life isn’t always fair.

I see a lot of adults these days who may have benefited from an undeserved swat back in the day.

"I've always believed the mind is the best weapon."

John J. Rambo

They're children--if you can't out smart them I guess you have to spank them? I've never hit mine and they turned out just fine.

To me it is so sad that some people have to resort to making something normal sound ugly so they can think they can win an argument.

A spanking is not hitting.

Hitting is not spanking.

I don't care what flipping judge or shrink or doctor says it is.

If people wish to have a coherent and logical conversation it would be nice for them to be able to distinguish between the two.

Some people just like to argue. My wife for instance.

Let's be honest. Many people in Today's World can't or won't be able to comprehend the difference between abuse, discipline, and constructive correction.
PS, just because they're defined in a "dictionary" doesn't necessarily make them correct.

I raised three girls. Never laid a hand on them and neither did my wife. Like ADC said, I was enough smarter than them to figure out ways to make them listen without hitting them. All are successful, hard-working, well-adjusted adults now (shameless dad brag).

I also played a large role in raising my granddaughter. not because she had bad parents but because her dad was killed when she was a baby and I left her and her mother live here for nine years. No one ever hit her either. She's twelve now and is turning out pretty darn good. She's a heck of a fisherperson, she's dispatching and skinning fox and starting to show real promise as a hunter (shameless granddad brag).

That's my resume and makes my opinion valid.

If you are not a parent your opinion means little to me. I suspect a lot commenting here are not.

Gritguy, ADC and Kart got it right. So did coondagger with his reference to dog training. You have to establish yourself as the alpha. Dogs and kids will test that dominance frequently.

Boys may be different. I have limited experience, next to none, raising them. I do have a five-year-old grandson who stays here often. He seems to enjoy testing his boundaries. I have established myself as his boss. He says I'm mean but admits he knows I love him. He knows if he pushes the boundaries of good behavior I'll push back. I haven't had to spank him and don't think I will have to but won't rule it out.

My brother and I were hellions and frequently got "the belt" when our father got home and were made to stand on the basement stairs awaiting our punishment.. It didn't really deter us all that much. I think if my parents had used my methods they may have been more effective.

So if other dumb people spank their children it's hitting but if you have to resort to corporal punishment it's spanking.

Got it.

Good grief!!!

I never remember getting the belt on my butt for something I didn't deserve it for.

I got soap 3 times and deserved it twice

I haven't had to spank hit him and don't think I will have to but won't rule it out.

Feel better now bowhunter?

Nope.

Once again, hitting is not spanking and spanking is not hitting.

Spanking is open hand popping a kids butt.

Hitting is using your fist to hit something to injure or break it.

It is such a shame I have to explain this to grown men.

All I know is a three year old doesn't understand why running out into the street is a bad idea. They do understand if they do it they will get a swat. Now if you want to chase and catch a little kid every time your in town or whatever its fine by me.

Telling someone else how to raise their kid is more than a little arrogant.

The fact that our country got built and produced so many amazing people is proof that smacking a kid once in awhile wont hurt their tender psyche. No matter what the psycho babblers are babbling.

If you think Dr Spock was a child rearing genius then dont spank your kid. This is America.

Being spanked is a humbling experience. You can tell who here was spanked and who was not, and needed a couple more.

Thank God my parents whooped my tail. I honestly would probably be in prison right now if they hadn’t. I laughed at some of these comments. Make them stand in a corner and be still? And if they don’t, lol. Spankings work regardless of what some may think. I can go to any store/restaurant/church, etc…and tell you what kids have been spanked and what kids haven’t. The ones that haven’t are the ones you want to take your belt off and give the parents a good swat because their kids are pure terror.

Now, after saying all that, I now have an Autistic child with ADHD. A spanking wouldn’t phase him one bit and I did research when he was a baby and never gave him one when he was younger. Time out worked to an extent, but taking something he really enjoyed did more than anything else. He learned quickly. Now that he’s older, 7, he has gotten a swat or two and it definitely gets his attention and he understands I mean business. In my opinion, ADHD is an excuse parents use for bad behavior and not being the Alpha over their children. My wife’s niece had a child like what was mentioned and was over once and slapped my wife when she told him no. Before I could get out of the chair, my oldest grabbed that boy and knocked a little sense into him and made him apologize to his momma. My niece and her husband literally sat dumbfounded. I don’t know if they were embarrassed or really ticked, but they haven’t been back to visit in the last 10 years, lol.

Wasn't the best feeling but I meant it and he knew it. I guess I did my job okay, he's now a mechanic for a local car dealership instead of learning how to mechanic in the Department of Corrections. I suspect that's where he was headed.

Your house, your rules, tell them to go home or start the swatting. Why post it on here you want a quorum to make it right. Maybe the Kid is ADHD if there is a doubt then let it be, your not a doctor or child psychologist, do what ya want its your home.

Danny writes


I don't see anyone telling others how to raise their children here, I do read a lot of examples of how others raise theirs though.

In our country, still, there remains a civil discourse about doing things even if others do not like the way it's done, still does not make either right or wrong, it just makes it different !

I chose to not raise my kids the way I was disciplined up by a Neanderthal of an adult male, I'm very happy to have broken that procedure and my kids choose to do the same, other ways do work, regardless of what others think !

I always laughed inside when I’d see a parent doing the counting deal. “Tommy stop that right now, ONE,….TWO,…… TWO AND A HALF………”

I would always wonder what they did if the kid was running towards a busy street, count faster?? Lol

Coondagger, you cannot use shock collars on kids unless it is the lowest settings. After that the vibration setting will have them sitting up straight. OR, a good rolled up newspaper will get a kids attention fast. I hope you have several kids, you'll be a great PARENT!

That's funny.

There is a difference between corporal punishment and getting beaten by raging adults and I had the experience so I feel I know the difference.

Bryce

Parents used to tell me before a whipping “ one day your going to thank us for this “ AND THEY WERE RIGHT!”

Instead of hitting the kid,just smash one of his favorite toys with a sledge hammer.
Similar to an Adult getting a fine,only more dramatic.

I recommend this book: Gentle Measures in the Management and Training of the Young

Quote

The principles on which a firm parental authority may be established and maintained, without violence or anger, and the right development of the moral and mental capacities be promoted-by methods in harmony with the structure and the characteristics of the young mind. It is possible, that in the minds of some people the idea of employing gentle measures in the management and training of children, may seem to imply the abandonment of the principle of authority, as the basis of the parental government, and the substitution of some weak and inefficient system of artifice and maneuvering in its place. To suppose that the object of this work is to aid in effecting such a substitution as that-is entirely to mistake its nature and design. The only government of the parent over the child that is worthy of the name, is one of authority-complete, absolute, unquestioned authority. The object of this work is, accordingly, not to show how the gentle methods which will be brought to view can be employed as a substitute for such authority-but how they can be made to aid in establishing and maintaining it.

It says 2013 but the book was originally written back in the 1800's. You can also listen to it for free in an audio book at librivox.org.

I was always a proponent of spanking as the backbone of a discipline program. But this book helped me see that there may be more effective means. I still spanked my kids. But fortunately, I didn't have to do it very often.

Yeah, let's make sure the ADHD diagnosis is correct.

Then search the internet for qualified Dr's podcasts concerning kids diets that misbehave continuously.

Many times poor behavior can be at least reasonably reduced by getting most of the junk food out of the diet.

Parents need to do their homework.

Maybe drug therapy is NOT the best solution.

we never "spanked" our kids - we called it training the heart - and every single time their heart was trained it was their choice - they all knew what the consequences were ahead of time for their behavior. We laid out the rules and the consequences for breaking the rules and stayed consistent -when my kids were punished it was their choice. it was up to them to weigh the risks- we never "trained their heart" in public, never out of anger, and always in private away from their siblings - As the older one tested his limits the younger ones caught on quick - stay between the ditches and life is pretty good.

I can attest to some of this. It seems that my kids really act up after having food in it that has food dye, especially red candy of any kind.

We moved from Wisconsin to Minnesota in 97' I was burning two barrels for a week and a half to get our collection into Uhauls biggest truck. Anyway one of my 4 kids 12 down to 6 burned our
"Spare the rod" tiny canoe paddle.

The Love taps on their rear end continued in Minn. But less and less as they were already trained ....mostly

I have 4 kids under the age of 11. 2 of them I can just look at them and they straighten right up(they are natured like their mother) but the other 2 which are so much like myself it's scary, I have to pop their butts from time to time. Sometimes we take stuff away as punishment but seems to me in certain situations that a spanking is the best solution. Every kid is different, I bet I will never have to spank the 2

That sums up my approach. I always sat them down and explained why they were being punished/disciplined/corrected. Always three swats with a little space between each. They acknowledged it and then we cleared the air afterward. Always calm, a few tears and some hugs.

Got this from my traumatized daughter a few months ago. She is now the mother of four of her own. A great little mom.

I know that's right

Yes, every kid is So different