Stupid Police Reports in the News Paper

From what I can see, the daily disapointment (as I call our local news paper) doesnt have much to print these days, so I am going to post some of the stupidest police reports I see.

» At 7:21 p.m. Sunday, a Wisconsin Rapids woman reported a group of about 10 children used a brick to kill a squirrel in the 1400 block of 29th Avenue South, then threw the dead squirrel in the road.

» At 8:35 p.m. Sunday, a Grand Rapids woman reported water from a neighbor’s sprinkler was hitting her fence in the 1000 block of Whitrock Avenue Grand Rapids.

» At 2:36 a.m. Friday, a Nekoosa man reported his father was acting crazy and trying to poison him

Drivers Monday morning on Third Street in Wisconsin Rapids were slowed as a large turtle crossed the road.

At 7:33 a.m. Monday, authorities received the first report of a large turtle on Third Street, according to the police log. Shortly after, another caller reported the turtle was blocking traffic.

The turtle was about 2 feet across, Wisconsin Rapids Police Lt. Bryan Krzykowski said. It was making its way to a field with fresh grass just north of Riverview Medical Center. Authorities let the snapping turtle continue its slow journey, Krzykowski said

Sounds like a typical day in Wood County to me. I doubt the 2:30am incident was alcohol related

I know, Right? I think anywhere else in the WORLD, the police would tell the caller they should leave the home. Probobly some 50 year old that is still living in the basement.

» At 12:43 p.m. Wednesday, a woman reported a man was stalking her on Facebook.

» At 12:55 p.m. Wednesday, a caller reported a foam minnow bucket rolling around Baker Street, near Fifth Street.

Im out of ammo guys, feel free to contribute stupid calls to the police from your area.

I should of kept a list of them after 33 years in Law Enforcement I heard a lot of them

Thats the main thing in the local paper also. Oh and the ads.....

The realy stupid part is that they will respond to the minnow bucket in the street call.

Cop's can only eat so many donuts. A cat up a tree gets front page coverage in the small town "Tattle Tale Tribune". LOL

How about a lady calling the police to report somebody dumping piles of dirt on her new sodded-lawn ??

(she had a mole problem)

An old widow lady sits by her window. She saw a cop pull up to a bridge within her sight, and saw him dump a live coon from a cage trap into the water. This made the paper. Why I ask? He was drowning the poor creature of course.

» At 2:06 a.m. Tuesday, an 18-year-old man wanted to turn himself in at the Police Department, 444 W. Grand Ave., for being intoxicated and underage.


You mite think this one was made up, but this is Rapids!

Alot of parents are making their teens do this as a last ditch effort to stop the problem.

The water on the fence and minnow bucket have me scratching my head ?????????????

At 8:54 a.m. Wednesday, a Wisconsin Rapids man reported the theft of a wallet, which he left in a shopping cart at Copps Food Centers, 900 E. Riverview Expressway.

» At 10:25 a.m. Wednesday, a Nekoosa man reported his daughter called him saying a man was yelling into a cellphone in the 800 block of South Section Street, Nekoosa. Dispatch also received two 911 calls from the same man about the Holocaust.

» At 5:21 p.m. Wednesday, a woman reported a boy yelling something near the intersection of Cranmoor Road and Highway G, Port Edwards.

The bomb squad was called for a rubber glove filled with some liquid hanging from a basketball hoop. Photo shows a policeman using a fellow policeman's shoulder to balance a pellet gun used to shoot the rubber glove. The liquid was determined to be soap.

man stuff like that makes "stupid rednecks" down here in the south look smart

FYI, there are plenty of rednecks above the Mason-Dixon line. And, the Chief of Police quoted for the record that this was not an over reaction. The caller did the right thing in calling 911.

This is from my hometown newspaper...good for a few laughs:
http://brainerddispatch.com/slideshow/best-police-blotter#slide=0
Click on the arrow to advance...there are 66 of them.

» At 2:53 p.m. Thursday, a Wisconsin Rapids woman requested an officer take fingerprints from her faucet because it keeps getting turned on and flooding her home when she is not there in the 4600 block of Eighth Street South. The officer determined the flooding was the result of a broken water line.

Thanks MnMan. I needed a good laugh.

At 9 p.m. Tuesday, a caller reported a large turtle on the road near the intersection of Wilson Street and Highway 34, causing a hazard. The turtle turned out to be a dead raccoon.

It might look like a turtle after a few days..

At 1:39 p.m. Tuesday, a woman reported a Wisconsin Rapids man called her and left a “nasty” message about the voices in his furnace and trailer.

Hey Mike, since you started posting your wonderful police calls, thirteen new residents have moved to the Rapids. Keep up the good work!

We had one the other day, "man arrested for assault for hitting girlfriend with burrito"

They were arguing over cigarettes,, alcohol was involved,,
It also stated the woman felt "fearful" after being struck.

She should be glad he wasn't eating a footlong hot dog or she could have reported that he slapped her up side the head with his wiener!

A fight this evening in the 2500 block of Baker Avenue in Evansville sent one person to the hospital.

Police say the fight was among neighbors, and involved a frying pan and a can of corn.

One man was cut on the head and taken to the hospital by ambulance.

Police say alcohol was involved, and made the incident very hard to investigate. Police say at this point the victim does not want to press charges.

Alcohol, Corn, and Frying pans..........bad mix i guess. Shoulda left the corn in the house until everyone sobered up. Lol!

"A hole has been found in the nudist colony fence. Police are looking into it".

Ha Ha I get it Viking!

A nudie camp in juneau?.....BRRR!

At 12:41 p.m. Tuesday, a Grand Rapids man reported a dog chased a cat across Townline Road in Grand Rapids. The caller believed the dog was starving.

At 9:42 a.m. Thursday, a caller wanted the FBI and police to stop wire tapping and microwave pulsing

A hole in the fence.

• At 11:27 a.m. Tuesday, a Wisconsin Rapids woman reported her pit bull was missing and then came back wearing a different coller

At 10:17 a.m. Tuesday, a caller reported a dog bit a 13-year-old boy on his legs, stomach, arms and hands in the 6900 block of Fairview Lane, Saratoga.

I wonder if it was the same dog?

Mike, I love where I live, but it doesn't come close to beauty of your area. Combine that with your police reports and and I can almost feel the sudden influx of people to your area. And since every house, old or new, has bats, we are talking big bucks!

The only thing Paul, is that so few people here have more than 50 bucks that I rarely work in town. People here will be selling all there beer cans to buy a box of bullets to kill a deer with.

At 8:20 a.m. Tuesday, an anonymous caller reported a duck quacking all the time in a shed in the 2500 block of Engler Drive

• At 5:04 a.m. Monday, a man reported seeing a woman roll her car three times and then drive off in the 3000 block of Plover Road, Biron.

I may or may not know about this

I just dont get why someone would call 911 if they saw a car roll over, damaging only itself, and drive away? Its a free show man, enjoy it!

Mike, The law in Nebraska states vehicle damage,over a certain amount,has to be reported. Leaving the scene without reportung is also a crime. 'Big Brother' knows what's best,for you.

Charlie

This past weekend a call came over the scanner saying there was an accident on Main Street with "entrapment" As it turned out a fella know to consume large amounts of alcohol on a regular basis was atempting to remove refrgerator out of a second floor apartment.It got away from him and he fell to the bottom of the steps with the refrigerator landing on top of him on the sidewalk.
Not necessarily a stupid police call but certainly strange one. BTW, He lived.

Maybe the Nebraska officers need more work. This actually happened to me in Milwaukee county. I rear ended a lady that decided to slam on the brakes for an imaginary car as we were both pulling away from a Stop sign. Clearly my fault, I called 911. The operator asked if anyone was injured, were both vehicles driveable, and did we both have insurance. Despite the fact that I caved in the ladies trunk, the answer was no, yes, and yes. We were instructed to trade insurance numbers and be on our way. I was only too happy to oblige!

• At 2:06 p.m. Wednesday, a Wisconsin Rapids man reported he bought Windows 7 offline and that the company had blocked the product key.


Now I ask you, do you really think the police are going to help you in this matter?

Cyber cops lol

He probably figured tactical support was the same as technical support.

maybe the lady was seriously hammered and the caller wanted to stop her from plowing into some kids...

She probably was hammered, but not many kids out at 5 AM.

lazy american kids! heck the kids have been in the sweat shops for a couple houirs already in china...

I know, right? Its weird how starvation is such a motivator.

• AT 5:58 p.m. Thursday, a caller reported a man in the 600 block of Eighth Street South who had been watching children and talking to signs for about 45 minutes.

He was probably wearing a blutooth. I always think people are talking to themselves, then I see them on the phone.

Mike, I am beginning to see why there is not a large influx of people to your area! I can also picture in my mind that the people who are already there may not have a real steady cash flow!

Mike i had a sheep rancher come to me with yote problems, lost about 30 sheep and then decided to call me . He must have moved from your area to mine...lol He didnt have any money also!

Saw this guy the other day...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a77Dw3tNv8o

That dude is heeeelarious!

Yeah....Fluffy is great. Cops like him too....

At 6:04 p.m. Saturday, a neighbor reported six to eight children doing damage to property at the Evangelical Free Church, 611 Cook Ave. An officer determined the children were playing volleyball and not causing damage.

I would think some bizzy body should be getting a ticket for making up stories.

• At 12:39 p.m. Sunday, a caller reported having trouble with a neighbor whose pitbulls killed cats in the caller’s garage. The officer forwarded a complaint to the humane officer for the caller having too many cats.

Good Call

• At 7:36 p.m. Sunday, a caller reported a vehicle parked in the 2100 block of Eighth Street South with a Playboy magazine laid out in the backseat for the public to view

Why were they looking in the window if it wasnt there car?

• At 11:13 a.m. Saturday, a Grand Rapids man reported a dead deer floating in his pond in the 4900 block of Washington Street, Grand Rapids.

And how is this a police matter?

• At 7:12 p.m. Sunday, a caller reported a vehicle crash near the intersection of 48th Street South and Townline Road, Grand Rapids. A Grand Rapids officer said it was a bow-hunting incident


Maybe they wrote it wrong

??? A bow hunting accident ???

Perhaps he ment it happened at the bend in the curve.

Mike, how do you ever get anything done? This real life stuff is way funnier than fiction!

On the way to my truck, I avoid having eye contact with my neighbors, or that will initiate a conversation which will last till noon. Then I dodge 90 year olds driving cadilacs and buicks, and bicycles untill Im out of town. Once im on the freeway Im pretty much safe. I try to spend as much time away from home as possible.

This is for anyone who may have missed it: A Chinese buffet was temporarily shut down after customers complained that a road-killed deer was hauled through the eating area into the kitchen. ( Now you know why those egg rolls taste so good ) Apparently the garbage can that the deer was in leaked, because a third employee was following and mopping up the blood. Everyone of you that would have laughed and kept on eating, raise your hands.