The last several weeks I have been staying fatigued and wiped out. Resulting in lots of symptoms flaring uo and just not feeling well. Never know what to expect is what's expected.

2 days ago my left eye center vision started to be like looking through glasses with a smug on them and slightly like it looks after looking at a bright light. Today if I close my right eye vision in left is so blurry and out of focuse I cant read anything smaller than about 3/8 of an inch. Or larger size print. The eye stuff is new.



On the bright side at least its not my right and dominant eye. Every day is an adventure and the good days that used to be taken forgranted are much more appreciated these days. This sure is a good way to get perspective and develop more empathy for others now that I have got a small tast of what they may be going through.

Im truly blessed, not inspite of the new challenges but becuse of them. Yes it still sucks but I try to find the positive.

Has a well meaning lady at a gas station notice my hobbling last week on a rougher day. Started with prayer and how God can heal me. Had a touch of self righteousness along with it.

I smiled she took that wrong as in I didn't believe or have faith and doubled down on how he can. I told her yes he absolutely can and would be no challenge for him at all. But who am I to be presumptuous about God's will and plan that I should not have these issues. That God tends to have a way of allowing bad to happen to achieve good. So though difficult at time I prefer to embrace it look for the good and know God has it and is in control. And im truly blessed

Sorry to read about that. Sounds like a tough road ahead. I wish you the best on your battle with MS. From previous post it sounds like you're trying to do some things you enjoy in case you can't later on.

PF,
Hope you improve.

Are you still working?

I wish you well and staying positive is good medicine. May God be with you each and every day.

Yes, and hope to for some time but have really been cutting back. Missed more in the last 2 months than the last 5 years. Have not worked any days off in weeks and been turning down in earlys and out lates . Got forced out late 2 times last week. Only been forced 7 times in 20 years and two were last week. I never get forced befues I generally volunteer or am maxed out on hours. Quite the change for sure.

I've mentioned before my wife has had MS many years, unfortunately it has progressed lately...symptoms will come and go, in different areas, the fatigue is always there , pain is always there..balance issues are common, falling is common, brain fog is common....
People may say, "but you look fine"...well, you're not, but it doesn't show physically...
Only thing you can do, is take one day at a time, with the best attitude you can muster...there is no cure, the meds often make things worse...

Hope for a remission, for awhile, but the flares WILL come back, prepare for a future that you didn't want....sorry...

Ya im a bit thick. Takes me a while to clue in to new issues. He few are a few examples

Started getting tired and wore out often with no reason for it. My reasoning was must be geting older

Started stumbling and dropping things. Man im just geting clumsy.

Most recently with my eye. I keep cleaning my glasses had the cleanest glasses in the world for a few days until I closed one eye and noticed the difference.

Knowing how to prepare for something thats random and you cant control is rough. But is why I had worked so much the last 3 years. 1 st it put me in a better place financial if I get to where I can work by becoming debt free and making investment. So I dont need as much cash to live on as I used to. 2nd higher earning years increase that goes int social security and in turn increased what you get if you do end up disabled. 3 it gave me back some feeling of control over my life when my own body is working against me.

I may not be far off from not being able to work. In the last month I went off the road driving, arms didn't respond or brain didn't send the single. Brain fog is a problem at work some times, as well as fatigue, weak tingeling legs. Really is puting a damper on my 30 year plan. Wanted to retire early at 56 and do a lot of traveling. If things dont improve it may be forced early retirement without the physical and financial ability to do much. Or at least greatly reduced ability to do much.

I wont get board I have a farm and always things to do on good days. One big concern i have is how summer heat will effect my ability to function doing that.. Will I even be able to work the bees Should I try to get a tractor with cab and ac. Will I be better selling out and moving to a different climate. Are lines of thought I have had with huge variation due to so much unknown. This summer should give me some data points.

Oh..and summer heat, or a hot tub will send you spiraling,

Remember the old saying...."When you make plans, God laughs"

gcs, I hadn't heard that old saying...it is classic

PF you are in my prayers for your health to improve.
Sir, your work ethic is outstanding!

Many of the syptoms you are haveing with MS are very similar to what i have with kidney failure. The sudden fatigue, it seems sleeping wears a guy out sometimes. Energy is fleeting at best.and doesn't last. The brain fog comes and goes. and I also just wasted away to where I feel like I am made of smoke. Weigh in at about 114 today, just not much there anymore but God been seeing me through and still can enjoy life such as it is. Sounds like you do the same, at least even if we can't do as we used to, we still can function somewhat. Still things to be grateful for. Getting to see the kids grow up is a real blessing isn't it? I think we can appreciate it more deep, we are tough enough

Before my stepmother got her liver transplant her levels of toxic stuff would build up and it greatly affected her mind. Last time dad said anything her kidneys are now compromised I dont remember why.

Is a kidney transplant an option for you? Besides my step mom and friend son also had a liver transplant befor he was a year old. Its incredibly what they can do in the right situations.

I hate hearing your struggling. Down to 114 you must also be incredibly weak.

I think the cognitive issues are the worst part for me. Knowing things are off not being able to speak and get the words out and such. Sure makes you thankful for the good days and of how much I have taken for granted over the years. .

Thanks, I can sure understand, to lose the cognitve functioning brain would be a nightmare, if you know what is going on. My father had dementia his last few years. It is hard to see someone go from sharp mind to a frail diaper wearing man in a wheelchair holding a stuffed toy. My sister said he seemed happy though so maybe the person doesn't feel it the same as we see it. Hope so. When all this was first hitting me we atributed it to the medicines I was taking trying to shake the flu (we thought) instead it was toxin build up that made me go in and out of delirium. At the end I thought I was resting peacefully and wasn't hurting anymore. To the wife and kids thouhg they said I was moaning and trashing around. Even though I kept saying no they called an amulance. They life flighted me to Great Falls and three days later I woke up and hooked up like a cyborg. Got over everything but the kidney failure, that stayed at End Stage. At first I was tld a transplant was a good choice. I had started off at 155lb and great physical shape. Trouble is there are no transplant centers in Montana and I would have to get to Spokane for all the testing, the transplant itself and then stay for 3 weeks after the surgery ,all at my expense. Couldn't swing it, so have been on dialysis for 9 years now. A couple of years ago I hit a spell lost wieght down to 104 in just a week or so, we thought that was it, but God figured otherwise. You are right about the weakness, I feel like I am made of smoke, hardly even there. . Pain is pretty constant but tolerable most times. I am lucky though with being able to do the work I do. If I can't handle being in the shop I sit at the table and paint. As long as I can productive it's worth putting up with the pain and such. And if I know my mind is more gone than working I can just stop treatment and in a couple weeks drift away How is your stepmother doing these days?

She is doing well but now has kidney problems i believe due to the anti rejection and other drugs. She walks all hunched over at times. Sometime she seems like she is herself and sharp other times not so much. Can come up with some completely unrelated off the wall ideas that have not a thing to do with the conversation going on. I believe she has some permanent damage from high toxic levels. I cant remember the stage her kidney are in but it didnt sound great.


My wife had me call my neurologist office this morning about the vision change. I did thinking it was going be pointless like the last few times i called them with symptom changes but They told me to go to an ER so I can get testing done quickly and schedule a follow up. They said if some thing have happened and not caught fast the problem may become permanent. So looks like I will be spending my day off in an ER. Being immune compromised from ms treatment its the last place I want to be. Taking the dog for a ride in the truck around the farm first. I want to see how things are greening up after all the bushoging I did last week and check and see if I have any bees to work.