In a 33 year marriage is it too much to ask a wife to totally eliminate her liberal ideology from our marriage. Im talking about ignoring the news , social media and she wants to be an activist when she retires. Our relationship/sex life is very good when these things dont exist. I asked her the other day to possibly stay off of the news. Her answer was its impossible to not know what is going on in the world and it would be like living in a bubble not knowing what is going on. I strongly dislike the news and politics.

Too much to ask, no. Likelihood of it happening, I wouldn’t hold my breath. It sounds like she is worshipping at the alter of ideology. If she’s a Christian woman, I think a call to repentance would be wha it would take, but I’m not sure who it would need to come from. It sounds like she has elevated her ideology above Jesus

Religion & Politics have ended countless marriages....Best to have all that aligned before the vows.

When we were in our early 20’s we didnt talk about politics or the liberal ideology. I get it now but back then it wasnt even a thing.

If you can't articulate your own beliefs, why would you expect her to change hers?

Im not sure i follow what you mean.

If you strongly dislike news and politics, then why do you take such an interest in your wife's political views? Shouldn't you be indifferent?

Can you clarify? Asking her not to watch/follow the news is different than asking her to not talk about politics with you.

ol' dad

For more context, you should read this thread:
https://trapperman.com/forum/ubbthreads.php/topics/8549043/re-progressive-church

Or don't, and just read this one. They'll be pretty much the same.

I feel that the liberal ideology is a demonic ideology. Why have that in a marriage. If something causes problems in a marriage then why do it. No different than if i were to go to a strip club and pay to watch nude woman dance. Is that good for a marriage.

Drive her to Minneapolis....and call it good.

Same Original Poster.....

This fellas cheese done slid off his cracker....

ol' dad

In most marriages, the husband leads the wife. Have you tried being the leader in your marriage?

Keith

I would work the angle that she seems angry when she watches the news and that anger has proven to be bad for health , it certainly stresses your relationship for sure.

I found my aunt going on a rant one day a few weeks ago about news stuff as we were waking to lunch so I asked if she was familiar with the serenity prayer

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change
the courage to change the things I can
and the wisdom to know the difference.

I told her I used to let the news burn me up , but it was like all anger it is holding the hot ember and expecting the other person to be burned. it just doesn't work.
I can not change the news , if it bleeds it leads and if you read the news you are miss informed , everything is presented to enrage the way it is phrased , talked about , everything response equals rating.

so there are things I can change I can vote or support certain things.

but that wisdom to know what and how much energy I should give it is so important.
energy I give to the TV goes no where
energy shouting at the crowds goes no where
anger burning in me only hurts me.

so apply the serenity prayer to anger , the news , the media , social media

I mean if we are talking about addiction , just because the substance isn't alcohol the words don't apply the same.


maybe you can convince here to journal about how she feels each night , then take a month break from the news and continue the journaling maybe work in a what are you thankful for each day in that journal prompt.

maybe she can see how much better she feels when not burning with all that anger
how much better life is not letting the anger take all her energy for you and her family.


by the way if you call it liberal ideology to her , she will get angry at that also so approach as a friend and not a foe to let her see the anger burning her from the inside is poisoning your relationship.

If she's been like this for 33 years of marriage , yes, it's too much to ask. Most people can't shut off like a light switch

This has happened in the last 8 years when menopause hit.

Maybe work on a compromise. I have friends in the same boat. It is a real bone of contention with them. I have had liberal friends disown me and kick me out of the fakebook friends. I think Liberals can be very unreasonable but I think there could be some kind of compromise in a marriage.

Yes that is the angle im working. She goes next door to the man hating liberal lady and talks with her and then comes home mad. She went to a progressive church pastor the other day and the same thing… she came home mad. Went and locked herself in room for a couple of hours.