I always answered, " You!", with a wink.
She stopped asking, lol

My wife wants to know what I am going to do tomorrow. After I tell her, she always asks if I need help. If I need help, she helps, if not, she makes plans of her own.

it took me years to understand why the anxiety would pop up about mid day Friday.

first I understood why it came up right before every holiday , thinking first it was just holiday stress , the cooking and such but
It was when her parents fought.
every holiday there was a fight , never anything physical , just lots yelling and anger and tension. so she walked around on tip toes trying not to set either one off.
do exactly what was expected and try to never be the cause of a argument.
walking around like your on broken glass for your childhood programs a person.

I was coming from such a different place in my family. My Dad was a teamster truck driver when I was a kid , vacation was precious and both my parents worked , we were going into Friday with a fish fry , ball games , scout camping , family gatherings , fishing or piling in the fun before it was work all week again.
If I got the lawn mowed on Thursday that was more fishing time on the weekend.

Her Friday afternoon anxiety was a deeply programed dread of another weekend of fights. we were married 25 years before she passed and it was still there , but a good list and plans she could help calm that anxiety.
crazy how we can get programed and it takes decades if ever to de-program.

so how about a little Friday music
this was a lot more my Friday song pulling out of work just their math is off 62 hours at 5pm Friday.
this song was played lot on the country station at about 5:10 on Fridays pull out of the work parking lot blaring from the FM radio on the truck.



she hadn't talked to her parents in 7 years when she passed , they are both still alive and were not invited to her memorial.
didn't even know she was sick , the day after the memorial they didn't know was happening or had happened and that her relatives were cool with keeping from them. her moms aunts , uncle and her cousins were at the memorial. they had seen their behavior at the other uncles funeral and that made them not want to deal with it either.
so the day after the memorial 11 days after she passed I got a call from a number I didn't recognize I had been expecting a call about a tool box I was looking at on marketplace. so I answered it and it was my father in law.
he had gotten a peice of mail from her high school sending condolences and he was confused.
Oh man that was a call I had been dreading.
stomach in my throat , I explained yes she had passed on the 2nd it was cancer she had known she had it 6 months and that she had been very specific in asking me not to say anything till after the memorial was over. I expected about anything more than what I got. he said oh , I am sorry for your loss , like he was talking to a co-worker he hardly knew that entire call when I looked at the timer on my phone 2 minutes 45 seconds and a that's too bad I'm sorry for your loss and i bet I was the one talking explaining things for most of it.

so look a little deeper at why she asks and maybe you will find a better reason.
you probably can't fix it , but might at least understand it a little better. so you can tell her what your plans are and make it work for her.

They don't come with an operators manual for a reason.
I could go on and on describing those reasons, but I am certain, beyond a doubt, that I would be wrong.
As long as she still smells nice and isn't stubbly, I'm good.

If I recall GCP, youre not that much older than me. I cant imagine being in your shoes, Im very sorry for your loss