I got invited to a "celebration of life" for a friend that died 4 months ago. He was cremated and no funeral. The celebration will have live music and food and is an open house at a bar for 5 hours. I've only been to funerals, never one of these. Do you dress up or casual? Take a sympathy card? Put money in it? Take a guest? ( my niece is visiting that weekend) Any other thoughts?

Usually dress casual sometimes they ask you to wear certain things such as sports jerseys of the person's favorite team etc.usually take a card with a gift of money enclosed.as far as taking your niece i always ask myself what would the person that passed want.bring a family member or friend if you think that would have been OK then by all means do it.

That has to be quite the experience for you, Corky. If I was in that situation, I would contact the living family member I am closest to and comfortable with and simply ask some of those questions. I am not sure regarding the cards and donations, etc. It's certainly new territory!

Good luck to you, friend!
Patrice

Seems like this is the most common event that I have been going to lately and sure wish we could jump into 2027. Way too many this year. Additionally, with the skyrocketing funeral costs, this is a growing trend. The vast majority I have been to tend to be more on the casual side - Jeans/polo shirt. I think of the person who passed and if it was most common to see them in jeans/T-shirt Vs dress pants/button shirt reflected on how attendees dressed. All of them had a card box out. We left a sympathy card if we had not already mailed one to the surviving family. One that I attended had an adapter/HDMI transmitter you plugged into your phone and your screen mirrored on a big screen. Was enjoyable to see the variety of pics shared amongst close friends with everyone. Shown the quality of friendships made through life.

Open house at a bar - I would bring a guest if they were acquainted.

A friend of mine had an unusual twist on a celebration of life. One of his duck hunting buddies was dying of cancer and in the last few days of his life all the hunters got together in his hospice room and plotted the celebration of life he would have. The dying man was part of it too.

After he died and was cremated the rest of the buddies got the ashes and reloaded them into 12 ga shells. At one of the favorite hunting spots (an island in the Willamette river) they had an overnight bonfire... grilled meats, drank whiskey, and shot his ashes over towards private property; a slough where they had never been able to get permission to hunt!

There usually way more relaxed and up beat. So semi casual clothing .
Now alot of folks find the. Really weird . Wife just didn't get it , she's seen more and more since being around a black community more and she hair doesn't get why your not trying to be sad at a funeral lol

These are becoming more prominent in this area. Dress is usually upper end casual. No suit but no torn blue jeans either. Like hound one said, I have been to one where Pittsburgh Steelers attire was worn. Another was your favorite sports team, college, pro , football, hockey, whatever you preferred. As far as money, if I sent a memorial when the person passed, I did not put any in the "card box" set up at the celebration. I do not see a reason why you should not be allowed a guest.

The celebrations are usually more relaxed then a funeral, and it seems like a better way to share memories of the deceased. G.

A friend died 2 years ago, and his wife had celebration of life party. Friends played in a band, so music all day, food, life stories and we spread his ashes at his deer stands on the property. Heartfelt, a lot of tears and laughter.

Every one that I've been to has been casual and very laid back. Way more good stories and laughter than tears. Most COLs have been at least a couple months or more since the passing, so most everybody had time to process the loss. Last one I went to had a 50/50... Half went to his charity and the other half was the winner's to keep - No give back per his wishes

I agree. I also find it tasteful to wear a stainless sidearm being it is still a semi-formal occassion.

They're all different. Read the room or just ask.

I've been to them in a suit with a pastor leading the room and I've been in a t shirt and no one spoke at all and it was like a grad party with beer, booze, food and pics.

Not sure I'd treat it like a wedding reception and bring someone who didn't know the person, but not my friend.

My Son was home for a weekend when one of his classmates died in a wreck. They stuck around for the funeral. His smokin hot little Mexican girlfriend only had a scarlet red dress which accented her ample bosom so thats what she wore. Nobody complained.

They are just not the same when the dead guy aint propped up in the corner with a bottle of whiskey in his lap.

very much depends on the person and their family.

for my wife , she was jeans and graphic T any time she didn't need to be more dressed up.
we hung her collection of graphic T's up on the wall , had a pot luck , and it was a good

I also let everyone know attire was graphic T wear a funny , favorite or literary reference as she was also a huge reader and involved with the library.

you could call the family and ask because really these are all different.

money is never really frown upon since there are generally expenses , a good rule of thumb is if you and your niece were to go out to lunch put that much or more in a card.

It is a celebration of life

Wear what you think the person would want you to, take anyone they would welcome

And CELEBRATE their life and the times you had

Thank you all for your input. It is very helpful.

Wear your dress knife,,not just some old beater.

Casual and bring a card. The most important thing is to show up.

Strangely enough, the last one I went to was in the same building they hold the Michigan Trapper Predator Caller Convention at in Evart.

Deep down I could still smell a hint of gland lure.

The pastor stood right where JR & Sons usually sets up their booth.

Sure is different for when I was a kid. My dad was the youngest of 12, 8 girls and 4 boys, over a 20 year period of time so I was "drugged" to many funerals over the early years of all sorts of relatives that I did not even know. Most were in my G-father home and very formal and sad affairs that lasted all day and into the evening. Don't like funerals at all any more because of those sessions. Now adays I have been to the celebration of life, my nice affairs and don't last so long and I still feel the lost but not the boring wait for things to be over......jk