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Friends negative attitude #8500856
11/10/25 07:17 AM
11/10/25 07:17 AM
Joined: Mar 2013
IL
H
houndone Offline OP
trapper
houndone  Offline OP
trapper
H

Joined: Mar 2013
IL
Ive got a real good friend that has become increasingly negative about everything.i talked to him last night and every subject we talked about he was negative about.this has been going on for awhile but getting to the point I almost don't want to answer the phone when he calls.i don't want to lose a friendship but it's hard to try and talk to someone who's so negative about everything at least for me.

Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: houndone] #8500861
11/10/25 07:20 AM
11/10/25 07:20 AM
Joined: Aug 2012
Blackduck Minnesota
B
Big Sam Offline
trapper
Big Sam  Offline
trapper
B

Joined: Aug 2012
Blackduck Minnesota
If he's a good enough friend that you don't want to lose him, then he ought to be a good enough friend to talk to him about the situation.

Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: houndone] #8500868
11/10/25 07:37 AM
11/10/25 07:37 AM
Joined: Jan 2023
Pennsylvania
elsmasho82 Offline
trapper
elsmasho82  Offline
trapper

Joined: Jan 2023
Pennsylvania
It’s very draining to be around that kind of toxicity. If it is already affecting you, you have every right to at least limit interactions with him. You can still help him, but cannot be responsible for his happiness.

Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: houndone] #8500874
11/10/25 07:46 AM
11/10/25 07:46 AM
Joined: Apr 2017
PA
L
lumberjack391 Offline
trapper
lumberjack391  Offline
trapper
L

Joined: Apr 2017
PA
My one friend stops by occasionally and always reminds me of how long it took for the conversation to go south. Usually within 5 minutes. I find fault like theres some kind of reward in it.

Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: houndone] #8500890
11/10/25 08:11 AM
11/10/25 08:11 AM
Joined: Mar 2010
S.C. Montana
M
MTtraps Offline
trapper
MTtraps  Offline
trapper
M

Joined: Mar 2010
S.C. Montana
Had a friend like that, always negative. I try to change things around to a more positive tone/ If that doesn;t work I just shorten the conversation, life is too short to spend it in misery

Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: houndone] #8500897
11/10/25 08:21 AM
11/10/25 08:21 AM
Joined: Aug 2022
TN
K
Krig Offline
trapper
Krig  Offline
trapper
K

Joined: Aug 2022
TN
I spent years with one of the gripingest ( if that’s a word) good friends, that actually worked for me..he grumbled about everything on the planet.. sometimes I would just make up excuses to go pick up something just to get away… but he was my friend, so I put up with it..

Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: houndone] #8500899
11/10/25 08:22 AM
11/10/25 08:22 AM
Joined: Jul 2016
Wisconsin
B
Bear Tracker Offline
trapper
Bear Tracker  Offline
trapper
B

Joined: Jul 2016
Wisconsin
My sona nd his wife have become this way about everything. Distance is the only thing that has helped my wife and me as difficult as it is.

Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: houndone] #8500915
11/10/25 08:55 AM
11/10/25 08:55 AM
Joined: Dec 2006
South Dakota
S
Staner Offline
trapper
Staner  Offline
trapper
S

Joined: Dec 2006
South Dakota
Don't overlook the possibility that he may have medical issues that are affecting his outlook. He may not even be aware of a recent change in his health. A thorough physical is a good place to start if he hasn't had one recently.


Badges?? We don't need no stinkin' badges!!!

Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: houndone] #8500916
11/10/25 08:55 AM
11/10/25 08:55 AM
Joined: Sep 2013
Green County Wisconsin
G
GREENCOUNTYPETE Offline
trapper
GREENCOUNTYPETE  Offline
trapper
G

Joined: Sep 2013
Green County Wisconsin
you can confront it , maybe even record the next conversation so you have a way to play it back when he says no I don't

or you can let him go

confronting him about it might send him away , but then it was his choice and one he should be able to understand why.

I have an aunt who is getting like this when she starts on a rant I change topics.

Bear Tracker , that's a real shame but they feed on their anger or negativity for everything and they can't see anything good anywhere.


America only has one issue, we have a Responsibility crisis and everything else stems from it.
Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: houndone] #8500917
11/10/25 08:55 AM
11/10/25 08:55 AM
Joined: Mar 2023
WI
WI Outdoors Offline
trapper
WI Outdoors  Offline
trapper

Joined: Mar 2023
WI
Good luck.

Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: houndone] #8500923
11/10/25 09:01 AM
11/10/25 09:01 AM
Joined: Nov 2010
Indiana
D
DanN Offline
trapper
DanN  Offline
trapper
D

Joined: Nov 2010
Indiana
He could be having issues with un diagnosed depression or health issues.

Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: houndone] #8500926
11/10/25 09:02 AM
11/10/25 09:02 AM
Joined: Dec 2006
Northern Maine
Bruce T Offline
trapper
Bruce T  Offline
trapper

Joined: Dec 2006
Northern Maine
Very draining being around people like that.I would tell him and simply ask him to try and be more positive.


NRA,NTA,MTA,FTA

#1 goal=Trap a wolverine
Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: houndone] #8500932
11/10/25 09:23 AM
11/10/25 09:23 AM
Joined: Dec 2006
Three Lakes,WI 74
C
corky Offline
trapper
corky  Offline
trapper
C

Joined: Dec 2006
Three Lakes,WI 74
I used to be like that. One of my clients actually nicknamed me "Mr. Angry" after a local DJ using that persona. One day I realized that we are in a position that most of the things I was angry about were things that don't personally affect me and I couldn't do much about them anyway. It helps to not have children to worry about. I still get irritated but now am more of an informed observer and if I feel upset I just move on. Life is too short to live it PO'd all the time.


http://www.usdebtclock.org/
This place is getting more like Facebook every day.

Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: houndone] #8500944
11/10/25 09:40 AM
11/10/25 09:40 AM
Joined: Feb 2022
Arkansas
W
WhiteCliffs Offline
trapper
WhiteCliffs  Offline
trapper
W

Joined: Feb 2022
Arkansas
Good luck. I had a friend like that. Me and wife were driving along and he calls and I put him on truck speaker. He ended up cussing me like a yard dog over absolutely nothing. When conversation was over, and I had hung up, my wife said I dont know why you still answer to phone when he call. I told her the past 40 years of good friendship. deserved something. It got so bad my wife told me to go outside and talk on the phone when he called. I tried for five years to fix this. My advice - let him know what you think - give it a few months - if it doesnt change, cut that person out of your life. There is something wrong with them, dont waste much time on them.

Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: houndone] #8500948
11/10/25 09:54 AM
11/10/25 09:54 AM
Joined: Dec 2006
Williamsport, Pa.
J
jk Offline
trapper
jk  Offline
trapper
J

Joined: Dec 2006
Williamsport, Pa.
Worse than that. I have two, one my neighbor, was great guy always doing something. Some deep mechanicing in the cars, changing timing belts and cam shafts and stuff. We hunted together but he did not trap (ok with me). But he retired 5 or 6 years ago and does NOTHING absolutely nothing but complains constantly. I almost can not stand to be around him. If I do anything outside and he comes over he always tells me I am doing it wrong or he would have done it this other way. He enters my house with out knocking and just stands there--startles me and he answers my telephone and says that they have the wrong number. I now hide my car keys too, he is an awful driver, the slowest on the road---Well on back streets so am I but interstates look out here i come, not him 5 mph under the speed limit all the time. Oh well after all these year together I do owe him but it is hard......jk


Free people are not equal. Equal people are not free. What's supposed to be ain't always is. Hopper Hunter
Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: jk] #8500950
11/10/25 10:01 AM
11/10/25 10:01 AM
Joined: May 2011
Oakland, MS
yotetrapper30 Offline
trapper
yotetrapper30  Offline
trapper

Joined: May 2011
Oakland, MS
Originally Posted by jk
Worse than that. I have two, one my neighbor, was great guy always doing something. Some deep mechanicing in the cars, changing timing belts and cam shafts and stuff. We hunted together but he did not trap (ok with me). But he retired 5 or 6 years ago and does NOTHING absolutely nothing but complains constantly. I almost can not stand to be around him. If I do anything outside and he comes over he always tells me I am doing it wrong or he would have done it this other way. He enters my house with out knocking and just stands there--startles me and he answers my telephone and says that they have the wrong number. I now hide my car keys too, he is an awful driver, the slowest on the road---Well on back streets so am I but interstates look out here i come, not him 5 mph under the speed limit all the time. Oh well after all these year together I do owe him but it is hard......jk


Comes in your house without knocking and then answers your phone and tells people they have the wrong number?? No way I would put up with all that. You need to start locking your doors.


Proudly banned from the NTA.

Bother me tomorrow. Today I'll buy no sorrows.
Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: houndone] #8500951
11/10/25 10:08 AM
11/10/25 10:08 AM
Joined: Feb 2020
Indiana
P
Providence Farm Offline
trapper
Providence Farm  Offline
trapper
P

Joined: Feb 2020
Indiana
You become like the top 5 people you are around most. You dont want that rubbing off. I have had people like that at work and flat out told them the sky is not falling pointed out good possibilities of stuff they were complaining about. It won't change the behavior pattern even if they agree with you at the time.

Life is to short to wast it on these people.

A lot of people get a bad shake, sick or disabled kids, spouse or themselves. Job loss or other financial hardships, Death of loved ones ect. some will get bitter and few would blaim them. Others seem to find the positive and stay positive.

We can't control what happens in life to a large extent but we can control how we respond to it.

I have a young man in work with just started about a year ago. His first week i advised him to increase his 401 contribution up to 15% minimum preferable 20% . he was going from $14 an hour to over $30. He would still get a larger pay check than he had in his life and would never miss the money he had never had. But let lifestyle creep in and....

He didn't. He was really geting down on himself yesterday. Bought 2 new vehicle and big new house. It was not just the $ per hour increase but ability to work crazy overtime$$$. Example I increased income over 100% due to over time last year. And he and his wife got a taste If that income and started spending it like drunk sailors.

Now he is covered up with bills and has to work OT to get by. He woke up to it and seemed really down about his mistakes and he should have listened to me. I just smiled and told him thats just part of the cost of education. Everything cost money, education is expensive. Learn from it. If you went to a university for education its going to cost you. Mistakes on the stock market will cost you, ect.. Make a plan to fix/overcome the mistake and stick to it. Geting down on yourself is unproductive wast of energy spent the effort comeing up with a plan to get where you want to be.

Last edited by Providence Farm; 11/10/25 10:20 AM.
Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: yotetrapper30] #8500953
11/10/25 10:15 AM
11/10/25 10:15 AM
Joined: Dec 2006
Coldspring Texas
Savell Offline
trapper
Savell  Offline
trapper

Joined: Dec 2006
Coldspring Texas
Originally Posted by yotetrapper30
Originally Posted by jk
Worse than that. I have two, one my neighbor, was great guy always doing something. Some deep mechanicing in the cars, changing timing belts and cam shafts and stuff. We hunted together but he did not trap (ok with me). But he retired 5 or 6 years ago and does NOTHING absolutely nothing but complains constantly. I almost can not stand to be around him. If I do anything outside and he comes over he always tells me I am doing it wrong or he would have done it this other way. He enters my house with out knocking and just stands there--startles me and he answers my telephone and says that they have the wrong number. I now hide my car keys too, he is an awful driver, the slowest on the road---Well on back streets so am I but interstates look out here i come, not him 5 mph under the speed limit all the time. Oh well after all these year together I do owe him but it is hard......jk


Comes in your house without knocking and then answers your phone and tells people they have the wrong number?? No way I would put up with all that. You need to start locking your doors.


Lol …. This guy sounds hilarious


Insert profound nonsense here
Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: Savell] #8500979
11/10/25 11:33 AM
11/10/25 11:33 AM
Joined: Dec 2019
Iowa
C
CTRAPS Offline
trapper
CTRAPS  Offline
trapper
C

Joined: Dec 2019
Iowa
Originally Posted by Savell
Lol …. This guy sounds hilarious


That guy sounds like he wants a scab put on his nose.


Life Member: ITA, IBA, MTA & NRA. Member of SA, FTA & NTA
Re: Friends negative attitude [Re: houndone] #8500990
11/10/25 11:54 AM
11/10/25 11:54 AM
Joined: Dec 2006
East-Central Wisconsin
B
bblwi Offline
trapper
bblwi  Offline
trapper
B

Joined: Dec 2006
East-Central Wisconsin
If he is a good friend to and for you, it may be helpful for you to listen to his negative look at life and the world. It may help him to move on and get past this phase.

Bryce

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